I'm not a great DIY-er..so the good advice wouldn't be from me personally. Actually the latest DIY I tried to do was gel staining oak cabinets to refresh them..what can I say..not easy..:) our handyman on the other hand did an amazing job..))ah, and btw -the stain that had the name of my wanted color was all wrong when applied..mixing two totally different colors gave a good result. who would know, right?..

but it's quite a tedious job if you're more like me and less like my handyman(who's really impressive in everything he does).

that was a long introduction to advice you might find more useful, in this post I found:

https://www.kylieminteriors.ca/tips-ideas-update-oak-wood-cabinets/

(I obviously am a bit surprised she says "if you're a man you like oak cabinets, and if you're a woman you don't"..so what, in 80 s and 90 s all women suddenly got a specific masculinity shot, and loved oak cabinets? And now they're back to their feminine nature?

c'mon..

but this Kylie is a very nice down to earth lady so whatever:)

(no, I'm not a fan of oak but then I never was..unless it's white and sawn in some special-I forget-how it's-called way..)

and of course don't dump them! these are bookshelves! they hold books! they're functional and there's nothing bad about them, except for the fact that you'd rather change their color.

(if I had your oak and wanted to change it like you do-I'd bite the bullet and ask somebody(probably my handyman lol) to paint it.

Or I'd be, like.."let me see whether I can find some cool vintage gray handles on Etsy, to tie things together"..and who knows maybe I'd get lucky:) I'm very persistent when looking for something. My laziness contributes to my progress..:)

I hope you get more advice from people who are actually handy and can share their results..and good luck!

I love the wall unit ... it would look good with the area behind the shelves covered with wallpaper to go with the room.

I've read posts about using TSP to prep the wood, and then use
watered-downed warm gray paint; or using a stripping product and then
applying a gray gel stain, and finally posts suggesting simply painting
the pieces gray. I might sample on some oakwood, but it would help to
narrow this down to 1 or 2 finishes to make a trial run.

General finishes has a grey gel stain that requires no stripping. You clean the wood thoroughly - soap and water, then mineral spirits - scuff it lightly with a sanding pad and wipe off the dust with a cloth dampened in mineral spirits, then wipe on the stain thinly (wiping on is easier to control than applying a lot and trying to wipe it off evenly) in one or more coats. Then wipe on their gel top coat.

It's easy. I did an entire kitchen, two bathrooms and some hall cabinets.

https://generalfinishes.com/retail-products/oil-based-wood-stains-sealers/gf-oil-based-gel-stains 

Test on the upper side of the top shelf or inside the doors. They also have milk paint if you want a solid finish. Several shades of grey, and it can be mixed with other colors in their milk paint line.

https://generalfinishes.com/retail-products/water-based-milk-paints-chalk-style-paints-glazes-pearl-effects/milk-paints-furnitur

Thanks for your prompt input and link! Aprilneverends-there's a part of me that definitely wants to hire out for this one! There's also the bulldog side of me that knows I can remedy this myself and save a bundle, but if the right handyman would do it for a reasonable fee, I wouldn't say no!

lazygardens - thanks for commenting on the unit - I do love it, I just see the room not fitting in with the rest of my one-story house which I've been gradually updating. General Finishes - I was happy to see you reference it. It is the one product I've been looking into in depth because of the properties you mentioned. But I didn't realize it could be applied without a strenuous stripping of the underlying finish. I'm encouraged by your comment about doing it and it not being difficult!! I guess it's time to make a trip into my local hardware store or the woodworking store that carries the line! I was mostly interested in the gel stain, but last night after I posted this discussion I started looking at photos of gray wood pieces finished in milk paint, and really liked several that were done using the colors Driftwood, and Seagull gray mixed together. I'm thinking I should start with a sample of each on a discreet spot on the armoire (the side hidden by the bookshelf butted up to it).

I

I would be inclined to paint a lighter colour for three reasons:

1. From what your describe you are going for a fresher, lighter look instead of a cozy look. I would be worried about the bookcases creating a black hole on that wall

2. I think they are very nice bookcases however for me personally for a more modern, streamlined look I would more want them to blend in with the wall colour

3. I think dark bookcases look better accessorized with a lot of light and reflective objects....from what I see of your things, they look more functional and a little darker. For example the very nice vases on top of your armoire would be swallowed with a dark color.

