Did he offer you a generous severance or termination of employment bonus to show you his appreciation?

You committed to work until today. The transaction fell through, that's his problem.

Quit and don't go back. You owe him nothing.

Good luck finding your way to the right decision for you.

So he's going on vacation anyway? Seems to me as tho he should be cancelling plans and trying to get things worked out. If he did that, I would say he's doing his part and could understand you sticking around a little longer to help. But he's not, he's going to kick back and enjoy his week, leaving you with the mess. Not acceptable!

I missed that. He gives himself vacations, just not you. And he wants you to stay on to mind the office during his vacation. What a dog.

I agree with Elmer. Did the boss offer you any sort of package - severance of bonus? Or just a "bye?" And like Mystical Manns said. He should be cancelling his own vacation to deal with the situation. Not expecting you to stick around after you'd given your notice.

You don't want to be there. You had already made plans for when you leave - honing your business skills and taking some additional training. Go! Don't jeopardize your own future. You said you aren't the type of person to walk out on a job or a commitment. Your commitment to this job is over today - 2/28/20.

Whoa...everyone knew today was your last day, you are not walking out on a commitment. Until you told him you would stay another week.

I would be out the door.

That's right. two...you said you hadn't had a vacation in 4 years!

PS -

I've never heard of financing falling through the day before a scheduled sale of business close day. Or the day before a scheduled close day for the sale of anything. That gets lenders sued because it's too late to line up another source.

Someone's telling a fib, a lie. Could be the wannabee buyer, could be your boss because the sale fell through some time ago but he wanted to go on vacation and trap you into watching the store. I'll bet it's the boss.

Run.

Agree. And promises to help made when you are being used and manipulated don't count.

I can only imagine your frustration. The first red flag is the ‘sudden’ change in the buyer’s financing situation. The second is that your boss went on vacation, leaving you there. It was a setup. And you haven’t had a vacation in 4 Years? I would immediately type up my resignation, demand pay for 4 years of a week’s paid vacation per year, plus the week you stayed over unplanned, make a copy and send it to my attorney, and walk out the door next week as planned.

You have been more than accommodating and it’s time to go on with your life and leave the crematorium and that boss behind.

I also recall you saying you don't have paid vacation time, no benefits - for 22 years, that one time you put in for 64 hours of time and he paid you 80, he doesn't tell you what commissions/files you're paid for and that you have to rely on him to be honest. He then wanted it all paid back at once. You've also made comments about there have been some things he's wanted you to do that made you uncomfortable. You'd also said you'd taken a 35% pay decrease with your current job.

C'mon, the obvious can't be more obvious. Don't give this guy another second of your time. But if you feel you must, negotiate a bigly amount of $$ for one more week. You'd already made today your last day, so you're free to negotiate whatever salary you want. Make it worth YOUR while.

Get your money in advance!

I'm guessing that the phone call the boss received was a personal call that had nothing to do with his buyer or the buyer's financing. He has known for a while that the sale wasn't going to go through, but he didn't want to cancel his vacation, so he figured that he would spring this on you on your final day, so that you would agree to stay on to "help out." That phone call was likely prearranged -- a friend was told to call him at a specific time so that he could act like he just found out about "his buyer's bad news."

Get out while you can.

I hate to say it but I agree with Lindsey and Elmer, I think you are being played! The whole thing sounds like a bunch of hooey!

As I read the comments, each one made sense to me. I only recall the thread about being elated to leave a job. I didn't know or don't recall that you haven't had a vacation in so many years or that you did not get benefits ( I am reading this quickly so maybe not the most accurate).

I thought it was really bizarre that the financing falls through at the last minute. I mean, I get that stuff happens but for all the planning and stipulations to be revealed at the last minute, doesn't ring true.

Then I read about Boss man is leaving for vacation and oh my it's now on you?!?!?!

At first I was thinking you should just leave anyway as was well planned. Then I thought well, maybe stay the extra week. That still may be what you do, but honestly, it had not registered to my brain that you would stay the extra week because your boss -- you know the OWNER --is going on a vacation.

As we used to say Not your circus; not your monkeys. Too bad so sad.

Just stop now. This is crazy and you’re allowing yourself to be taken advantage of. He’s going on vacation. Your last day was yesterday. D.O.N.E.

Call him and say ‘something came up’ and you can’t stay on after all!!!!! It will feel great.

