A saying carved in a headstone...

last year

My husband died a year ago. His death has left me in a state that I don't understand. Depressed, lonely, and trying to figure out how to move forward.

My mother died in 1985. But a year before she died she told me she didn't want to be buried with my father who was in a military cemetery. She loved where I lived as it was a beautiful area of NY with lots of woodlands and wildlife. There was a cemetery in our area which she loved. A neighbor of mine had died and she attended the funeral with us. While at the cemetery, she saw a deer, some rabbits and birds. She wanted to be buried in that cemetery. She arranged it and bought a grave that could bury 4 people plus unlimited cremations.

When she died suddenly, a year later she was buried there. I had to buy a headstone. My mother was Irish and I went to the library to find poems by Irish writers which seemed appropriate. I found one and had two lines carved in the headstone.

Since her death, my brother was buried there and now my husband.

The Irish poem doesn't fit, plus the poem takes up so much room on the headstone I don't have room to put everyone on the stone.

Sooo, I have to buy a new headstone. I'm trying to find a line which would fit everyone. A single line that could fit either man or women. I can't find a saying. It will be a large headstone for a double grave, and I really want something to express my love for my mother, brother and husband.

Eventually, I will be buried with them. My son who never married might also be buried there.

Sorry this is so long, its hard to describe, but I know someone here could help me find a line from a poem or saying that would be appropriate but also loving.

Jane

Featured Answer

janearcher59

last year

I think something simple like ” Forever in our Hearts” would be good

Comments (19)

seagrass_gw Cape Cod
last year
last modified: last year
Jane - I can't imagine the grief of losing my husband and am fortunate to still have my dear mother on this planet at age 90 and healthy. We have a family plot in a cemetery where my paternal grand parents are buried, a great uncle, my father and 3 of my brothers are buried - some of their graves are scattered around and when I go with my mother to put flags/flowers on their graves we are puzzled how to find them. They have no sentimental sayings on their gravestones. But my husband's parents were cremated and both are interred at the National Cemetery in Bourne, MA and their resting place is engraved with "How beautiful the dance".

Vermont is famous for it's granite headstones and you might look to some of the websites of their quarries. We toured some of the cemeteries in that state and marveled at the artful ways people said good-bye to loved ones.
jane__ny thanked seagrass_gw Cape Cod
carolb_w_fl_coastal_9b
last year
last modified: last year
When my mom's ashes were buried with my dad's at the veteran's cemetery here, we had 'Lives well lived' added to the stone.

Please accept my condolences for your loss as well.
jane__ny thanked carolb_w_fl_coastal_9b
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arcy_gw
last year
It's probably not what you want but I heard one yesterday that is in my head "We were you and one day you will be us". Its tough to be the one left. Well that's silly it's tough to lose people HARD STOP. Prayers.
jane__ny thanked arcy_gw
nicole___
last year
I'm so sorry for your loss and your pain. Be well.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Life Is Not Forever. Love Is.

Our/Their mission on Earth is fulfilled

The world is diminished because they are gone.

Step softly. Dreams lie buried here.
jane__ny thanked nicole___
smiling
last year
The Pain doesn't last forever but the Memories Do
jane__ny thanked smiling
katlan
last year
My dad died when he was only 60 years old. We were all heartbroken. My mom was just awful. When we finally got everything done she agonized over what to put on their headstone as well. My one sister came up with this line and that's what we used.

"Our gift was Love"

I'm sorry for all the loss you have suffered and the gut wrenching grief that goes with losing someone you love so much. God bless their souls.
Annie Deighnaugh
last year
I'm so sorry for all your grief and suffering.

Life is not forever. Love is.

Those we love don't go away.

They walk beside us every day.

We only part to meet again.

Sleep on now and take your rest. Matthew 26:45

In the arms of the angels.
dedtired
last year
Jane, I am so, so sorry for your loss and your pain.

My father married a woman who was much younger than he was. He died at age 85 and she died at 55. Their headstone has a picture of their dog ( a Doberman) and says “It was great while it lasted.” I personally think its stupid but everyone else seems to think its a riot.

I know the right words come along for your family.
eld6161
last year
last modified: last year
I am adapting this as it should go for more than one person.

To the world they were one

To us, they were the world
Uptown Gal
last year
I am sorry for your loss and sadness. I have gone through that too. We put

a short line of one of the things he always said to make us smile, when he

came home from anywhere. It still makes me smile when I see it at the

grave site. My memory can still "hear" his voice saying it, and I think, "he is home".
maggie200
last year
Jane, dear woman! did you find any on here you liked? i like the eld 6161..

To the world they were one

To us, they were the world
sephia_wa
last year
last modified: last year
Have you googled headstone sayings? There are lots of resources that may give you ideas.

Here's what I found after a quick search:
jane__ny thanked sephia_wa
Jasdip
last year
Jane, I'm so sorry! (((Jane)))

When Mom died, at the bottom of her obituary I wrote,

"don't be sad that I'm gone; be glad that I was here"
jane__ny thanked Jasdip
jane__ny
Original Author
last year
https://youtu.be/bpwdwbO1uvM
Sea grass your post made me think of this song by Garth Brooks. Maybe a line from it?
Thanks everyone. Gave me a lot of thoughts. So depressing.
Jane
Elizabeth
last year
Love is eternal

( Abraham Lincoln )
jane__ny thanked Elizabeth
Elmer J Fudd
last year
Jane, I share the thoughts of others wishing you well in dealing with your loss and I've said so before. I suspect dealing with this particular task is not a plus to help you put happier thoughts on the table to help you move forward from whatever period of acute mourning is right for you. I hope you can do what's necessary to find happier days.
yeonassky
last year
So sorry for your losses. I'm sure your memories are very fresh and no wonder it is taking time to figure things out. Hugs to you.

See you soon! I saw it on a gravestone beside the Stone next to it that said Honey I'm home.

You could do something simple like carving of a lit candle. Something to light your way.

There are so many individual ideas. I saw a carving of a tree with a ribbon on it on one gravestone. I guess it is something to do with the Tie A Yellow Ribbon Around The Old Oak Tree song. I think you will find the perfect thing to commemorate your loved ones.
Ninapearl
last year
jane, i'm deeply sorry for your loss. my husband died almost 15 years ago and i still struggle every day.

death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves the memories no one can steal.

wishing you peace as you navigate this time in your life. i wish i had some profound words that could make it better but in reality, there aren't any. your loss is still very fresh, i know how hard it is to be grieving while you watch the rest of the world go on with life. sending you comforting hugs. 💓

A saying carved in a headstone...

janearcher59

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seagrass_gw Cape Cod

carolb_w_fl_coastal_9b

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