Light with a contrasting back

Dark accessorized with light objects

Medium grey with a contrasting back

great suggestions..and I'd like to add maybe a fourth reason-being painted, they'd create a nice soft contrast with the kitchen..a bit of a different note..

and I-as you plan to as far as I understood-would also go with either softer warmer gray..like in your curtains..or similar to the last pic robo posted..you also have your warmer kitchen flooring so unless you plan to change it, you need to mind it.

love the idea of wallpapering the back/making it different color..they'd look cool anyway though, the books themseslves provide color etc. also shelves are not high, they're book height, so might be interesting, and might be too much..either lighter constrast with the main shelving, or smaller pattern, or just leave alone

ah..and of all the greiges I met I probably like BM's Kingsport Gray the best..it's the warmest and fairest of them all, well at least to me

I am a huge fan of General Finishes, either their gel stain, or their milk paint.

I gel stained a bathroom vanity, and was freaking out after the first coat because it was all streaky. However, I've since gel stained more, and found it to be very easy to achieve very professional-looking results (and I'm a perfectionist). I even used it on the fake oak/melamine sides of cabinets, and it has held up very well.

Still, you have to understand that it will be quite opaque looking, more like paint --- even the stain.

Check out this thread on GF milk paint http://ths.gardenweb.com/discussions/3485219/cabinet-paint-rave

The paint comes in a whole range of colors and also directions on how to achieve in-between colors by mixing.
http://designs.generalfinishes.com/color-category/color-mixing-lab

Link to their Design Center with lots of pictures of projects, organized by color, product, project, etc. with links. You can also search.

Oh, and I'd also consider adding some molding.

I'm pretty handy but I found gel staining to be tedious and glitchy. It may have been my OCD but I was disappointed with how streaky it came out. I tried to to do a very light hand each coat but ended up having to go darker than I first wanted so I could cover the streaks.

Also, your grain is pretty heavy and sometimes gel stain seems to enhance the grain. I agree with others that painting is the way to go.

This is what happened to me and I wasn't happy with the results.

I would be very hesitant to mess with this, especially since your floors and kitchen will continue to have warm tones. Even in the modern gray and white schemes, people often keep natural wood tones for contrast and warmth, and you might be sad to have eradicated the nice character of these pieces, especially with a risky color treatment. At the very least, do your paint and rug and then reasses. You might like the wood at that point, and/or the connection to the kitchen, or you might want to paint it all light, or just the backs of the shelves, or you might still like your original plan to stain/paint toward gray. But once you do those things, there's no real coming back to wood.

Also, I can say that the only thing about the whole wall that looks "dated" to me is the style of the doors. You might see whether you could have new doors made for the unit in a simpler style (maybe Shaker or craftsman) and with less grain, which could be enough to update the whole thing.

Wow! Lots of great suggestions, and it's accomplishing what I set out to do in this discussion. I was having a block from obsessing over it. Here's the thing, I know it's dated but the cabinet wall does flow with the kitchen and I don't intend to replace the tile floors in the kitchen or the kitchen cabinets. However, the scope creep Anniecat mentioned is a real issue! It's already happening based on what I did in the den/bedrooms which are quite visible being that this is a smaller ranch. So the "domino effect" has already begun. Without having unlimited funds to change everything, where do I quit? Perhaps I leave the family room as is, so that it flows into the kitchen, and leave it at that. It might also make sense based on Robo's suggestion, that if I were to change the cases, I consider a lighter paint. I can see how a dark gray will possibly make that wall look like a dark whole, considering it's such a big expanse in an otherwise lighter-toned room. Hmmmm, much to think over! Thank you everyone for your input - each post is helpful and I'm considering all the tips!!

well warm grays and off whites are still warm..they feel warm..I have plenty of them, and I do have lots of walnut and teak etc besides them, and the result is warm..then I love colors and textures and it of course contributes to it feeling even warmer, just because I'm into warmer color in general, whatever they are, in 90% I'll choose a warm version of a color

(please don't count how many times I said "warm" in a previous sentense, I'm deeply ashamed of myself))

but I agree that painting the walls first, bringing in a new rug, etc, will show a room in a new light, and the OP might feel different about the bookshelves..in case of such big job, it might be easier to start with less hard and more reversible ones

Great suggestion Aprilneverends. I too LOVE warm and even in the rooms where I incorporated grays and a more modern decor, the goal was to keep things warm and inviting. I think the takeaway from your comment is that I should hold off on the cabinets until I paint the walls and bring in a new rug. It might be all that's needed (and a couple of new neutral textured throw pillows!)

maybe this order..paint the walls..find a new rug..start sneaking in accessories, both in family and kitchen, with a tad sharper constrast(doesn't mean getting rid of old ones..just sneak in new ones..I do a lot of sneaking myself nowadays.it works))..play with tonals too..brown and gray don't have to be the opposite, they happily co-exist in nature thus can in your house..creams and beiges and browns and warm grays and a bit of white and black together are cool..bring in more plants (maybe you have them already)..plants do everything-want more modern? plants! want more vintage? plants! I don't know how plants manage to do that they just do. maybe they're secret silent wizards I don't know

I think that hardware can be quite a game changer, unless you dislike the concept

I managed to make a very contemporary bookcase into softer one that goes better with my DD's bohemian vibe, just by finding new knobs. I did look for years I won't lie:) I did find them though

and while you do all that and you feel you'd still rather paint-you paint:) And you didn't loose anything by waiting, because you were creating a space to your liking all that time..

oh sorry I didn't see your answer working on another essay of a comment lol..yes. to put it very briefly, which I seem unable to do..))

