OH yeah! Zhu Zhu Pets - we have 2 of them that live here (they came home to this house when they were on sale at Target). They were a BIG HIT 2 weeks ago when some little kiddles came to visit :) Only one little kid cried when he couldn't take his home)and his mom said (privately to me) that one would be under his tree at their house on Christmas Day and so I had to let him suffer. Thanks all for some truly great ideas. I think sometimes its easy not to see the forest for the trees and this little one is flying here from the 22nd through the 26th and I want to make it special, cause she won't be with her mommy. But she will be with her daddy who adores her and so of course do her grandparents! We'll all do the best we can and I sooooooooo appreciate the ideas. Books are on the agenda and so is baking (although that will be a struggle for me LOLOL). I already own a low temp glue gun so that should work for both her and me! No jeans, Cathy! Thanks for the advice! Thanks all - I couldn't reply and say thanks sooner (I'm sorry to say) because we went to visit the other grands down in Raleigh and had no internet access (surprise to us).

Happy Birthday Luvs! Went for a check up for a sore on my nose that wouldn't heal and while talking to my Dr., same one for over 30 years and I worked for him, anyway in his ramblings about one thing or another he called me elderly! ELDERLY!!!!!! I gently reminded him he was only 10 years younger than me and I would get even! He got even right then, had to go to a dermatologist (sp) and they removed the sore and froze several non cancerous sun spots and let me tell you that hurt! Anyway, hope your special day was just that, very special for a special lady! Anj.....I went back and posted on several of you projects I missed in the gallery....you are so good! And it sound as thought you are as busy as ever! And isn't it just totally unfare for the kids to get older, or maybe not. The problem and challenges are still there, just different ones. Don't know how you do it girl! And your outdoor activities, could you come for a visit? Any time would be fine, well maybe in a month when you don't have to wear rubber boots to work through the yard. And I love Peonies are so pretty and really good slug bait. Luvs....read about your photo project....Wow! That is something I think about doing, but there are so many pictures. I did sort them with the help of my daughter and we put names to everyone we knew, but didn't break them down to time and places and in some of the old pictures, that is unknown. So Luvs, did you use the shutters? We are still in the winter mode here, although my water iris are showing green and the roses I didn't trim back are showing leaves. So many things in the yard I usually do in the fall didn't get done and I can't just blame the shingles, it was more like being lazy! Just doen't seem to be enough hour in a day. It was nice to see Punks post, and she is as talented as ever. As to what I am doing in the paper craft world, I use more cutting dies and stamps than my Impression machine. To my way of thinking the cutting machine is more of a scrapbook tool than card making, atleast most of their cartridges lean that way. Which is great, but I want more lacy cuts and lots of layers. So it dies, punch's, inks, and lots of paper. Sorry about the quality of the pictures, new camera = worse pictures! This is one of my favorite digital stamps, I used Copic markers to add the color....markers are a new challenge! These little boxes hold bite size pieces of candy and the photo doesn't show the glitter and bling. Were really fun to make! Anyway....I will try to visit more often and post shorter posts. Take Care All! Belle

Although it was in 2008, someone said above, "I agree that it is difficult to post on this [step] forum. . . it is hard." This is pretty much true today, almost 10 years later. It is still difficult for a SM to post on a step-forum without risking getting roasted. I find that those who usually insist on needing to know more and more "facts," are unwilling to take SM's word for anything and waiting for the right moment to jump on SM to discredit her. Bio-parents can complain all the time, but when a SP does, the first thought is usually SM is over-reacting and SK is being misjudged. A lot of this I see as a cultural or societal issue. Most have no clue what to do with SPs. No clue whatsoever, other than to try to pretend like they don't exist. What is normal or best for SMs? No one seems to really know. Even a lot of SMs aren't sure. Sure, there are some theories out there, but do they work? Like Imamommy said above, we are told to keep at arm's length, so to speak, but what does that accomplish other than ever-present awkwardness? Is it true that it takes a village to raise a child, except when it comes to SPs? Somewhat exaggerated, but I always say a SM's world is backwards from most other's "normal. It's a world where you are supposed to have no say in your own household, a world where you are supposed to give love and settle for nothing in return, a world where you are supposed to be a servant or babysitter and never get paid, and a world where you may be married to your DH but BM and adult SKs still get first dibs on your spouse. Society as a whole doesn't get it, and that includes even some counseling professionals. The entire focus is on pretending like the divorce never really happened to "make things easier" for the children involved. SMs, the vast majority of whom never got involved with DH until after the divorce, are basically expected, in the year 2018, to sacrifice themselves (a/k/a take the high road, suck it up and take it, be the bigger person, etc.) for another family's divorce and fallout from that. There is absolutely no way anyone can justify that a person is supposed to pay a higher price for something she had zero involvement in than the people who were actually involved. There is just no way. Some still try, however. Some SMs get lucky and have both supportive BMs and DHs, and some at least have supportive DHs. Other SMs have neither. And, in these situations where SM is lacking support, what is SM's reward for trying to be the glue that somehow keeps everyone together? It is usually to become the family scapegoat or punching bag. And, society endorses this. If SM doesn't accept her role as the family lackey and a lesser wife, well to get back at her, they'll just slap the Evil SM title on her. What it all comes down to is divorce sucks big time for everyone, but because society as a whole doesn't want to deal with the realities of divorce and wants to act like it is not that big of a deal, and pretend like mom and dad are still the real, one-and-only couple even after the divorce, that means that the only way to keep up this fiasco is to totally degrade anyone mom or dad goes on to get involved with or remarry, to totally discount them. And, to make matters worse, if they dare to protest, then you slap them with the Evil SM label or tell them they are not minding their place. SM's main role is to be a wife to her husband. Her husband's role is to be a husband to her and a dad to his children. SM is her own person, and she doesn't owe anyone anything for what has gone on in someone else's past and not her own. She shouldn't have to give a long laundry list to anyone to justify that she needs help and support. She wants to do the right thing, and it is certainly in her best interest to do so. But, the only support most ever seem to want to give a SM is to tell her that she is over-reacting and to suck it up and take it. I always tell SMs to do what works best for you, because no matter what you decide or do, someone will be there every time telling you it is wrong. Comes w/the Evil SM label finely embroidered on all of our chests.

