You certainly can't go wrong keeping it all the same. its hard to tell without seeing a floorplan. You can transition between definitely separate rooms if you like, but it's best to do the open concept spaces the same. Personally I like to keep everything on the same pallette. So our upstairs bedrooms vary in shades from each other, but each belong to the same chip. You can also pick an accent color for an adjoining room, and make it cohesive by keeping those colors in the first room. For example, a blue rug and pillows in the living room, and blue walls in the dining room (with white wainscotting on the bottom).

Gray IS neutral, as are beige based and off white colors. Why invest in "trends"? Invest in a more timeless color that is not subject to fashions trends. That is sound advice when building a wardrobe or adding elements to your home. Who cares what "NO ONE" wants? The real question is to ask what it is that YOU want? "NO ONE" does not live there....you do. You cannot go wrong with a neutral and non dictating base color. You can always add accent colors. Those should be the trendy colors---the accent colors. They are usually the things that are more easily changed out. This kitchen needs more that just a change of color for the cabinets, though. It is almost a moot point. I agree that painting them is not always a good choice. I had painted some cabinets in my kitchen at one time. Once you opened the cabinet door, you saw that it was really an old cabinet. Unless you are going to go behind the doors and renew that space as well, you might as well not waste your money and time. They almost never look good. I have seen some that do. But, most times it is not a good look. Besides, the finishes on a new cabinet door are finishes that I could never attain from using ordinary paint. And, to get such a resistant and smooth factory finish as what is on my KitchenMaid cabinets would require materials and tools and techniques that are not readily available to me, the DIY person. One advantage for you is that your doors are a slab door and are easier to work with. The two colors that you chose are beautiful. It looks like what ever is on your floor has a gray tone to it.

“we really like the modern European style but that seems to be the most expensive.” Nope. There are Ikea cabinets. Reasonably priced. If you don’t want to put them together yourself, you can hire a contractor to do it. Also, the two photos you posted are not “the modern European style”. They seem rather traditional to me. Before investing in changing things in your kitchen, pin down more what style you really like. As has been mentioned already, your current cabinets have the dated arch design. They also don’t reach the ceiling. Painting them won’t change that, and I think you’ll be disappointed in the result. You don’t mention budget. If you have the funds, change out the whole kitchen for a new kitchen that is in line with the dream kitchen you want for your house. I am guesstimating - assuming you don’t make structural changes like taking down walls - it will cost $30-40k if you make middle-of-the-road choices. If you don’t want an entire re-do, I’ll repeat what others have said - change the counters, backsplash, and switch out the black-hole appliances for gleaming, reflective stainless steel ones. When you change the counters, you’ll want to replace the sink with a more current one, and remove the little tree line of sink fixtures you have there for a single-handle integrated-spray faucet.

I think you are being much too hard on yourself. I think it looks great. The light concrete is a good color for your historic home. I would consider painting the gray trim about 2 shades darker to emphasize that pretty roofline.