Great suggestion acm - Changing the doors would likely make a big difference in making it appear less dated. I think the best thing I've taken away from comments here is to start small and wait on doing anything with the cabinets. Paint, rug and switching out accessories will guide me toward what, if anything, needs to be done to the cases. And, maybe the next step after those changes is switching out the doors, before I consider painting anything. Sure beats the idea of all the work necessary to painting a large expanse of wood, only to find that it didn't work in the room!

I would remove the doors, or at the very least the top set. It will give it a lighter feel. If that's not enough, I'd paint the unit white or off white.

Peg East, painting golden oak wooden cabinets is totally different from painting walls as you know. I was planning on painting my golden oak cabinets until I looked at previously golden oak cabinets in several homes that were DIY projects. The grain showed through all of them, even those that had four coats of paint on them. So, I highly recommend looking for a cabinet painter who is a true professional. And by that, I don't mean someone who comes in and spray paints your cabinets. I mean a professional who comes in, removes the doors and drawers and takes to his shop to paint. The frames, of course, would be painted in place. A good cleaning, a very, very good primer used all over, and then about three or four coats of a very good waterborne paint. I just had mine done and am speaking from experience. The cabinets are now gorgeous and have a smooth coat and look just perfect. My whole family is very happy with the outcome. That happiness would not have been in place if we had tried the DIY method. E-mail me if you would like and I can tell you more.

Just wanted to mention beadboard wallpaper to cover the doors, and even trim them out with a thin piece of molding to give them the look of the real deal. The wallpaper is white, but can be painted. I paint furniture I sell in a local antique mall and have used it on the back of cabinets or sides of dressers when they look pretty bad. Anyway, I usually paint an ivory color then use a bit of burnt sienna watered down slightly and wipe it on and take off the majority. It works well since the wallpaper is vinyl. I also use a water base dealer over it. Doing the door fronts and the back of the shelving would give you a whole new updated look, IMO, unless you hate beadboard. You could also have someone use the real stuff but it would be more costly since you probably wouldn't want to do it as a DIY project. Wallpaper is easier than paint!

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Hmmmmm,. Sorry, the picture didn't show up, but check eBay.

I only did a quick read and don't have a bunch of time right now ...so real quick....

I'd paint them an off white or creamy white. I wouldn't do gray anything unless it was a simple, inexpensive change like pillows, art, accessories, etc. because it's trendy. While I've used and like GF gel stain, you can only go darker and if everything else is light wood (kitchen cabinets, floor, trim) I think it will look out of place unless you go with a color. You could do gray, but I just think it's a lot of work for something that's trendy.

Also the GF gel stain vs. paint - the stain is way more involved than painting. Not necessarily hard but time consuming.

OK, I'll be honest: tl;dr. Why is everyone writing novels today?

Hahaha - do I get to keep the hound groverazel? But, it's refreshing to hear you say the entertainment center isn't the worst thing you've seen, and I appreciate seeing the photoshopped versions! To be honest, I have loved this setup for years, and the intention when it was first installed was to appear built-in. I agree there needs to be some editing of the "stuff" on the bookshelves. I'm leaning toward putting any changes on hold until the hardwood floors are refinished (next week!!), add a new area rug and paint the room. It's very possible I'll be ok with the cabinet after that, and if not I might see about switching out the doors for a flat panel, however it might be tricky to stain them to match the rest of the unit as they have likely yellowed over time.

Sheisback - I have given thought to the fact that gray is and has been very trendy, and it will have a dated look at some point in the somewhat near future. Of course that's always a problem as the trends change more often than is affordable for many of us! I always try to be true to my taste and select finishes on the big items that are somewhat neutral and not the "latest" trend, hoping to have some longevity with the spaces I decorate.

