here's her BAKE A THON post! Aunt Marlens Bake-a-thon: The Report This will be as long as the day was. At 8 a.m. the cleaning lady Marta arrived along with her sister Carmen and a friend she introduced as Rosa. Rosa is a stern-looking hefty woman who looked like she could take on The Rock (thatÂs another wrestler, Murphy!). She was perfect for the ordeal to come! I was going to give them each a cattle prod for disciplinary purposes but then realized I had not caller-blocked the number to the child abuse hotline. At 8:20 the doorbell rang and I opened the door, me a vision of holiday loveliness in my bright red outfit with my Santa Claus and U.S. flag pins and my red Christmas ball earrings. Immediately, a 5-year old with chicken pox was thrown at me! I tried to throw him back but his mother stuck her foot in the door while screaming that the red spots on his face were only an allergy reaction and that he was fine. He was holding on to my neck, smiling and asking for cookies, so maybe he was fine. Nevertheless, I asked his mother to raise her right hand and solemnly swear Bin Ladin was not using her child as a weapon of mass destruction. She laughed, kissed me and ran happily to her car. And weÂre off! By 9:30 the gang was all here. I had 17 offspring ranging from 3 to 17 years of age. Besides all the food I had in the house, I also had diapers, milk bottles, baby food and what look like a miniature turkey baster which I was told is used to stick it up a kidÂs nose to extract snots. I took a moment to threaten the 13-year old FSK. Those are not his initials; itÂs just how I think of him. It stands for Future Serial Killer. (Oh, you donÂt know him so pipe down!). He has not done anything really terrible yet, but give him time. He does play these horrible practical jokes which are anything but funny. Like the time he put lots of plastic puke in the bathroom during a family fiesta and one of the grandmothers wet her pants cause she could not bear to go in there. I told him with me he had to toe the line or lose both his feet. I divided the gang into 4 groups and named the 4 oldest kids "Baking Coordinators." There are glass double doors leading from the kitchen/family room into the covered terrace so tables were set up outside so the mixing could take place there in order to minimize a decrease in property value. There was noise and measuring and mixing. There was so much flour in the air I thought foghorns would be set off. The FSK found a brownie mix in the pantry and asked if he could make that. I agreed figuring while he is doing that he will not be stealing the keys to my car to go joy riding and maiming people. The chicken pox kid was trying to add blue food coloring to confectionerÂs sugar and had more on him than in the bowl. With the red splotches and blue food coloring on his face against his ivory white skin he looked as if he had some sort of patriotic fungus. I did not see any of the 4 dogs about and I was told they were cowering in a corner of the living room. MartaÂs resolution to "clean up as we go" was futile within the hour. As I was measuring chocolate chips the 5-year old next to me mumbled something about earrings and stuck a maraschino cherry in my ear, apparently thinking it matched my earrings. I smiled and patted her head lovingly. I then was going to remove the cherry so I could stick it up her nose but I realized it was helping to dim the off-key screeching of Christmas carols coming in from the terrace. It was a horrible sound, but on the bright side, it was deterring crime in the neighborhood. So I left the cherry where it was and went to stand on the other side of her hoping sheÂd find another ingredient for the other ear. Just then Carmen let out a scream and said, "Senora, one of your dogs is licking diarrhea off his rear end!" We all gasped and turned to look at Wolfgang doing just that, but I knew it wasnÂt diarrhea! The FSK had smeared brownie mix on his rump to freak us out! I TOLD YOU!! I knew I was going to kill him and was pondering how to dispose of the body among the cookie batches when Rosa got in his face and told him, in no uncertain terms, that if Wolfgang was not cleaned up within 5 minutes he would be the one licking the dogÂs butt. I am now officially in favor of human cloning as long as it is confined to Rosa. I loooooove that woman! The three of them went off towards the guest bathroom and the baking continued. They returned looking like the U.S. Swim Team and Rosa announced the guest bathroom was now an indoor pool. By about 5 p.m. we wrapped the cookies for the ride home and a few parents were already there. Then there was silence and it was time for Aunt Marlen to cry her eyes out and babble incoherently. You see, last year the kids had pooled their allowance money and with a little help from the parents gifted me with the most beautiful cut crystal cake plate with dome and matching server. I was hysterical at the time but this year I told them they were positively forbidden from spending their money on me. As they stood there in silence smiling at me I said there had better not be a gift for me. The 9-year old piped up that there was a gift, but that nobody had spent any money ON me but FOR me. And I was handed a letter which certified that a $100 contribution had been made in my honor to the local animal shelter. "ItÂs for the doggies, Aunt Marlen" I was told. And at that time all pain left me and I thanked God for every brat around me. And whose idea was it? THE FSKÂS!!!! And he sat there, grinning at me, all of his wet self! I know what you are thinking, that I pegged him wrong. Well, I didnÂt! He will still grow up to be a serial killer but at least now there is hope he will only murder other serial killers instead of innocent people. Hugs and lots of kisses on my wet cheeks followed and I was alone at last. I went to the master bedroom and looked at the reflection in the mirror. I looked like one those weird Trekkies. I had lots of food all over my person. I didnÂt even know some of the ingredients had gone into the cookies! I would have given myself up to end world hunger but I know even starving people could not bring themselves to lick me. I then heard DHÂs arrival from work. He walked into the bedroom, took one look at me and said in his supportive tender loving way, "Wow, you look like nuclear waste!" Caught in the spirit of the moment, I asked him in a sultry voice if he wanted "to get it on." He replied that he not only DID NOT want to get it on, he wanted to get out of the house. I told him as long as he was out, to pick up a pizza for dinner and headed for the shower. I ate my pizza in bed. Thus, concluded Aunt MarlenÂs Sixth Annual Christmas Cookie Bake-A-Thon. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night! I have the one too where she made the giant muffins...just got to find it!

