Nope. Not a bad person at all. I felt the same way. So we did opt to do 2 major remodels the first of which entailed the main floor with a new kitchen. But because it opened up into the rest of the house, we kind of had to change the woodwork to "match" the new kitchen. While we did replace our oak cabinets with walnut cabs (rather than white), we did switch out all of our trimwork to white throughout the entire main floor, including doors. Then we did the upstairs a year later which also entailed remodeling 2 bathrooms in addition to the trimwork. Some people may call us crazy but it's beautiful and we love it.

I totally get where you're coming from. Start researching all your options now because some day, you'll be ready to pull the trigger and you'll have done all your homework by then.

According to Kierkegaard's Either/Or, it is human nature to become bored with whatever one has and want to change it. I think he calls this "the rotation method" and wholeheartedly embraces change.

I do not like oak kitchen cabinets (or woodwork) although I do like oak floors. I have wood kitchen cabinets that I do not like, but at least they are maple instead of oak, and so they bother me less. I also do not think it is worth the money to replace them since they function perfectly, and if I replace them, I will tire of the replacements eventually as well. I did change the hardware as soon as we bought the house, however, and that helped a bit.

If you could do a limed or cerused oak finish over your oak, I think it would help, and it is not the same as paint.

Here's a photo of a dining chair design I did with a cerused oak finish:

Lars makes good suggestions..the chairs wouldn't be as attractive with white painted wood IMHO..our house is wood heavy..sitting in the woods as it does stained woodwork fits our house..I've had this very discussion with my neighbors who've considered painting woodwork and doors..none have done it yet..

Do you have any pictures of the trim and cabinets? Maybe people would be able to give you ideas about how to minimize the oak look. However, it is probably better quality than cheap MDF painted white trim in some of the new builds.

I prefer the look of white but it is more difficult to maintain. I can't stand seeing dirty baseboards. So, one benefit you have is that you could probably skip dusting the baseboards one month and your house wouldn't look dirty!

If it bothers you that much you could try painting the cabinets. Start with a bathroom cabinet and see what you think. If properly prepped, painted cabinets can be very attractive. You could also consider using General Finishes gel stain.

You could consider refacing them

Hi - Original Poster Here.

Thanks for all of the nice replies. I appreciate all of them.

Hubby and I just got back from a Christmas party at yet another house with all white woodwork. I asked him if he thought the house was pretty, and he says, "the trim was all straight". That's it! I thought the house was gorgeous!

They had a huge kitchen island that would work so great with our family. I asked him if he noticed that. Not really, he said. Really?? is my thought!!

Lars - what you said about the "rotation method" really hit the nail on the head for me. I really need a change. This is our 4th house in 32 years and they all have had the oak woodwork and kitchens. Hubby grew up on a farm and loves the old 150 farmhouse he grew up in, and change is not something he likes. I am a city girl who moved around a lot so change is something I do like. Mismatched in this area for sure!

djbrandenburg - That's funny about skipping dusting the baseboards! I haven't dusted mine is over a year, maybe longer, because the dirt just doesn't show. The first thing the lady whose house I was at tonight, with all the white woodwork, said is, "I didn't know it was going to be so much work to keep it clean. It shows all the dirt". She's lived in the house for 5 months! Oh, and hubby said to me when we got back home - it's not real wood, but MDF -- we have real wood. Men and their wood!

I would wait out this white woodwork trend, but I don't think it is a "trend" at all like oak. White woodwork is just something that finally came to the Midwest. I'm 55 and can't wait for wood to be back "in".

Thanks again for the replies and ideas. I'm coming to the conclusion after talking to hubby yet again tonight that we are stuck here with all of our oak forever unless "someone dies and we inherit money" - his words tonight. Oh, gotta love him. He's a banker and a long time ago he said that if I died, he would move into the cheapest house possible and be happy. This is before our discussion of a change to white woodwork.

ETA: I was definitely in a bad mood when I posted the above. Lol. Hubby and I talked some more and are figuring this out!