Thanks to everyone for so many wonderful comments and suggestions! If I feel a change is necessary as in paint/stain after sprucing up the decor, I think I'll also consider a local refinishing professional and get a quote. My biggest reservation is investing all the time and effort in doing this myself and being dissatisfied. I'm very handy, and it's not that I feel I'm incapable of doing a decent job, but it's more about not really knowing the end result until it's, well, done, and realizing it wasn't perfect or the look I love! (I am a perfectionist especial with this type of project!)

The discussion that's occurred here has helped me to step back and give it a rest, and work toward changes in a step-by-step manner. So thanks to all!! I'll try to take photos and post if I'm able to update this room in a manner that works - at least for me - which means maintaining a warm comfortable look, while creating a cleaner, updated feel.

I would remove the upper doors. Ideally you can just pop them off and be good to go, but if it needs reworking to look finished, I'd consider cutting back the whole upper portion to match the depth of the flanking bookcases (from the lower dooirs up--id leave the bottom portion for storage).

The upper doors are actually on rollers and recess into the sides of the armoire, so I already have a pretty good idea of how that would look when I have the doors recessed. The problem I have with it is just seeing the big black TV screen. I like the option of being able to close the doors and not look at the blank TV. Thanks!

Molding and removing some of the shelves and the doors --- with black TV screen.

And, yes, you'll always see the grain, but that may not be bad. A lot of my interior doors have fake oak grain...

Check this out:

Detailed instructions here: http://www.thethriftyhome.com/2012/01/refinished-and-rebuilt-entertainment.html

Great to see a direct example-thanks!

I would be concerned about using gray when it is a trending color and may not last through this decade. I like the dark unit that nosccermom included in her post, especially with a black TV. I would consider gel staining all of it a darker color - or having it done.

I believe that to be true as well. The gray I've used in other rooms is in items that can be easily changed such as throw pillows, comforters and decorative objects. Your comment and others on this discussion reminded me of that fact that gray is a trend that will be dated just like the golden oak I'm struggling with now!

A reversible way to change some of the color is to change the back of the shelves. Cut foam board to fit the spaces, and paint or cover it with fabric. Push the foam into place and it can be removed or changed easily.

Great idea. Just tonight I was thinking about possibly installing wallpaper on the back of the bookshelves which is used to prepare rough or paneled surfaces for paint, thinking that if I were to paint the back of the bookshelves I'd prefer not to see any wood grain there. But using foam board makes much more sense - - far easier to do and more flexible to experiment or change up in the future! Thanks partim!!

I think it's a great looking unit and very warm and cozy room.

I am not a fan of gel stain. I've never seen a gel stain piece that would

satisfy me. I suggest you paint the unit. You have a choice of either

painting the unit the same color as you paint the walls ( paint the oak

unit with semi gloss paint) or slightly darker. You would have to do some

hand sanding first to prepare the surface for painting. Remove all

dust and then apply a coat of primer, then paint the unit.

We made a small cabinet with a set of doors for a hole in the wall we had from

removal of an air condition. We used recycled oak that we lightly sanded

then painted it in a semi gloss paint to match the walls.

We did no prep on this wood and the grain of the oak shows through.

I like the look of the grain showing through.

You have some choices, either paint it to match the wall color with

the inside back slightly darker or visa versa...or everything the same color.

i have pics of my painted oak cabinet...

I'll get it for you and then you can decide if you like the painted oak look.

I would love to see your pics cliff and joann. Like minds-as I've been reading through suggestions here I'm leaning toward painting it a color similar to the walls and to possibly paint the backs of the bookshelves darker. Thanks for your input!

Peg, looking at your pics, I see you have light looking oak kitchen

cabs. I think painting the unit the same as your walls and the inside

slightly darker would look great...I did mine the same color as the wall

only in a semi gloss paint. As I said, the wood was old recycled

free flat sawn oak.

Truthfully, I can't remember if we primed it first, or just dove in head

first, and just painted it. I seem to think the latter. Also, don't remember

how many coats of paint at least two, maybe three...

I took a close up to show the texture of the just painted wood (I

mean without a wood filler) I call it a scared look. :) Even though

our LR is more formal than our family room,...I think the 'scared look'

finish looks real nice and full of character.

You need to get a block of wood wrap it in medium sand paper and

sand it a bit...then repeat with finer sandpaper. Wipe down thououghly

before painting.

Here is the close up...note the scaring finish that wood takes on...

BTW this oak was made from old church kneelers...we scored a bunch

of it when our sons church replaced the old kneelers with new ones. :)

Here's more...

Oh I think it looks great-I'm encouraged by this. Thanks for sending!

I don't know where you guys are, but actually around here everything gets painted white..:)

(ah unless it exterior-they're suddenly into a tad darker browns. The builders I mean)

I know there's gray trend but I know because I'm here and I read blogs and such

otherwise I wouldn't know probably.