You have been working for a manipulator who has you wrapped around his little finger. You didn't even take a break to think about it. I have no suggestions for you and I know this sounds harsh but take heed.

sounds to me like Boss should cancel,his vacation since things are not going as planned. If he isn’t willing to pitch in, why should you? If you want to be an extra nice person and cover while he goes away for a week, then stay on. You May need a reference from him some day so you want to leave on a high note. After one week, I’d be out of there. You have a plan, so stick with it. You owe him nothing. Good luck.

agree with everyone - RUN! and something sounds fishy, but not your problem!!

if u feel obligated to stay the week, then stay. after that, he's on his own. trust me, you will feel liberated and FREE!!!!!

enjoy your time off!!!

You May need a reference from him some day

If he is a manipulator he will use that reference as a chokehold to keep you there as long as he wants.

References are not what they once were. Employers are very limited in what they can now actually say.

Both my millennial DD’s have changed jobs and a few times didn’t need a reference.

Interviews go from resume, to FaceTime, to an actual interview then sometimes even to a group interview. In other words, these companies are relying on what they think of the potential employee not a previous employer.

This may be tricky because (as I commented in an earlier thread on this situation) staying in a job with an abusive boss may reflect more negatively than positively on the employee no matter what. It's hard to put a good spin on.

If it were me in this situation, I'd have a story ready about "I took and kept the job because I needed the money", explain the toxic situation, and don't even consider having letter of reference. That should be enough, especially because of the nature of the employment (small insurance sales business) .

I've watched too many movies, but my mind goes to, "Is Monday the day he expects the FBI (or some kind of state regulatory agency) to show up, or something?"

No, don't explain the toxic situation to a prospective new boss. Someone who does that to a person they want to hire them looks like they are involved in drama, or can't get along with people. I've participated in lots of interviews over the years, and when someone goes off about their previous job or boss, we'd just thank them for coming in, and move to the next candidate. Unless it's a really specialized field or skill, there's lots of people to interview.

What sephia said. That was my experience when serving on interview committees as well. Potential employees who gave the impression that they were a drama lamas never got past the first interview. Better to say something like "I'm looking for new challenges" or the potential for growth, a new career path or something along those lines.

My shorthand comment was misleading, sorry. In response to "why no letter of reference", you'd say "he was a hard person to get along with and I didn't ask for one".

Dawn, I did a lot of hiring and interviewing over the years. If someone tried to duck a question by responding with a kind of euphemism or double-talk like "looking for a new challenge", I'd probe further. If no better response to a second ping, I'd figure the person was hiding something and that put them into the "No" category for me. We'd always have three or more people interview each candidate and whether it was that or something else, job applicants who were evasive to one person were often evasive to others too (if even about something else) and the thumbs down reaction would rarely involve just one person.

If you don't have a financial stake in this operation which you don't. you need to get out of there.

I would be leery of being tied up in this financial mess because, you know, if you've been there for those many years and were around during the sale, then you had to know something was fishy. Someone may be thinking that.

You really need to get out.

Where is two25acres? She started this post on Fri and lots of people have responded. Nothing from her after her initial post.

I did a lot of interviewing and hiring as well.

Personally, I'd rather someone give me a vague "looking for more challenges" than tell me about how their former boss was having an affair with his secretary and no one could get promoted unless the secretary approved and then one day the boss's wife marched into the office and made a big scene about the boss and the secretary and then started screaming at all of the employees who knew about it and didn't let her know and then the wife started trashing the office resulting in the police being called.

True story. The person who spilled the beans came highly recommended and the interview committee couldn't end that interview fast enough. I suspect the higher ups who gave this person a great recommendation did it so they could get rid of an employee who loved drama, wasn't very discreet and didn't exercise good judgment.

Other's may have had different experiences which is perfectly valid; my opinion is based on my experiences which are just as valid. There is no one size fits all.

We each bring along our own backgrounds as you say, dawn, and maybe this is an example that well demonstrates differences.

I was in a professional practice where absolute confidentiality, honesty, integrity, and truthfulness were expected of everyone at all times. No wiggle room.

One tactic in interviewing was to find resume vagueries about which (legally permitted) questions could be asked to get more specifics and to test an applicant's truthfulness. They were often the soft parts of the person's background. With practice one can get good at finding such things and more often than not, it was enlightening. Not the withheld information, but rather the applicant's reaction to being asked to be more specific about factual matters. If it was something as you described, I myself would have stopped them before they got too far, or uncomfortable, by saying the details didn't matter. What mattered to me was the effort to answer my follow-up question honestly.

