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1st Place! Ugly House Contest and Regrettable 70's Design

John Snow
6 years ago

My house would win any ugly house contest hands-down providing I photoshop my dog out of the photo. I'd like to spend time with the original designer to hear the reflections of a life's shoddy work and its impact on personal contentment in the sunset years.

Anyway, my funds are limited but I will pay dearly regardless. Below the photo is what I'm thinking and I'd appreciate any constructive suggestions. I thank you in advance for holding back your expressions of disgust and disdain caused by the hideous nature of my house.

1. Paint the brick - this house is a poster child for brick painting. A lime wash would not suffice.

2. Replace the windows and address symmetry - cut the brick, install at least standard sized windows along with casing, trim, and possibly shutters.

3. Ditch the awnings.

4. Shrubs/landscaping to hide the A/C units

5. Extend the porch to end closer to the center of the house, with steps facing the house.

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