Hey! ... So your situation sounds like my life 100%. Im not sure how you can find my posts but one of them is POWER STRUGGLE WITH STEP-DAUGHTER. I have the same situation minus the parents. I am lucky enough that the parents respect me and realise the BM is a sad excuse for a parent. Before I say anything I just wanted to say that it may be a really bad sign that his parents are acting the way they are... because bascially they are telling you by not allowing you over that they do not respect you, your opinions, your relationship with your bf... and I am assuming you have said or did something or voiced opinions and they disagree... What I did after I joined this forum, with the help of the posters on here is I literally removed myself from the situation... The child is 7 just like you, and she runs the show just likes yours. Now basically what I did with my fiance is sit down and say listen, I had divorced parents and my dad was strict and my mom was a push over... I explained to him that for his daughter's sake he needed to teach her discipline and give her rules and guidelines. In the beginning he thought I was a complete jerk so I stayed quiet.. Then things started unfolding on their own. She acted out at a fam BBQ and made him look like a fool, she almost drowned at a cottage we rented because he cant get control of her, she physcially hurt my god daugher (who is 3 btw), she ruined a weekend trip away because she started crying again in the middle of a show because the attn wasnt all on her, and his own MOTHER will not take her anywhere anymore because she is out of control and drove her absolutely insane on a weekend trip... these are just some of the things and this was what i can remember all in a 1-2 month span...And we have her every OTHER weekend. Bascially then, he came to me and said listen I really dono what to do. I am so lost. And my response was well I'm not an expert but I can see what you can't because I am not the parent and she is SCREAMING for some guidelines and rules. I told him straight up if you do not get her under control and respecting you then when she is a teen I feel extremely sorry for you and her. As you said she adores me too. But I have had some things happen to my in the last little while as well.. One of my posts was about a day that she was being bullied at daycare so I kept her at home that day before she went back to BM and she did not listen to a single word that came out of my mouth the entire day. She has ZERO respect for elders, and MINUS respect for her father and in turn me. So now the rule is I do not take her anywhere without him. And he is giving the discipline... I like you, am trying to help him and her... but as the posters on here will never fail to remind you,.... your not the mom, you have no say. When this child's BM doesnt care for her in appropriate ways, I can't do anything about it. So now I just let him handle everything. When his BM freaks out and calls and acts like a 2 yr old. I just leave the room and let it go on. Because as much as you want to lose your mind on him, her whatever just remember NONE of this is your problem. Enjoy him, and YOUR relationship. And enjoy the little one when shes around, help her with her homework, cook together do fun stuff. But if he doesn't discipline her and she drives you nuts... guess what, shes NOT yours so you have the choice that you can leave. It really doesn't sound like the situation will change if he doesn't think there is a problem. And him constantly tellin you she is # 1 is telling you that whatever YOU have to say means F*%& all and you may as well give up saying anything. He is not listening. He is listening however to what his parents say (who seem to be quacks) by the way. I would suggest taking some time and thinking about the situation. Forget about the daughter for a moment and his family and really think about what exactly it is that you two have together... Is there even anything there? do you even do anything together or have fun or is it all based on HIS parents HIS kid and HIS problems with HIS BM. Just remember at the end of the day if he doesnt respect your opinions that what exactly do you have together? The best of luck, Dont forget to update us here lol I always wonder whats happening in the poster's lives after they post and get responses haha!