Over the past 4 years, especially my first and second, my budget was SO tight. I only bought roses for less than $8, and bought many a grade #2. Honestly looking through my garden now, I can't tell the 1,s from the 1 1/2's from the 2's, and really don't remember or care which was which. I specifically remember two grade 2's I got from Orchard Supply - a Brides Dream, and a mismarked Pink Promise which ended up Pink Peace. They took a long time to mature, but they are both GORGEOUS now.

You want to compare Apples to Apples - this means you need to know what you want. Specifically, what cabinet construction you want. For example, if you go to Home Depot and see a cabinet you like, the salesperson will start going blah...blah...blah. So, you need to know some specific parameters to ask about. For example, you like door style A, that's nice - Home Depot's standard is particle board, there is a "partial" plywood upgrade and then the full plywood construction upgrade. What do YOU want? Note, 1/2" plywood is not the same as 3/4" plywood. So, you need to know what you want and take those SPECIFIC details to different cabinet showrooms and even a few custom cabinets makers to find out who has the best price on the exact same cabinets. If you want to get an apples to apples price comparison, try laying out a small pretend kitchen with standard size cabinets and bring that in to the various places and have it priced out - that will tell you what the best deal is. So, a 36" sink base with tip-out drawers, a 30" 3-drawer pot and pan base, a 42" blind corner cab. A 24" (or 27" if you want 15" deep uppers) corner upper, and a few standard uppers. ALL cabinet manufacturers offer these cabs, so this is a way to get an idea on different pricing. Make sure you compare particle board to particle board, or all 1/2" plywood to all 1/2" plywood, or all 3/4" plywood (mostly custom, rarely semi-custom) to all 3/4" plywood. And make sure you compare equivalent drawer slides as well - here I suggest you do not accept anything less than Blum Blumotion undermount soft-close glides - you'll be miserable otherwise. Don't go in with a complicated layout to get a lot of different prices to compare apples to apples - the more complicated it is the more the salespeople talk and throw you off your goal. Keep it simple for now. As for pull-outs: Yes, there is a HUGE upcharge on ordering cabinets with them already installed. It is MUCH cheaper to order the pull-outs separately online yourself (Rev-a-Shelf, Hafele) and install them yourself or have your cabinet installer put them into empty cabinets BEFORE they are installed on the walls. This, unfortunately, is the only way to ACCURATELY compare prices among the gazillions of cabinet manufacturers out there. After that you can do a real layout and compare the pricing on exactly what YOU need amongst the 2-3 cabinetmakers you know already offer the best value for the money.

HI Vienne, please be aware that Looking for Alibrandi covers the issue of youth suicide. My 13 year old step-daughter read it and loved it, but you might want to read it yourself first. Its a great book and explodes lots of myths about fitting in, etc. I second the recommendation for "Night". Its very powerful. I think I first read it when I was about 14. What about " The Secret Garden" by Francis Hodgeson(?sp) Burnet for the younger readers. Its a beautiful story. I think I read it about 12 times. Or the Narnia Chronicles by CS Lewis? A forerunner for Harry Potter. I'm surprised no one has mentioned Shakespeare. Romeo and Juliet, The Merchant of Venice, Much Ado about Nothing, and Twelfth Night are all fairly easy reads. I started studying them when I was 13 with an inspiring teacher. If you can debunk the mystery of Shakespeare early on, you will give your kids a huge confidence boost, and reading and interpretation skills that will set them up for years. I agree that we seem to be 'dumbing down' our kids, but I'm quite inspired by the suggestions here. Cinnamonstick, thanks for those titles. I hope I can get them in Australia! Cheers Danielle

At our school each teacher has their own method that is basically keeping track of behavior. One second grade teacher sends home a paper each day with either a green, yellow or red stamp on it. Very similar to your son's teacher. Some use a bulletin board in the room where the entire class either receives or loses points based on individual behavior and behavior as a class. Some teachers use marbles or blocks. They all use something like this. Most of the kids are good kids. There are some kids who do have behavioral problems that are mainstreamed, but the teachers do not subtract points for their behavior (the feeling it would be unfair to the other children since they cannot control their behavior). I have never thought it was a bad thing. My son is in high school now, and yes, even though every one of his teachers would tell me he is a joy to have in class, even he lost the occasional point. We would just sit down and talk about what happened. Once he understood that the teacher was not angry at him he was fine with it. A friend of mine had more problems getting her son to relax about it, but he brought home a lot of red stamps early in the year before he started to settle down.