The tone conveyed by THE STATEMENT IN ALL CAPS tells me "his house" will never become "our house". Just saying.

No it’s going to our house but he thinks the oak is something that never goes out of style.

So you realize and approve that because it used to be HIS house but now he will let you call it OUR house, that he still intends to make ALL the decisions regarding his house?

What’s the question? Pics may help. What do you plan on doing?

Have you searched this forum for advice on honey oak trim? Plenty of posts on the subject. Just because it's not currently in style doesn't make it cursed. :) You need flooring ideas?

Can you please try and attach pics in the comments' section? we can't see them..forum's been glitchy lately

Agree also-need to understand more what are your plans/wishlists are

BTW wood is coming back. Maybe not honey oak per se, but if trends interest you..just somethig to know

Also, there is honey oak, and there is honey oak. Maybe your trim is very attractive. And suits the overall style of the house. Or maybe it doesn't. Need to know more.

In short..pics and more details would be really helpful.

Advice on colors not for paint but more accent. I’m painting a dresser for the bedroom and I would like some tips on that too please. I don’t like dark.

Pictures issue is indeed very frustrating here lately, I hope Houzz works on it..meanwhile can you please try and upload again? Some say save to idea book and then attach as "Houzz photo" helps

Okay I hope these send

Men in general do tend to like wood finishes.

Honey oak looks a lot better when paired with the right colors; Maroon and Hunter Green are not among them!

It needs to be surrounded by lightness. Avoid yellows, tans, golds, and browns (except real wood flooring.) So walls and backsplashes in whites, off-whites (carefully chosen) and creams; Blues and greens, eve a few grays, work if they are the right blue or green or gray - warm not cool shades.

Look at upgrading the lighting also - if you can, replace with 3000K LEDs - bulbs if not able to change or upgrade fixtures.

Don't go very dark on the floors, either.

From my own experience it’s tough to move into someone’s house and make it your own. Even if married - the patterns of whose house it is before marriage tend to be hard to change. It may be good to make plans to find a new place together you both like. that would be my advice- leave the oak alone and start interviewing realtors.

So the piece of furniture for bed room I’m going to paint should be maybe a gray with green/blue undertone?

If it was up to me it would be palm print and jewel tones

I have oak cabinets - but white trim. One way to brighten homes with a lot of wood is to use a lot of white / cream. If you are not wanting brightness, but maybe more calm feeling - try sages or gray/ greens.

Here is my wood kitchens idea book with both new and older, refreshed wood kitchens:

https://www.houzz.com/ideabooks/75202366/list/wood-kitchens

While the door style you may be dealing with might be off trend, warm woods are returning in style. Without pics it is hard to advise, but you may be able to get new doors or countertops to freshen the space up. However, don't spend anything on a poor layout - save for new kitchen - and it can be wood but suit you both. In fact oak is back in style, but now it is white oak with a different cut. I often see it combined with white uppers for a pretty kitchen, and with stained lowers, it often wears a little better then all white. Some examples in my idea book.

EVERYONE THAT IS COMMENTING ON MY LIVING ARRANGEMENTS MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS! IM NOT IN A CHAT ROOM ASKING FOR YOUR LOVE ADVICE.

The flooring and the wallpaper are the problem. Up until HGTV started cursing oak it was not a problem. It is STILL not a problem. We have two homes....one with white cabinets and all white trim, and one with oak cabinets and trim. I much prefer the oak trim.

Light colored wood floors throughout will be fabulous ( when the budget allows). Our oak kitchen is painted SW Practical Beige, and it is a great neutral. Almost any accent color works well...please no gray!

But most importantly do not feel that your home has to look like everyone else's. TV makes so many people think that they must have white trim. Look at inspiration pictures and see how lovely " oak" homes can look.

raee wrote what I was going to. Including the floors color.

I actually like window frame and doors, wouldn't paint these either

Kitchen will still stay same kitchen even after tons of money'/effort and time having it correctly painted. And I don't see anything too wrong with it either, if it's functional for you-strip the wallpaper, change the lighting..maybe hardware..backsplash is something to be considered-one can have fun with that..different bigger rug? will feel much more like yours

then you'll see how it goes and will remodel so you both like it, when the timing is right and you know more about the house and how it works for you. If it still going to be same house, Life has a way of changing things-I'm on my 4 th forever house minimum,.,tired to count lol

Hard to give advice about colors in a vacuum..what's the other furbiture in the bedroom? what are your favorite colors? what's your preferred style?

Its a bed and one of those huge old old dated dressers. Until I can get the dresser done. It’s a small room so we are downsizing furniture! My favorite colors are teals, golds and greens.

I really don't think the oak trim is that bad. From the pictures, the color and quality of it look relatively good. Like others, your big problems are the carpet and wallpaper. Yikes. Paint and floors will make a world of difference.

I think the blue in grapefruit1's first pick is really nice with the oak! Kind of a teal blue, not too dark.

The yellow/tan walls in the third pic works because of the pale hue, the big windows, white trim and light accessories. Most of the time I see pics of tan with honey oak that just looks blah.