I agree with everyone who says it’s time to move on. Didn’t you post a thread a week or so ago about how he wanted you to do something that you knew was wrong so you refused? Now the “financing” has fallen through? He’s probably lying but irregardless, whatever happened doesn’t really matter, the bottom line is that he needs to keep the doors open while he’s on vacation and he needs your help to do that. So what are you getting in return for helping him out? IMO, it’s only fair that he makes it worth your while by doubling your salary (so you get a paid vacation too) and there is nothing wrong with telling him that. If he’s not willing to pay the extra week for you to stay, then you really shouldn’t stay. The bottom line is that the business is his responsibility, not yours. He can choose to either cancel his vacation, pay the additional costs for you to stay or close the doors for the week while he’s gone. It’s really that simple.

As for the reference, you have 22 years on the job and are only leaving because of the changes in ownership, that pretty much speaks for itself.

Well, it's Monday morning. I tend to see the world thru "rose colored glasses", so can imagine a few positive reasons why helping/working one more week is a good and right thing to do. Who knows for sure. Just hope you are feeling okay and have a good "final final" week, two25acres :-)

Yes, where is two25acres? Are you at work today?

It's Monday and yes, I'm here. I made that commitment to him and I will see it out. It was very difficult coming in here but I did and I will use this time this week for me. I wanted to hone up on some of my job skills and I will be able to do that.

As for some of the feedback I'm hearing. For the financing, I've seen this happen only once in the past. Personally from what I have been hearing from the prospective buyer while he was in the office he was throwing out production projections of his licensed producers (what I do) that made no sense. They were beyond what I have produced at my best time with a book of business 3 times the size of this one. My guess is that he won't qualify no matter what unless he throws in some cash to offset the loan amount. When a prospective buyer signs on with this company they are required to have 100k in funds available to them for anything and everything that will come up and salaries. If he takes some of that to fund the loan he wont have the required funds. When this all fell through I asked the seller/my boss if he had a contingency written in the purchase contract for this. I also asked him if he was going to open the sale of the book to others, not just wait for this guy. His answers kind of surprised me, he didn't know if there was something in the contract nor did he know if he should open the sale up. Those are things I would have made sure happened. We were literally hours from being shut down. We have a lot of personal and financial information at our finger tips, because of that there is a lot of security to work on our systems. When an agent leaves he is shut out of everything.

Yes, he assumed I would just take over this week. My fault as I've allowed it in the past. It frustrates me yes, but I'm a loyal and responsible employee. Always have been. Some people appreciate that. His manager does and as a result he (the manager) has given me opportunities to further my education within this business. I can take that education with me so for that I'm appreciative. As for severance. Gratification. This man doesn't know what that is. I've know that about him and the way I see it, what goes around will come around. That's both sides of this coin. Letter of recommendation, I've been using some in the interview process. Some prospective employers look at them, some don't. I asked him for one - his response was he's not good at letter writing. Go ahead and make one up and I'll sign it. Well, that has it's pros and cons. I wrote myself a good one though and I have it in my possession. As for his vacation, he wont be here and that is a real blessing. I will take advantage of that time and work it for betterment to my skills. The timing is actually good for me to stay a bit longer. Hubby was supposed to be on the road for the first 2 weeks of this month but the hockey team he drives (motorcoach bus) won the first round of their playoffs and have home ice for the next round. They are in Alaska so they don't require him. He can be home resting and I will work. It's a win win for the short term.

I will continue to look for my new job and continue to learn more about this buying/selling process as I may be a part of it in the future - different agency. I could have purchased this one but it's an old book, not very large and unfortunately a good percentage is of a nationality that won't speak to me and will only work with the part timer we have in this office. My experience tells me that portion of the book (12%) will leave upon the sale when that part timer is no longer working here but perhaps elsewhere.

Thank you for all of the feedback.

It sounds like you've given this a lot of thought and with your experience with the agency and the people who run it/work there have come to some pretty good decisions that work for you.

Have a good week and I hope you wind up in an agency that offers you challenges (good ones), great compensation and respect.

Your future looks bright! Concentrate on getting through the week....and I wish YOU the best!

And when the week is done I really hope you LEAVE.

Not your circus not your monkeys. To repeat my thoughts.

As I lukki pointed out, if you have been there 22 years (??) and he can't put together a recommendation letter, don't worry about it. I know when I would interview people if they had longevity somewhere that spoke volumes.

Sorry but this is a shocking decision, based on what you've said in this and the other thread.

