Feeling overwhelmed and exhausted

Anna Cunningham

I am a mother of a toddler and she needs a lot of attention, doctor's visits, I take her to some classes and usual drive is 30 min one way She is very demanding and clingy. My first daughter is 16, in high school and needs me driving her and picking her up daily from sports. I cook dinners every day, I clean, etc. I am trying to work out, which takes 40 minutes a day, I am trying but it does not happen on a schedule.

We also moved to a farm house and going through renovations, A LOT OF yard work, dealing with some irresponsible contractors. My husband is busy at work, and I am responsibly for managing the property.

We also have chickens, which my toddler loves and it keeps her busy, so I can do some work.

I started and since abandoned the garden, planted some fruit trees that need care, we have a dog that needs training, and my part time helper just left since he just found a job that would pay for his college.

Besides I am trying to do some repairs by myself, and that involves fixing chicken coop, making a flower bed, some curtain sowing, some wood refinishing.

We can hire some help here and there, but believe it or not, it is hard to find a responsible person, it take long time.

So far I am out of the house driving 1/3 to 1/2 of the day, then making dinner, cleaning a bit, doing laundry, some work around the house, maybe paying with my toddler , and by then I am so exhausted that I fall asleep when putting her to bed.

I want to make something creative, a project, paint a picture, read a book, but there is no time.

I do not know where to begin to get out of all the responsibilities and make our lives easier. I am absolutely overwhelmed. If I had a choice, I would move into a mobile home, where there is nothing much to clean, and have another mobile home as a playroom.

I see those women blogging about the repairs and projects they are doing in their organized house with 5 kids, and I have no idea how they do it. Do their kids eat? Do they play with their kids? Most probably, but how do they do that?

Comments (3)
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Hugs. I don't have much advice but wanted to let you know you're not alone. I have a 17 month old and I feel like pulling my hair out. I'm lucky if I can squeeze in a shower! And after that, there's no time for anything else. At one point in time I even googled 'how do other mom's do it' - cause I feel like I'm fighting just to keep my head above water! I have too many projects left unfinished and an endless to-do list; and somewhere off in the distance lies my 'want-to-do-for-me' list that seems about as realistic as taking a 747 to the moon in 1 hr flat.

I don't remember the last time I went a full day without pondering what it is I'm missing here? Feels like I'm a defect of the human race! Lol

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Sandplum1-Bring Sophie back!!!

I'm guessing those moms who are uber productive have family members that babysit and husbands who take active roles in helping when they get home. Don't be so hard on yourselves. Ask husband for help. OP, your 16 year old could watch the little one and let you catch a nap. Even if y'all think you're not being productive enough, just being on high alert with a little one is exhausting. We all need a "mental health break." Don't be so hard on yourselves.

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susanzone5 (NY)

Sit down with your daughter and husband and agree to split home jobs like cleaning, fixing, cooking, shopping, playing with the toddler. Take the weekend to go out and do something yourself or with a friend while hubby takes care of the house and kids. This is the 21st Century. Women aren't slaves. Family members share work.

I used to have a play group with 4 moms. One day a week one mom would take all 4 kids for 2 hours at her home and the rest of us would do whatever we wanted by ourselves. We switched every week. That worked really well. I got to go clothes shopping without pushing a carriage. What a treat. Husband came home and did the diaper and bath for our kid. He did the vacuuming.

At one point I began to stay up till everyone was asleep. I could read a magazine, knit, watch TV. You've got to have some alone/relaxing time to keep your sanity and health. And you have to make the other family members do some work.

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