Even though you prefer golds and jewel tones in other contexts, they would likely rub you the wrong way paired with honey oak. Neither would look right.

Look how pretty the room in this thread is.

Pretty paint with oak.

On my monitor your door and window trim looks nice. A nice dark honey oak, not orange at all. I'd look at European (especially UK ones) sites and magazines for inspiration. They keep wood trim in their houses and it looks more than fine. IMO, it adds warmth and character to a house.

As for the kitchen, what jumped out at me were the soffit lighting, the wallpaper and the glass blocks. The wallpaper is really the odd man out in that room. Removing it will be fun. :/ Best of luck with that. Everything depends on your budget. I don't know how long you've lived in the house but I wouldn't rush into anything with the kitchen. I'd make a careful list of what works and what doesn't in terms of functionality and see what the budget covers. (Kitchen are notoriously expensive to remodel.) Updating lighting (when it's too yellow) is often recommended but that can also get expensive. My priority would be figuring out the flooring as it's the background to everything. Finding something mid-tone that works with the wood trim is possible.

You also mention the bedroom dresser. (The pic didn't post.) Perhaps you want to start decorating the master bedroom so that it's cohesive and meets both your tastes. Paint and trim can transform all sorts of furniture so I wouldn't be too deterred by any furniture style. If it's good quality, it's often worth keeping.

ETA: An article talking about paint colours that go well with wood trim.

Many posters on this forum have substantial experience with changes to housing and buildings. In the course of acquiring their knowledge, they have come across many opportunities to be part of and observe projects. Anyone with a significant other has tales to tell about decisions, misunderstandings, differing priorities, and other relationship issues. Part of my approach to life is to raise awareness of possible risks to someone's mental, physical and financial health. I have paid some very expensive tuition in working toward my degree from the school of life. Pointing out the existence of minefields is something I do for myself as an attempt to be a positive contributor to society. While you may not be interested in this comment, perhaps it will be of benefit to another Houzz user.

You may believe that the changes to the house are only about the house. You are free to disagree and disregard all comments to the contrary. However, you chose to use all caps to emphasize that changing the wood is off limits. Your reaction to comments about the difficulties ahead of moving from his house into your home indictates to me this is a touchy subject for you. You do not have to accept any advice you receive but the issues that arise and how you resolve them will set a pattern for your future relationship.

My favorite colors with honey oak are greens and blues. If you have sufficient lighting, a teal blue can be gorgeous with oak but stick to lighter shades if the space is dark or small. Sometimes updating the lighting is a quick way to give a new look to a space. Plus, as we all grow older, the lenses of the eyes gradually decrease the amount of light that gets through so more and more light is required to get the same results. Installing dimmers and more and brighter lights is relatively cheap and easy with z noticeable impact

Wise words, Lyndee Lee.

Another thought to consider, OP: an interior designer can be a valuable neutral third party to help you both form a cohesive whole house decor plan.

Read this Houzz article on paints that work well with oak trim. Creams, teals, blues, some greens go well. Take a look: https://www.houzz.com/magazine/11-terrific-paint-color-matches-for-wood-details-stsetivw-vs~9025200 Consider a light cream as in this photo for kitchen and adjoining open spaces and perhaps the teals and blues for your bedroom. The wallpaper really has to go, but the oak doesn't. It'll look fine with the right colors.

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The wood doesn't need to be touched. Which, BTW, is mostly pine. The cabinets are oak.

That kitchen wallpaper, OTOH.... I would bargain for removing the wall paper & those lights in the soffit---you can find reasonably priced recessed LED fixtures on Amazon.

Well, I hardly think it needs to be said again, but the wallpaper in the kitchen is hideous, I think even just getting rid of that will be a vast improvement. It is unfortunate that there is no window over the sink, maybe you could put a mirror there or something. Why is there glass block at the ceiling? The bottom cabinets look ok, the curved detail on the top dates the kitchen, but if it still pretty functional, it might be ok.

I don’t think that grey is a very complimentary color with honey oak. Have you seen the blogs talking about best color options for oak? There are some that enhance it, some that hide it. Grey isn’t really part of it.

We embraced the honey oak trim in our house, with white walls everywhere and blue/green accents. My living room and dining room:

You might be able to be more tropical in the bedroom through colours and patterns.

https://www.bedbathandbeyond.ca/store/product/kas-reg-australia-cinder-reversible-duvet-cover/237048?keyword=duvet-covers

https://www.bedbathandbeyond.ca/store/product/madison-park-lucy-duvet-cover-set/233998?keyword=duvet-covers

https://www.bedbathandbeyond.ca/store/product/harbor-house-trade-lorelai-duvet-cover-set-in-blue-green/234227?keyword=duvet-covers

https://www.ikea.com/ca/en/p/alpdraba-duvet-cover-and-pillowcase-s-blue-stripe-30460632/

https://www.ikea.com/ca/en/p/finnoxel-duvet-cover-and-pillowcase-s-white-blue-flower-80460719/