Executor of husband's will
newgardenelf newgardenelf
7 years ago
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colleenoz
7 years agotfitz1006
7 years agoRelated Discussions
Settling an estate... what's involved? (long)
Comments (5)I settled my mother's small estate without a lawyer. Most helpful was our county's office relating to wills and estates, which had just about all the information needed on their Web site. I also called them and asked questions as they came up. I had to deal with a few obtuse clerks (mostly, they were not used to dealing with relatives who were not lawyers!), but got through it. Also a big help was our tax accountant. The money we paid her to do the final tax returns was well worth it. On the car: make sure you wait to cancel insurance until AFTER you transfer the title to someone else. On the apartment: could you hire someone to pack up everything and clean it out for you and store any personal effects to sort through later? It's hard to go through everything at a time like this. Even though she had already moved out of her house and was in assisted living when she died, it took us years to finally deal with some of my mother's things (most of them were in our garage). I did NOT have hostile or difficult relatives to deal with (four siblings, but they were all cooperative -- happy to have me do all the work!), so that's another wrinkle. Good luck....See MoreHusband sabotaging decluttering efforts
Comments (49)My husband saved everything! He would save boxes, we have two places, one being a property and cabin. He would take stuff to the dump and come back with more than he left with, this place, I managed to keep relatively clutter free, but found a horde in the shed yesterday, and I still have to clean up the basement horde. We had pizza, and I went out to the cabin to find mummified MICE in the pizza boxes, he was going to use them to light the stove he said--they were still in the woodbox six months later!!! Granted, I suspected a hording issue, but I never truly saw how bad it was until he was literally on his death bed from cancer! I hadn't, at that time been to the cabin in years because he would invite strangers to come and live with us when I lived out there with two small children. One stranger committed suicide. He always put his friends and strangers before the safety of his own family. There were a couple that had a cabin close to us, the fellow died of leukemia, but before he died, my husband made sure that their place was sold so that the widow wouldn't have to look after that. WHY???? They had three kids in town, that was not HIS responsibility! Me, he left with a major hording issue at the cabin, over acres and acres! I walked thru the property for eight hours and didn't get thru a quarter of the stuff. I bawled for entire time, and then screamed for two!!! He didn't care that he died and left me with that mess to clean up. Also, our other property he left a mess too. He never repaired anything at all, now I have to try and sell things off for what I can get out of them just so that I can move to be with my special needs son. Why didn't I leave, because I had a severely disabled child and financially could not have afforded to do so, then he got cancer and I had to take care of him. I put up with all this for 26 years. So, to your husband, does he want you to be left with a mess to clean up when he dies? I should be mourning for hubby, but believe me, sad as this may sound, I am thrilled to be free to clean up the mess he left me to deal with. I feel nothing for him but anger, bitterness and resentment. It is very embarrassing to have to get people to clean up his messes. He horded probably 40 vehicles, scrap metal, over 100 propane tanks, he built shops and sheds to store more and more, he had old motorcycle parts, snow mobile parts, coleman campstoves, generators, welders, you name it. His dying wish was to have more friends visit and to see if he could find parts for two of his clunkers, not getting someone in to clean up the stuff, he didn't care that I had to clean it up, but he expected me to bring him meals in the hospital because NOW he finally liked MY cooking ha ha ha. He knew he was dying for seven years, all he did was collect more stuff. Granted, it exploded when he found out he was dying, but still. How can a person do this to a loved one???? My family wants me to start dating and meet someone else ha ha ha ha ha---as if I want to deal with THIS again!!!! I just wanted to share so that you and your husband can do something about this NOW before you end up like me!!!...See MoreWhat to include in a letter to your survivors/will's executor?
Comments (26)I'm bringing this back up because I heard about it on Len Tillem's radio show. He calls it the list of 11, and I think it's on his website.. The List of Eleven One of the most tedious and difficult tasks in administering a trust or an estate is finding the decedent's estate planning documents and asset information. Frequently, children have no idea where their parents kept these important documents. After you pass away, the last thing you should want is for your children to have to search through your belongings in a tragic scavenger hunt to find your will, stock certificates, and other important papers. To avoid these difficulties, you should organize your personal and financial data. This is where the list comes in. Collect the information described in this list and give a copy to your relatives, or put the list where you know they can find it. In case something happens to you, the List of Eleven is one of the best ways to ensure that your relatives can find all your vital records. The name of the bank where you have your safety deposit box, its number, and the location of your key. The numbers for all of your insurance policies, health, life, auto, home, burial, etc., and the names and addresses of the agents for each policy. Itemization of your stocks, bonds, mutual funds, and the numbers of each, and the name and address of your broker. The names of the banks or savings and loans for each of your accounts, and the account numbers. The location of your cemetery plot or mausoleum niche. The location of your Will and the name of your attorney. Your credit card numbers. Your Social Security number. The name and address of your mortgage holder, account number, and the amount of the outstanding debt. The name and address of your accountant, and where your past income tax returns are located. The type of memorial or funeral service you want....See MoreWhat to keep in a safe deposit box and what not to keep
Comments (20)Elmer I need to apologize for laughing at your comment. You seem to relate what knowledge and what people do to what their job/s were. Which is true for many men. Women are not restricted to what they know and do, except in certain instances, to any job that they have ever had. Men should not be but for some they are. Most learn all throughout their lives. Much of what we women learn is not learned for any job unless you consider living as a job. Women's knowledge is also not restricted to classes although I because I enjoy learning about many things used to take one or two classes college and other types each year after I graduated. My classes as they are for many women were for my enjoyment and to gain information on a wide variety of subjects. Want to know how some cultures make their own ink? Last night I was reading about your beloved living trusts and most of the sites confirmed what I have been stating. There are things like bank accounts, pensions, and while most only mentioned IRAs or plans with a designated joint owner or beneficiary that all of the articles suggested that without a strong reason like a minor or disabled child or a person whose spouse or significate other would take the assets they should not be placed into a living trust. Anyone wanting to read about the do's and don'ts of living trusts can simply do a search using "Living Trusts" then if they want additional information they can contact an attorney or any other person that does financial planning. I suggest reading several sites as each one can present the information differently....See Morenewgardenelf newgardenelf
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