I'd be tempted to try painting the walls man cave first. I think it could look stunning with your cabinets and go a long way toward making your kitchen look sleek. If you have the $$ for it, I'd consider changing out your countertops to something less yellow. If you find a laminate you like in stock at a big box store you can change out the counter yourself for just a couple hundred dollars - and it's easier than painting the cabinets. While you have the countertop off, maybe put up a new backsplash behind the sink - something high contrast with both lights and darks in it. And ... voila! New kitchen!

I find it difficult to visualize another colour when the current one works but here goes... One option would be a warm ivory, pale pale yellow. Dial down the current colour a few notches. Another could be a terra cotta, burnt orange type colour. Dial up the gold a few notches. Not sure how that would fare next to the red in your kitchen though. Sorry I don't have actual paint manufacturers names and colours for these two options. Just took these pics from a House Beautiful book. I also thought a browny-pink could work. Very pale, too much yellow or grey in it to read pink. Something like Farrow & Ball's Pink Ground or Benjamin Moore's Silky Smooth. (On my screen, that's how they look. Might be very different in your space, with your lighting.) Depends on what direction you were thinking of going and how saturated you want your walls. Have you been checking out paint strips in the store? See what appeals to you there (blue? white?) and bring them home and see how they look in your space. Some will be a definite no, others might have promise.

Buy new cabinets. Or spend 6 months sanding it all to bare wood and then finding out that the pickling stain is too far deep into the wood to be able to change colors. Or pick another look. Like opaque painted.

Hi @Danielle Smith, changing the wall paint and the backsplash will give you a more balanced and beautiful space. I know you don’t want to do the backsplash - I get it but reconsider! It will transform the space, and painting it will not. Do you have any inspiration images? If not, start googling images of kitchens with your materials. I think SW Alabaster for the walls but wondering which color white for the trim? I want to make the space look bigger. A warm white is best. A warm white can be lovely - Alabaster is a little yellow. If you want something a little more neutral, consider SW 7000 Ibis White. It will look great with your cabinets. Should the brick fireplace also be painted alabaster or something for contrast/ to match the kitchen cabinets? Suggestions? The brick is fine for now, but you could use a more refined mantel. You can build or buy a mantel cap that covers the one you have. I think white for the kitchen cabinets is overkill so looking for a warm light grey/ taupe – any SW color recommendations/ compatible with Alabaster? Or is white better to deal with the black countertops? Leave the cabinets alone for now. They seem fine. If we were to have the backsplash repainted any color suggestions there? Replace if you can. We are having the floors refinished and they can be slightly whitewashed – better to keep the natural Canadian maple or make lighter? Natural maple.