I am a HUGE fan of Oak. When stained light the grain interest is attractive and it is sturdy over time. If I were put in a showroom with many kitchen mock ups to "grade" the impression of expense, the whites would ALWAYS be at the top of the list for "least expensive". Because Oak is out of favor right now it is more reasonable than cherry or the go to Maple. Any stained wood will always look more luxurious than painted to me. Anything painted will always be suspect of inferior wood underneath in my world. I would suggest this is exactly why new builds have white woodwork. Gone are the days of quality in home building. Today's homes are built with the cheapest materials they can get away with. Chances are great most of the doors you covet aren't even solid wood.

Maria killam talks a lot about honey oak. Typically, not always, the wife wants white and husband prefers wood.

Getting someone to paint all your trim and doors White would be very expensive. It's a huge job. I'm wondering if you could start with painting the kitchen White. I don't think it will look half-assed especially if you do proper prep.

To me, Oak trim and doors look the most current in a fairly uncluttered space with neutral or very saturated color walls and big art, and as much white as you can sneak in.

http://www.mariakillam.com/ask-maria-which-colours-dont-work-with-honey-oak-trim/

http://www.mariakillam.com/kellybernier/

http://www.mariakillam.com/happiness-is-a-happy-wife/

I think Arcy hit the nail on the head. Painted woodwork is cheaper than stained. I have been house hunting with DD in the midwest and there is a lot of painted MDF. I feel your pain with reddish stained woodwork but I do think it fits my house.

It's perfectly normal to get tired of things.

There are many things that you can do to freshen up your house without painting all your wood. New cabinet hardware, new area rugs, new backsplash, new lamps, etc.

Post a few pictures of your home. We all love to give suggestions!

My father was like your hubby so I know how you feel. A lot of men just don't understand how important a pretty home is to their wives. I remember my mother wanting new stuff for our house and he'd never approve it. Never enough money. He had to be nagged to paint a room. That woman raised five kids, worked the graveyard shift as an RN at the hospital, and did most of the housework, cooking, and shopping. She deserved nice things. I think she always resented him because of it. I know she was frustrated.

At fourteen years old, your home is ready for some upgrades. Is he going to make you live another 20-30 years with no changes when it's outdated now?

When we moved into our last house(which was a 70's split level), the original wood windows, baseboards and stair risers were wood, stained medium brown. They were pine, not oak. Room by room, I painted it all creamy white. It was a big task, but taken a room at a time, it was doable. The windows were the most time consuming. We also had all the original flat slab doors(also stained) replaced with raised panel which I also painted.

It made a huge difference in the look of the house. It looked more modern and much brighter.

I love oak. We put oak floors throughout our current house and dark stained oak cabinets in our kitchen. But all our woodwork is painted white. I think it makes the oak stand out and get appreciated!

As someone who is slowly removing all of the paint from her circa-1907 woodwork I beg you: don't do it! Our white woodwork shows every ding, constantly looks dirty, and needs touchups once a year. The refinished oak woodwork--nope, nice as is! I can't wait to do the next round of refinishing.

To me, there is a big difference between wood trim in a 1907 house and one built in the 80s or 90s.

Builder grade oak trim in those newer homes does not have the workmanship, beauty or quality associated with the heritage homes. They definitely don't need to be treated the same way.

I have white trim throughout my 25-year-old house. It has been repainted once since it was built. There aren't any noticeable dings or chips. It doesn't really get dirty but is easy to clean. The worst are the couple of door jambs where cats rub and over time leave black marks. They clean up with a bit of elbow grease.

Bottom line: white isn't necessarily fragile or delicate. It can be quite robust.

I totally get you! And I am an outlier...in my 20 years of home ownership....I have NEVER wanted to change from having white trim and a white kitchen. Never even crossed my mind. I live in the South, and probably 90% of all homes have painted trim. All price ranges. Obviously, the white trim in my custom home is more luxurious than the painted trim in my first home. And, it certainly wasn't "cheap!" It is real wood (poplar, I think) which is very paintable. Oak, because of all that visible grain, would be a ridiculous choice for trim that was going to be painted from the get-go.

Here are my issues with oak stained trim/cabinets:

1. I love medium to darkish brown oak floors. Oak trim and cabinets that match perfectly are just too much DARK! And if they DON'T match it looks odd to my eye.

2. When you have oak crown & base, it "outlines" the room. It makes the ceilings look lower to me, and I love high ceilings. White looks airier.

