Note: I am especially looking for sides that can be prepared ahead.. and a dessert to be puchased or made ahead.

Bonus points for options that are low salt and low potassium (no tomatoes).

ETA: It didn't come to me until just now-- but a mexican theme is appropriate given we are doing a butterly launch of Monarchs-- which are about to migrate to their winter home in Mexico. I like when things come together like this!

I’d love to help you with suggestions but you’ve gotten about as far out of my wheelhouse as possible. I don’t cook Mexican food…. but I eat it!!!

I suggest that you repost over on the Cooking Forum. https://www.houzz.com/discussions/tag=319 This link ought to get you there.

A tres leches cake is better if made a day or two ahead.

https://tastesbetterfromscratch.com/tres-leches-cake/

Have fun, I know your mother will love her day.

Actually, mexican/south american is one of the things I cook best-- not sure how to explain it but I have a natural ability with the flavor profiles. I am good with and without recipes. (Not the case with some other cuisines).

I am sure the cooking forum could help but I don't want to take on another forum right now-- it's more the "bringing a party together" strengths I am looking for from my online friends here! I'd love recipes too but I think the folks here have that big picture view that will produce some great ideas. I may change my mind and post over there later-- but for now, I will hold.

Thanks, @bbstx!

The menu looks great. I love eating biscochitos cookies when I go to New Mexico, I've never made them myself.

https://www.newmexico.org/things-to-do/cuisine/recipes/biscochitos/

Tres Leches cake would be perfect-- except a good majority of us are lactose intolerant. I know for a fact that I cannot eat it. :(

I am thinking maybe of a cake with lime and berries..

there is also a chocolate raspberry cake she loves. I picked one up from wegmans for some holiday or event in the last year and she dove right into it.. I am not opposed to buying a dessert. We have better bakeries than wegmans but i know she likes this one.

ETA: regarding dessert, she does love cheesecake (SHE isn't lactose intolerant) .. but as she said yesterday, she buys it herself when she wants it. It wouldn't be special. She does love "small bites".. not conducive to lighting 80 candles.. but like the meal, small bites fit her. I could just do a bunch of small dessert bites (or more likely BUY them) on a platter.. mini tarts, cakes, brownies, cookies scattered with flower blossoms and berries. The more i think of this, the more I know she'd love it.. and she'd have leftovers for days. Her heaven would be nothing but small sweet bites for days on end!

I’m with your mom…small sweet bites for days would be nirvana!

Your menu sounds wonderful, Funky.

We had my dad’s 80th party yesterday (a casual get-together) and decided no cake. He loves cheesecake, too, so we had a big slice from a local place (with cherries) that I put his 8 0 candles on. :)

We had cupcakes for guests; they were a big hit. The favorites were the iced strawberry shortcake ones — they had real strawberries in the middle.

I’ve had various Mexican food cupcakes — churro, hot chocolate, Tres Leches, etc.

This is an interesting one, upside down cupcakes:

https://mysliceofmexico.ca/2020/08/16/the-garibaldi-a-mexican-cupcake/

I wonder if you could substitute other types of milk in it. If you want to experiment, I volunteer to be your taste tester. :D

Other dessert ideas:

https://mysliceofmexico.ca/desserts-and-sweets/

Sopapillas can be used alone or in various dessert recipes.

This grilled cactus recipe looks so good:

https://mysliceofmexico.files.wordpress.com/2018/07/grilled-paddle-cactus-with-melted-cheese.pdf

Funky, I made these Churro Bars for Cinco de Mayo. Easy, yummy. Makes a 9x13 pan. I cut them in small squares. Would be great for your small bites theme. Happy BIrthday Mom of Funky!

Thank you for the recipes, Jinx and Maggieq! Sopapillas are a great idea but I do not want to be cooking during the party (other than grilling which will be assigned to introvert BILs who will appreciate the time away!) .. in your experience, do Sopapillas need to be made right before serving? I really wanted to purchase desserts but I could make a variety of cupcakes and churro bars the night before.

Annie, I like how you are thinking but there is a slope/hill up to the road where a food truck would sit. it would be a challenge and exhausting for mom with her current pain/mobility issues.

We did consider having the food catered-- there are two great restaurants I have used for catered events in the past. Both did a great job but we decided we wanted homemade. All of us are good cooks/grillers (thanks, Dad!) and that will make it more special and personal for mom. The prep won't be too bad since there will be 3 of us and everything is pretty simple. I will make the salsas ahead and purchase tamales from a local small business and possibly the sopes also.

I did consider making enchiladas -- but decided that we had mom's favorites covered and that I didn't need to take on the additional work. I am editing/farming out cooking where it makes sense. I want us to ALL to chill and enjoy the day.

Funky, no … I’ve made (or bought from local restaurants, my preference) batches of them to reheat or keep warm in the oven until serving.

Or, they could be used on or in other desserts and wouldn’t need to be served fresh.

Something with pralines would be good, too! Tons of recipes using them in various desserts or buy from a restaurant, and serve them as is, like cookies.

|Some ideas:

Aqua frescas to drink or aqua de jamaica (hibiscus iced tea)

Jicama citrus salad but this may be a bit redundant with the fruit platter.

If you do not go the churro route, a chocolate cake with cinnamon could be a good complement.

For dessert, a panna cotta made with coconut milk would bypass the lactose issue.

Wonderful menu!

Roasted Corn, Black Bean & Mango Salad is a fave of ours, but it might be partly duplicative. But also, how many are you cooking for? sounds like an awful lot of food.

