On walnuts: when my son was young he was allergic to peanuts, they gave him hives. One Christmas season I was cracking walnuts while he was sitting on the other side of the peninsula and he began wheezing as I was cracking. The wheezing wasn't new, he had asthma, but the direct cause that time was the walnuts. The good news is that he outgrew his allergies to peanuts, eggs, and corn by the time he was 7. (The egg allergy was keeping him from getting some immunizations, which was a pain for school purposes, so the allergist sent out blood tests and when they came back clear he vaccinated the kid. He made us stay in the office for 3 hours, but all was well.) My point is that I think you're wise to avoid a walnut based product under the circumstances.

I've had soapstone counters for three years and have tried oil as well as a variety of waxes. Most recently I made my own and I'm never going back! The price difference is astounding. I've used Alberene's dry wax, Clapham's, and I think one other. I like waxes better than oils but I haven't had a preference (other than price) among the waxes. The key is to use as little as possible and buff it completely. If you have an area of the counter that seems lighter don't try to keep piling wax on. Just put on a thin coat and leave it alone. It'll darken in a few minutes. This is the recipe I used with this beeswax. Since I have a sous vide setup for cooking I melted the wax in that, but you could also do it like in the recipe.

Thank you so much Pluckymama. That is a great help (and you are right, they do look great). I am off tomorrow to see a few more slabs of SS (Minas and Beleza) and will take another look at the Nordic Black. The Mumbai Grey SS that I took a sample of is doing the same watermark thing you are experiencing (and wow, the mineral oil only holds for a day at most). Soapstone International has told me it has to do with the finish (which they 400 grit, but that sounded kind of crazy considering). As I was thinking about the watermark issue, I just wondered if anyone has tried carnuba wax? I say this because it is used on cars (stay with me), and on the glossy coating of candy (like M&Ms). My thinking? Food grade, OK. And if it buffs to the point that it protects car exteriors, it is obviously durable.

Um...even "soft" soapstone is stone. As in rock. It's going to have the same effect on your glassware as other stones. For truly softer, try wood. You can test the soapstone you find yourself. Toss a cup of water at it. If the water beads up and falls away, rather than making a damp spot, it's really soapstone. Also, I've never seen soapstone slab that wasn't 3cm thick. If you can easily scratch a deep line in it with a nail (like you pound into wood) or nailfile (like you shape your fingernails with), it's probably too soft. If normal pressure produces no line, it's hard (for soapstone). If you just get a white scratch that has no real depth and doesn't have loose talc sliding off, it's "normal". The darker black look is what you get with oil or wax. Soapstone sheds water but it attracts oil. Unlike with porous stones, the oil doesn't soak in, per se, but it sticks to the platelets of the soapstone, and after the first few treatments, forms a hardened surface that has that black look that will last for months. The oil will come off with a good scrub, however. As you've read, rings are usually caused by the surfactants (soap) in rinse aid residue, and similar disruption of the oiled surface. If you do buy soapstone, do your best to get it from, and have it installed by, someone who mostly works in soapstone. It handles differently than other stones, and there are differences in how it should be installed. For instance, you don't need a substrate, and the seams should be in different places than you'd do with a crystalline stone like granite. It also matters how the surface has been polished. For that true black look, you might consider Absolute Black granite. It's readily available, and very durable. I believe it's one of the group that don't require sealing, and it's not prone to fissures so shouldn't chip without extreme provocation (I mean, there's only so much anything can stand when struck by a fire axe). I love my soapstone, but it's the hard, green kind, so different than what you're looking for.