I'm in So. Cal. and things are changing on a frequent basis. Right now I think there is a "no gathering from multiple households" in effect in much of the state. My mom is 20 minutes away and while we had a brief Thanksgiving spaced in the yard with the three of us, we're going to skip Christmas together. 2020 sucks "donkey". It just is what it is.

I'm sure many will chime in with similar and opposing opinions. But I suggest if you think that the government telling you how to live your life is wrong, than you should stop wearing your seatbelt. That is all.

Well, it's all pretty clear as mud here in CA on these things. In my county, also in Nor Cal but a different county, we are on lockdown. We are a tourist destination and vacation rental homes are shutdown until at least early Jan 2021. If you call the rental owner and or the county it is located in, you will find your answer. I know that earlier this year, when we were on lockdown, visitors renting Airbnb were fined, as well as the property owners, so it's probably worth a call.

You sound like you'd be a sensible renter, but I think the fines in our county were $1000/day!

I would not go.

While not identical to your situation, we opted to cancel our much-anticipated trip to hike in NM in October when that state imposed a strict 14-day quarantine order for out-of-state visitors. We had booked an Airbnb, and the owner (while not coming right out and saying as much) made it quite clear that he was more than willing to accept us as guests in spite of the governor's mandate. We spoke by phone and when I expressed my misgivings about keeping our plans, he "assured" me that there were many visitors still arriving daily from Texas and everyone was friendly and welcoming of them in the streets, shops, etc. In spite of his spin, we elected not to flout the law and canceled our trip. For one thing, we wouldn't have felt right about driving through the state with our Texas license plates, particularly after reading that not everyone was indeed happy to welcome visitors with open arms. We envisioned keyed paint or slashed tires or worse, so no ... this was one trip that could wait until another time.

I fully understand that you don't want your daughter to be alone, but if I may be so bold, there are countless who are in the exact same boat, and they aren't gathering. What would happen if one of you became ill while at the Airbnb and had to take a hospital bed that might have been used for a resident needing it, had you not been there? That's the sort of thing I thought about when arriving at our "no NM" decision a couple of months ago.

I was going to suggest calling or emailing the owner as well. Our DD and her DH have an Airbnb in Truckee. They canceled all the reservations they have on the books right now because they just thought it was the right thing to do. Unbelievably, Airbnb gave them a hard time, even threatening to revoke their 'superhost' status. But they held firm, really believing that it is the only responsible thing to do.

I have contacted the Airbnb owner, who assures me that there is no problem, but I'm not so sure.

I think that I will contact the County/City where the Airbnb is to find out what the rules there are.

Spanish, I agree with you: I'm sure many will chime in with similar and opposing opinions. But I suggest if you think that the government telling you how to live your life is wrong, than you should stop wearing your seatbelt. That is all.

Octotillo - I fully understand that you don't want your daughter to be alone, but if I may be so bold, there are countless who are in the exact same boat, and they aren't gathering. What would happen if one of you became ill while at the Airbnb and had to take a hospital bed that might have been used for a resident needing it, had you not been there? That's the sort of thing I thought about when arriving at our "no NM" decision a couple of months ago.

Yes, that's my thinking too.

I told my daughter that we will be leaving our Christmas tree up until she can travel up here if we aren't able to meet for Christmas.

I remember the first time I was home alone for Christmas in early 30's. My parents had divorced and for some reason I wasn't able to join my mom/sister for the holidays. It was pouring rain - I'll never forget because that was unusual for So Cal - and I went to the movies with some girlfriends. At the time I knew I didn't want to miss out on the festivities on a regular basis, but somehow it was kind of "adult". I'm weird, so it's quite possible no other person on earth would have the same thought. Perhaps substitute the word "probable" for "possible"! heeheehee

I'm so sorry you all are in this position Terri. It's hard on so many families.

It’s not only the fact that you have a house to stay in while you are together. Check how full the hospitals are in the area in case one of you need care, think about what happens if there is car trouble while traveling, consider the need for using a bathroom while in route. I really wish “stay home” would be a law over Christmas instead of a suggestion. I’m sorry that any of this even has to be considered.

This is the way I see it. I may have missed some nuances but here goes.

Your daughter basically lives in quarantine.

You basically live in quarantine.

You have a relatively short drive so you won't be exposed to others for an extended time while traveling.

As far as you can tell, using the Airbnb does not break any rules.

You will all be quarantined when you get to the house.

The risk I see is an illness, accident or mechanical issue which causes you or your daughter to have to interact with others for an extended period. This could happen on your trip. This could also happen in your home grocery store parking lots.

If travel to the area is banned, I would obviously say you shouldn't go. But the situation is not so cut and dry.

Even if the state or county are not restrictive, I personally wouldn't risk getting together.

My husband and I have both stayed home the last several weeks EXCEPT for trips to the grocery store. We both work from home right now and haven't seen anyone or done anything outside the house but for that weekly grocery shop. Somehow we both have ended up with Covid. If we had attended Thanksgiving with anyone else, it's possible we would have been contagious at the time and wouldn't have known it.

Bluebell, how are you both feeling? It must be so frustrating to have been so careful and still end up getting sick.