\\

https://www.eatingwell.com/recipe/253066/roasted-corn-black-bean-mango-salad/

Funky, I love that you all are doing this for your mom. Soooo much better that you all are preparing it. I also wondered how many guests, as it does sound like alot of food. It all sounds so delish but depending on the number of guests, I might cut down a little. The idea of small bites for dessert is a good one! You could always buy a cupcake or some such to use for a candle for your mom.

There will be 18 attendees.. but we're working around some diet limitations mostly covered above but also add in a few who do not eat shrimp and some other "i'll eat this but not thats" (I can't eat beef yet.. mom doesn't eat chicken, etc)

While the list of food is long-- the "mtn bar" model for serving will allow us to prepare "just enough" of various fillings. I must have traditional ground beef tacos for mom-- and fajita filling for nephew with stage 4 kidney disease. I could cut pork without an issue. Some of the others are preferences of the cooks or cooks' children ;) I thought the overall variety/qty was good because..

• We are back to an afternoon AND evening event-- with some guests traveling from OOT
• Cocktails will be flowing so *I* feel it is important to have food available all day
• Taco meats can be made ahead-- Fajita meats will be grilled together. No extra work.

A few sides I could see removing.. some more reluctantly than others..

• Sopes are somewhat duplicative-- but such nice little bites for someone who didn't grab lunch. I am 75% likely to outsource these.
• Tamales are not required-- but they a fav of mine and I'm outsourcing them
• I could swap out charro beans for Mtn's bean salad which i think is fresher/prettier
• Mexican street corn salad-- but there are two attendees who won't eat vegetables if there is no corn-- plus it's prime corn season.
• Mexican shrimp cocktail is overkill, i guess-- but it is celebratory and so easy

What would you suggest is overkill and an option to cut (keeping in mind the menu was a group effort so lil sis has veto power)?

The issue I always have with that much variety is that, if I had 18 people for example, I would feel the need to have at least 18 servings of everything. Otherwise people could want to try something and it is all gone before they get to it. 18 servings of all of that is a ton of food. YMMV, and I get that you may know that certain subsets eat only certain things and not need 18 of each.

So I would write next to each item how many people might be interested in it, then decide how many servings you'd want of each. Now total it all up, and see how much food you have. In a party situation, I may not mind having a menu that equates to everyone having 2 servings of everything they like, but much more than that is too much IMHO. So my next cut would be, what stuff would be good leftover and what would be trashed and adjust accordingly. Food out all day in hot humid weather, may be a lot of waste.

Ahh.. I get where you are coming from. It is family tradition to send everyone home with leftovers-- well, those who eat leftovers (not all do). Taco/Fajita bar meats will not be out all day. They'll go home with the kids and I for salads, etc during the week.

Chips and dips will be out all day.. but they will be replaced as needed. We'll have backups for all the starters-- so they can be brought out intermittently/as needed. Also the margaritas and agua frescas (serving in large glass containers with spouts) will be replenished as needed.

I think a family gathering is a little different than a dinner party-- at least ours are. We always accommodate special diets, preferences and favorites-- a tradition my dad started for me (I don't eat ham.. didnt eat red meat for a long time). Not much goes to waste-- especially not now that the younger generation are now in their own homes and on budgets. If anything goes to waste, it's the desserts! No one wants to take tempting desserts home!

That said, I am open to reconsidering anything that seems like overkill or redundant. I think I've already decided to nix the shrimp cocktail. Still on the fence regarding Sopes... they are a fav of mine and such great one-to-two bite snacks!

ETA:

And thank you all! I hope i don't seem argumentative-- I am considering all you suggest! It has been very helpful!

Also going to be buying some serving dishes to supplement what I/we have-- feel free to share your favorites! (but it will be close to the pool -- so bonus points for melamine and armetale!)

I have never had sopes ... that picture is TDF! What a wonderful combination if flavors and textures.

The sopes look a little like panucho?

panucho

yucatan inspired bite of black bean purée + avocado on crispy tortilla shell w/ crisp salad of cabbage, pickled onion, spiced pepitas, serrano chile + cilantro

Everything sounds fabulous! Your mom is in for such a treat. And despite the "too much ado" attitude, I'm betting she will be tickled pink to have this party in her honor.

Yes, they look similar for sure! The base for sopes is thicker than a tortilla-- made from corn masa. It's firm but not as crispy.

My preferred topping is as you describe, Mtn.. but they can also have steak asada or chicken topping. The sopes I have had also have a dusting of cojita cheese on top.

Sooooo good.

I grew up with pralines being brought to the table at the end of a Mexican meal, so I'd probably make a batch. My favorite recipe is made with buttermilk and I don't know if that cooked is still a problem for lactose intolerance. The ever popular at every pot luck and get together Texas Sheet Cake is also called Mexican Sheet Cake in some circles because of the cinnamon added to the chocolate and it can be bakes in different shapes and the icing still poured over -- but that is also made with buttermilk. Fried ice cream balls were first seen at a Mexican restaurant, but that's a definite no....

What about something like a mango bundt cake - maybe served with some sliced strawberries?

My mother turned 90 this year. I had to miss her birthday party in April because of covid and bad health. She loves Mexican food. Given my circumstances I would hire a food truck and a live band...

Lascatx I have never had an issue with baked goods-- other than tres leches cake which I THINK is soaked in milk? or cream? I can't eat yogurt from the fridge but I use yogurt in my banana bread without an issue. Mom used to love pralines so that could be fun... and while I don't like chocolate, I know texas sheet cake is always popular.

Seagrass, sorry you had to miss your mother's birthday! I hope all are on the mend now!

I really prefer not to bake.. I may change my mind but I think my time and talents are better spent on salsas, salads and marinades. Also, I have important meetings the day before the party so I'd have to bake 2 days before or scramble. I need to think on it some more--

Thank you for all the wonderful suggestions!!