Houzz changes, and what to do about it
Rosefolly
5 years ago
last modified: 5 years ago
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5 years agoSheila z8a Rogue Valley OR
5 years agoRelated Discussions
Can't change him, so how can I change my attitude about this?
Comments (21)Love - You said "He said fine, he would have to leave work early, didn't want to "inconvenience me" yada yada." and "I asked him what made him say that and he just said "well, I can't leave work early today." WOW. So I guess in his MAN MIND that is his way of acknowleding that I wouldn't do it." The way I see it is this was his way of making you feel guilty for being a SAHM, but unwilling to help him out with his kid. Don't give in!!!! Be strong in that HE needs to do what HE needs to do for HIS kid, and it wouldn't have to be this way if the (in the words of Sweeby) bat-sh*t crazy b*tch hadn't come in your home and punched you. Pseudo said "....I guess my point was if he puts BM before you ... if you had a child with him where would he draw the line ...." This is totally what I have been thinking for a few months now, but could never get the courage up to say anything. Where will he draw the line? Your DD has already been subjected to so much from this woman, and he's not even her father! How much would he put a child of his own through? Example: my friend has a DD with her DH who has 2 DDs with a crazy BM. The DH is a SAHD to the little one (DD with my friend) and would take her with him to pick up the other DDs on his weekend. It became a habit that the BM wouldn't be home at p/u time and wouldn't answer her phone. He would wait around for them to return (afraid that if he left he wouldn't get to see his DDs). One time, the little DD was in the car and carseat for 4 hours while he tried to track them down and waited for them. 4 hours! My friend finally said "You can wait around for 4 hours if you want, but you will not have MY daughter sitting in a carseat for 4 hours while you sit in your car outside their home." Basically, he had no problems putting BM ahead of his new DD. Remember...the squeaky wheel gets the grease. You just have to start squeaking louder than her. Jupiter said "I think that they need to see their ex's as good mothers (even when they clearly are not) maybe to somehow reassure themselves for when they are with her." So, so, so, true. My DH knows BM is a back-stabbing liar. But then he says stuff like "well, BM says it's SD's decision and she asks her all the time if she wants to visit". So why would he believe that one statement when he's caught her in so may lies before? The only thing that makes sense is he NEEDS to believe she's a good mother. Jupiter also said "I too run into arguments where he lets her slide on things that he wouldn't with me..I try to give him the example that if it was anyone else in his life he would have told them to go to h#$% because normally in life you don't do favors for people who don't do for you let alone someone who puts him down as a father..." and Love said "But it just totally goes against DH's overall nature, which is so frustrating." This is the issue. Which personality is the REAL one? I have this same problem with DH and I'm starting to think the way he is with HER is his personality when he's vulnerable and that scares the crap out of me because I guess I rarely ever see him vulnerable. I agree with FD. When I am flexible and accommodating with X, it is usually in the best interest of DS, and I do the work. I rarely (if ever) ask DH to do anything for DS, although he would be willing, because I feel like DS is my sole responsibility since I am the parent....See MoreHow do you change the suggestions on your main Houzz page?
Comments (1)If you click on 'edit profile' in the upper right corner of your Houzz page, you can scroll down and change your favorite style in the profile info--be sure to click on 'update' when you've deleted the info, or typed something new. (If that is what you are asking.)...See MoreWhat would you change (or not change) about your walk in pantry?
Comments (27)I don't have a walk-in but I love having a spot on the wall in my pantry (a plug) to hang my little dyson stick vac. The rest of my cleaning items (steamer, vacuum, brooms etc) are in a place a little more remote but it's handy having the vac hanging on the charger since that's the one I use at least every day. I would also keep a convenient spot for my step ladder, even though I'm not exactly short, it's still handy to have near the kitchen. My current house is an old farm house [it completely lacks storage] so the few little closets I do have end up storing lots of random stuff so I have drawer for batteries, flashlights, extension cords, tape, random household tools/nails (so I don't have to go out to the detached garage to hang a picture or change the batteries in a kid's toy.) Not saying that is ideal persay, but depending on your situation and floorplan just something to consider. Oldbat's pantry is gorgeous, but I think I'd go insane when nothing was ever put back in it's proper spot! LOL perhaps it's just easier on my anxiety to just have it a free for all to begin with!...See MoreThought you would like to see what Houzz thinks about uploading issue
Comments (5)Same old message I got. When I pushed the issue after that response [telling them I was an IT person, had tried 5 different browsers including chrome], they just gave me a song and a dance. When I pushed further, they claimed they were working on the issue, which was a couple of month ago. Thru external sources, I next got the name and contact info for one of their actual IT guys. I messaged him thru that source [Linked-In] but he never replied. I found another name there but had no way to contact him. It looks to me like they don't care and are not going to do anything to help....See Moreportlandmysteryrose
5 years agojacqueline9CA
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5 years agoUser
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5 years agojerijen
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5 years agoingrid_vc so. CA zone 9
5 years agoLisa Adams
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5 years agoSheila z8a Rogue Valley OR
5 years agomaryc_gwSoCA/USDA10
5 years agoPlumeria Girl (Florida ,9b)
5 years agolast modified: 5 years agoRosefolly
5 years agojerijen
5 years agoSheila z8a Rogue Valley OR
5 years agoLisa Adams
5 years agolast modified: 5 years agomaryc_gwSoCA/USDA10
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5 years agoRosefolly
5 years agolast modified: 5 years agomaryc_gwSoCA/USDA10
5 years agoportlandmysteryrose
5 years agolast modified: 5 years agoSheila z8a Rogue Valley OR
5 years agoPlumeria Girl (Florida ,9b)
5 years agoportlandmysteryrose
5 years agoSheila z8a Rogue Valley OR
5 years agoRosefolly
5 years agoportlandmysteryrose
5 years agomaryc_gwSoCA/USDA10
5 years agoportlandmysteryrose
5 years agolast modified: 5 years agoportlandmysteryrose
5 years ago
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