No debate or doubt I would be there and open the door as my daughter arrived.

No debate or doubt I would be there and open the door as my daughter arrived.

Not surprising. However, I actually care about doing the responsible thing for my fellow citizens.

And most of us believe the scientific and medical communities, not our own non-professional assumptions.

If you have fuel and a toilet to get there and back without visiting anything, you're probably within the spirit of most of the order.

Don't do it. It's not safe for either of you. What if the passes close due to snow? You're both subject to weather delays.

Deegw, we are doing ok, thank you for asking. We both have what feels like really bad cold symptoms - hopefully that's all we will deal with. We are on day 9 now of feeling crummy. I just lost taste and smell today, which is a really weird sensation. Yes, I am sooo frustrated and disappointed after everything we have done to prevent it.

In the big scheme of things it’s a small sacrifice for you all to stay home for Christmas this one time. And life’s difficulties and sacrifices make us stronger and more resilient for whatever greater challenges we might face in the future.

Bluebell66, today my husband's doc told him that to him it seems like the people who have been most careful are the ones getting it. Go figure.

I'm going to be the naysayer here. The rules are for everyone, and you don't have any reason to say they don't apply to you. Set a good example, stay home, and plan for the visit after the Christmas surge dies down, or after the vaccine becomes widely available.

We have followed all protocols enacted in our state and, when applicable, in Maine. But they have not been onerous in our particular case.

If you are looking for an opinion, I will be brave and go against the crowd here and say, if it is not disallowed, I think it is fine based on the facts as you have related them.

It is definitely disallowed. But there's no enforcement.

Also, up people don't want germy Angelenos to visit right now, even if they think they're uninfected. LA has really been slammed. :) The only worse places are the ones between there and Santa Cruz.

Oh...if you do decide to go through with it, make sure the reservation is in your daughter's name because this part could really really suck!:

"Except as otherwise required by law, no hotel or lodging entity in California shall accept or honor out of state reservations for non-essential travel, unless the reservation is for at least the minimum time period required for quarantine and the persons identified in the reservation will quarantine in the hotel or lodging entity until after that time period has expired."

from https://www.cdph.ca.gov/Programs/CID/DCDC/Pages/COVID-19/Regional-Stay-at-Home-Order-.aspx

(Can you tell I've been trying to avoid visitors this season? Does it show?)

We have decided to cancel the Airbnb. Our daughter will come up here for an extended visit when it's safe to do so.

We had a pretty teary phone conversation about it this evening, but I know that it's the right thing to do. Besides, I'd much rather have her here for several weeks than just 4 days in Santa Cruz. 😊

Oh dear, sorry to hear it is not allowed. : ( It's probably for the best then. Who knows, maybe put a tree up when she does come? : )

I already told her that we are leaving the tree up (it's artificial) until she can be here with us.

If everyone were as responsible as you are being, we would not be in the mess we are in. Thank you for doing the right thing. Better to miss one Christmas together, than ALL future Christmases because you didn't do the responsible thing.

These decisions are hard ones, I know. Thank you for caring about others in such a demonstrable way.

It is sad but I do believe you made a good decision terri.

I always imagine how one of my loved ones would feel if we would meet up, someone became seriously ill, and they find out that they were the carrier.

My best friend's family is just coming out of a super spreader Thanksgiving event, where her asymtomatic niece infected all of her sister's extended family, her 82 year old mother and her other sister who cares for the mother. They supposedly were "being careful" but had some unmasked time inside due to it being so cold outside. So you can't be too careful.

As for visiting, can you get tested and quarantine ahead of time? This is some new advice coming out of the CDC now due to more testing being available. So a visit involves quarantine and then testing before a visit, with quarantine and testing after. New guidelines on this are shorter than 14 asymptomatic days. I think seven is the new suggested quarantine time if testing is part of the regime. 7 days of quarantine after a negative test and you should be able to feel confident that AT THAT POINT IN TIME you are virus free. Any exposure to anyone changes that assumption.

From CDC Web site: https://www.cdc.gov/coronavirus/2019-ncov/travelers/travel-during-covid19.html

"If you are traveling, consider getting tested with a viral test 1-3 days before your trip. Also consider getting tested with a viral test 3-5 days after your trip and reduce non-essential activities
for a full 7 days after travel, even if your test is negative. If you
don’t get tested, consider reducing non-essential activities for 10 days
after travel.

• Keep a copy of your test results with you during travel; you may be asked for them.
• Do not travel if you test positive; immediately isolate yourself, and follow public health recommendations.

Bless your heart Terri! I hope you are able to see her soon. ((hugs))

Good for you and thank you for demonstrating responsibility. The right thing is often not the easy thing.

Gov. Newsom just activated the CA "mass fatality program" due to the skyrocketing number of hospitalizations and deaths. There are only 100 remaining ICU beds in my Los Angeles area (1.7% ICU capacity for the entire Southern CA region) and nurses have been told they are in "disaster mode." The seriousness of this situation cannot be overstated.

In nearby Newport Beach, they are protesting lockdowns......

. https://www.kron4.com/news/california/live-soon-newsom-gives-coronavirus-update/