I do agree about salmon. I make it all the time. A whole salmon whenever i can but more for a family gathering of 10-15 or close friends, 10-20. Special occasion when i get my hands on a wild caught fresh. But then again, if i did this for DH, i would do a seafood theme like a big lobster, king crab bake/boil. Lots of oyster shucking, some on the grill. All outside, newspaper covered table, Salmon and charcuterie inside with fresh veg chips and more snack things....end of June b-day appropriate. Pretty, That is in Ontario. Citarella in NYC does similar for catered parties. Love when i see it. Had it a couple times this past year. Back to veggies... Fresh veg is nice as 'chips'. Us veggie lovers love veg instead of tortilla chips. On a mandolin it is a just a few minutes to zip through a dozen veggies. Best if your market sells singles so you can just but one or two of each and select the big ones. On the left is a quick pickle. Then some i made earlier for dinner....a bed of thin veg under a cod fillet. Same idea that i serve with my hummus. (not the steamed, the fresh) But, you need mandolin skills. It is a super tool and so quick. Should be in every kitchen. It also makes very thin veggie sticks for spring rolls. The new model Benriner is my favorite. A glove is a must. The older Paderno is the best spiralizer i think. I like that it folds up but you cannot make chips on it. I can do so much more on the mandolin. Spiralizer is fun for some noodle meals.

I promise last one for a while. I may get banned too -- I changed the recipe, sooz, (hangs head in shame) HAHAHAHA:))))! Original recipe found here: https://www.skinnytaste.com/barbacoa-beef/  There are close to 400 comments so it's been vetted:) I'll put my changes in bold. There aren't too many (cough, cough:) BTW, I'll put corn salsa on next post. I didn't change it and it is a winner! Ingredients: 5 cloves garlic (I grate on microplane) 1/2 medium onion 1 lime, juice 2-4 tbsp chiptoles in adobo sauce (to taste) (I use 1 because we're babies) 1 tbsp ground cumin 1 tbsp ground oregano 1/2 tsp ground cloves 1 cup water (I use Chix broth lo sodium -- highly recommend that) 3 lbs beef eye of round or bottom round roast, all fat trimmed (I use boneless chuck cut in ~2 " slices) 2 1/2 teaspoons kosher salt (I only use ~ 1 tsp -- always can add more) black pepper 1 tsp oil (Don't use) 3 bay leaves Directions: Place garlic, onion, lime juice, cumin, oregano, chipotles, cloves and water (chicken broth) in a blender (I use immersion) and puree until smooth. Trim all the fat off meat, cut into 3-inch pieces (Cut into 2" slices). Season with 2 teaspoons salt and black pepper. Heat the pressure cooker on high (use saute button for Instant Pot), when hot add the oil and brown the meat, in batches on all side, about 5 minutes. (I don't do any of the last two sentences.) Add the sauce from the blender and bay leaves, cover and cook on high pressure until the meat is tender and easily shreds with 2 forks, about 1 hour. Instant Pot --65 minutes (I cook for about ~45 minutes natural release 15 minutes) . (If you’re making this on the stove, simmer it on low at least 4 hours, adding more water as needed to make sure it doesn’t dry out.) Once cooked and the meat is tender, remove the meat and place in a dish. Shred with two forks, and reserve the liquid for later (discard the bay leaf). Return the shredded meat to the pot, add 1/2 teaspoon salt or to taste, 1/2 tsp cumin and 1 1/2 cups of the reserved liquid. ** I don't do the 1/2 tsp salt, etc. At the end, I'm usually left with 2 cups of liquid. I defat (shocking, isn't it?), add 1 Tablespoon of fresh squeezed orange juice and about 1/2 Tablespoon apple cider vinegar, no extra cumin. If you do the oj and vinegar, please do less, taste and add as you like. Here are some pics because I don't actually talk on my phone:) Actually, will send to SIL -- he made it with the 4 chipotles last time HA! Idea of portion -- that's actually a pretty big peppa! Immersion blended ~ 2 Cups Chuck steak I foodsavered in January. About 1 1/2" to 2" thick Cause I know you want to see chuck cut into slices:) After PC: defat -- notice the distracting zinnias in the background -- clever:) Almost 3 Cups I went 43 minutes just to be different. Sending in to elders, so made a finished plate just for pic. DS snagged it, put some extra sauce on for an "early lunch":) Rice made in IP too. CathyinSWPA

I have a Fagor pressure cooker that I use all the time with a portable induction burner, and so I do not feel the need for an IP. I also have a crockpot that I pretty much never use, and it stays in the garage. With the pressure cooker and induction burner, you can set the heat low enough that it is very similar to a slow cooker, but you need enough liquid to keep the food from sticking. I've never been able to understand the advantages of slow cookers/crock pots. I poached a chicken in one once and was not impressed - I liked the results from the pressure cooker a lot more.