Not sure what you think is shocking. It's business. A very large corporation. Not everything is perfect. Agents come and go because they don't know what they are doing. They haven't put the time in as I have to get what they want. They come in and think they are going to make money and not have to do much. That's a problem with people, not the company or product. I've put allot of time into this career, I am trying to make it work for me. I know the products, the policies, who to call for what. What's involved to be a success. I've learned from current agent what doesn't work. Previous agents taught me what does work. There's also jobs within the company, maybe not necessarily in the agencies.

I have many many customers that I've known for years. I have built relationships and now those are expanding to their kids and grand kids. I take my decision very seriously. Yes, I know that people can and do take advantage and my fault for some of that but at the same time the higher ups are well aware that I'm still here helping to keep things going.

I'm frustrated by all of this but I can also see that there is a reason for it. I may not know what that is right away but I will and I'm ok with that. I can vent my frustrations, admit my faults and recognize the possibilities and while putting it to people here I can get advice, hear other peoples thoughts but ultimately make the decision that works best for me. It's not easy but then again, the job hunt hasn't been easy either. I'm 58, live in a small town with my education coming from the school of hard knocks. I've been knocked down but with support I get back up, I may trip and stumble but I will get what I want.

Thank you everyone for your time and feedback.

It’s shocking because a few days ago (and in earlier posts) you were elated to be leaving.

Career advice from a Billionaire Oprah Winfrey

She says there are no wrong paths....no failures....there may be a detour....

And if the circumstances were different I would still be elated. I would have preferred things stayed the way they were headed but things happen and I have decided to roll with the punches. For me, that is actually saying something because I don't always handle change well. When this gets back on track and I have my last day here for real, I will probably be more elated but satisfied that I did what I could for everyone concerned - myself included. Who knows, this may open a door I wasn't anticipating. Will it remain difficult for me to come back daily, you bet but the next few days I will spend on me when I'm not taking care of customers.

It's shocking for what Elmer and maddielee said, and for all the things you've written about in the past.

It's a form of abuse. Your boss didn't treat you well, didn't pay you well (reduced your salary by 35%), didn't give you any benefits, didn't give you paid vac. Who knows what else. You wrote about these things. And expressed elation about leaving.

Now you're defending your decision to stay, citing "loyalty."

You won't understand this because you're caught up in this abuse cycle. Abuse takes many forms. It's just not yelling, physical, etc. It's allowing someone to treat you poorly, and then you make up excuses for it to defend allowing it to continue.

You're allowing this because it's what you know and are comfortable with.

Sorry nicole. To me, Oprah's words would be more suitable coming from a pulpit at a religious meeting where people are looking for otherwise unsupported beliefs and "wishing it makes it happen" thoughts, all accepted blindly.

Destiny and fate are forces to consider? No wrong decisions? No failures? No wrong paths?

There is wrong advice, her words are an example for me.

Yes sephia, exactly. Abuse accepted repeatedly with rationalizations is exactly what I see. I wasn't going to say more but you let the cat out of the bag and I'm glad you did.

Elmer......a LOT of people are "done" at age 50. Two has complained of her job and how she's been treated before, years ago. Some people are not going to believe-in-themselves and strike out on their own, confident they will succeed. Some will just get by in life. Some will not excel, or out-perform. They just want someone to listen, to be heard....while they tread water.....stay afloat. Not drowning is a goal for some.

Abuse is a very strong word and having been beaten and strangled almost to death, I get abuse. You don't have to tell me about it. Physical, mental etc. This is my decision and I stand behind it. Not everyone will agree and that's ok. Isn't that what this forum is all about. I enjoy the feedback, the suggestions and the opinions even if we don't agree. I'm ok with that. I can walk out the door with my head up knowing I fought the fight and am a better person for it.

This agent didn't decrease my salary. I came from another agent that let me go because he could no longer afford me. This agent paid me what he paid me and I accepted it know that it wasn't his agency that would take me to retirement but he is a 42 year agent with a ton of knowledge in the insurance business and I knew I could learn more from him. I've also learned what not to do where running the business is concerned.

My elation is around the corner, I just don't know when it will be but I am working towards it. Everyone have a pleasant evening and thank you for all the input.

Good. While I think you haven't made good choices, I'm glad you accept (without agreeing to) other views. Best wishes.

Two25acres, I believe that you are doing what you are able to live with. It's important that you can wake up in the morning and look yourself in the eye. I totally get that and understand you simply needed a place to vent and a sounding board. Appreciate the advice but do what you think is right for you 😊. Good luck!!!

I'm with you. I understand two. You know what's good for you. And living your life is what you need to do.