(we re in OC, CA)

so I wouldn't care whether gray is a trend or not

I would just care that whatever color I choose(if deciding to paint at all) it's the color that makes sense with other colors that are there to stay..and with my own mindset that's probably to stay too, at least to some degree

all these whites and grays and greiges are so different too..like, hundreds of them

they also change in different lights..that is our brain that assigns them a constant definition, really

I have a very warm greige kitchen and sometimes it's totally oatmeal and sometimes it's more greenish off white..it doesn't even have a name since the color is custom, and it's somebody else's custom color, so I just called it after myself lol, to make things easier.

and recently I got so confused, like majorly confused, since I read on one blog "greige is white with some gray in it". I thought white with gray in it is an off white? don't you have to have beige-a light version of brown-thrown into it to get greige?

I think that's a hard-to reach-consensus since I'm not even sure of definitions. and I'm very into everything about colors, so would make sense for me to become more sure, but it doesn't work that way lol. Somehow.

What I know though-until we have our world and nature around us, all the colors that are there, be it sea or sky or snow or sand or leaves..they're timeless..:) to us they are, since we have much shorter expiration date..:)

ah, and I love that idea with foam too..much easier to apply and to switch and to change

*IF* you decide on gray, I would suggest a darker charcoal gray, only because it's the lighter shades that are so trendy at the moment. I've used a charcoal on a vintage secretary, and it looked stunning, and sold quickly! I think it's also a color that mixes well with contemporary, and is more sophisticated than lighter shades which look so blah, IMO. I feel black Is also TOO stark, too dark, but find the charcoal very appealing. I would also paper the back of the bookcases, if only to make the job easier. Paint first though! It's a project I think I would tackle, but I've painted kitchen cabs in the past and learned from that. It's hard work, but it's patience that's really needed. ;)

If I do decide to paint I'm definitely getting some salvaged golden oak wood (hopefully from the local Habitat store) to practice on. I'll know the right color when I see it. It might take more time to do this, but just like sampling colors on poster boards before committing to walls, I think it'll be very helpful to see it on wood before I tackle the cases.

definitely so..gosh I was choosing from already painted doors, for ten days or so..and these were just different shades..and they all looked great when laying on the floor..but the moment I put them vertically(as they'd be irl) that's it, I didn't like them as much anymore, and wasn't sure anymore..and there were like 12 or 14 of these doors, and I dragged them around the house to see them in this light and in that shadow..and my MIL looked at me like she was seriously considerering whether to maybe get me commited..:)

now she loves the color, probably her favorite thing about the whole house

I told her "see, was worth looking for the right one"

she told me "yes, but I was just sooo full of pity, seeing you choosing.."

LOL

Peg, good idea on getting practice wood. Here's more food for thought.

we made a 'charging station' end table for next to my side of the sofa

in the den. I was definately going to paint it teal because I loved the teal

in the rug. Last minute I changed my mind and decided on a rusty red

that was in the rug...We used a combination of stain on the table with a

little red in the table as well...and the charging box red! Think about this...

painting the unit a color a leaving the back of the cab in the existing oak stain

that's already there.

the beauty of paint is it's always a hop and a skip to do over -- if you dont

like it.

This is from when we first made it...you can see a bit of the teal and a bit

of the red in the rug. Here's the table with a bit of red paint worked in...

In case your interested -- this is craft paint purchased at Micheals...

I also gave it three coats of butchers wax instead of poly.

This it it a few minutes ago...The craft paint is a flat finish and the final

butchers wax finish gives it a soft luster... As far as holding up, I use this table

every day as we charge our phones and iPads a lot...I also use either a coaster

or a book to put my drinks on :)

Wow-you did a great job on this!

Not sure who's still interested in this discussion, but I'm seriously considering a ceruse or limed finish on the oak bookcases. The link below is an example of the look I'd like to see with them. It will be labor intensive (removing existing finish, sanding and staining in a natural stain, bringing out the wood grain/pores in the oak with a wire brush, and then liming the wood). I realize whitewashing with latex paint has a similar look, but it's not as rich as a true cerused finish. My mind is made up - now I think I'll need to pour myself a wine while I take on this project - it's going to take considerable time and effort, but I'm convinced it's the look I'd most enjoy having not only for these large oak cases, but for the overall look I'm going for in the room.

I'll post a photo when I'm done in case anyone is interested in the end result.

There was this thread, in two parts in the kitchen forum, using monocoat to course oak. Scrappy?

Cerused! Thanks, Peg. I love it and I learned something today.

Lot's of digging to get info on it, but I too was excited about the process and what it may produce!