I don't think there is anything unholy about painting wood trim unless your house has a historic designation or something. Bottom line....if you like the look do it! I would put my foot down with dh. It doesn't seem like he has a firm opinion other than to NOT change! :)

# 2 of what Nini said! I don't always agree with painting wood but really really do not like outlined rooms. The house I'm in now had the outlines and the best thing I did was paint the crown and baseboards. My ceilings are only 8' so most rooms have the crowns painted a gloss in the wall paint shade. Afterwards, the rooms looked like they grew wider and taller. I refused to paint the wood kitchen though and a simple fix of removing some of the upper cabinets and doing open shelving really modernized and opened up the space into a lighter brighter feel. I especially like the open shelves near the dishwasher. The thick matching wood shelves have a all off white everyday dish, bowls and other collection ( so you get your white). They go from dishwasher to shelf. Love that!

If you are very unhappy try a few baby steps like I did above first. It might make you smile leaving some of the original soul there but tweaking enough to make you happy.

Some of the dishes are in the dishwasher. However, the shelves really lightened up the space.

Painted crown.

I haven't read all of the responses buI have white trim and cabinets everywhere and hate it. We will be putting house up for sale soon and relocating and I refuse to buy a house with white trim

I am so tired of white trim. I have an older home and I like the orginal wood work in those in my neighborhood much more than my painted trim. I stripped all the doors back to unpainted wood when I first moved in but life has gotten in the way so I never got to the moldings but I wish they had never been painted. Wood seems fresher in that now everyone has white kitchens, doors and trim. I like color painted trim better than white presently.

i love the rooms robo posted they stand out in a sea of white.... Work with you home's wall colors and see if a fresher paint and decor might make your home feel refreshed.

I was going to say if it's vintage oak woodwork than I would not paint, but then I re-read your original post and see that it is 17yrs.old.

I also have white trim, baseboards, ceiling molding in my bedroom. Cream walls, trim and stand-alone cupboards in my kitchen. Yes, I am a little anal about them esp. the kitchen. I dust and wipe down regularly just because I like to see it clean. In the bedroom, I used to when it was first done (2009) but now no one really sees it but me and I am lax about dusting/washing. It needs re-painted too because I didn't use a shellac-based primer and knot holes bled through. I just keep putting it off. I will clean everything once in the Spring tho.

I am contemplating a third option .... the original part of our house, circa 1978, is ugly dark brown pine. It looks cheap. Because our house was apparently owned by a crazy person, we have 5 separate additions with trim that was either cobbled from the 1978 part, or "updated" with 1980s tract honey golden oak. And the back door has painted white trim. The easiest thing would be to paint everything white, and I do see lovely homes that have beautiful white trim, but DH is not a huge fan and I don't know if that would really work.

I'm thinking of doing a dark stained trim, which I think would be an easier way to update the golden oak windows, then replace the main level trim, staining everything sort of like this:

As someone with a kitchen full of oak, I hear ya. I was recently in Home Depot where an employee stopped me to ask if they could come to my house to look at my area of biggest concern and give me a quote for an upgrade that would be good for a year. (I can't remember exactly how this worked, but it's some division of HD that is separate from their retail side, I think.) Of course my area of concern is my 22-year old oak kitchen. The cabinets are very high quality and they're still in excellent condition, but they feel dated. To replace the 29 doors, 18 drawers and re-surface all the boxes would cost $32K. I'm liking oak a tiny bit more these days after hearing that figure, but honestly, I'd love to have a white kitchen and I'd be happy with it the rest of my life. I had white in our last house and loved it. I don't even mind that it shows dirt more quickly.... I'd rather clean the dirt when it shows than be oblivious to it.

Bluebell - did they give you a quote to paint them?

While I love looking at all the white on white/gray rooms, I know that I can't live in them without being a slave to keeping it pristine. White trim is a bear to keep clean-- grungy around door knobs, scuff marks on baseboards, and if you have a black shedding dog-- forget about it!! I went through magic erasers like crazy & was constantly touching up paint around high traffic areas. And all those crevices- horrible.

My house now is not in vogue at all. I went with 1x6 natural cedar & stained pine doors. It's simple and very forgiving. I don't even know if it's dusty- But I still vacuum & wipe it down- old habits!!

I guess I'm telling you the cons of white trim to make you feel better!! I understand the desire for something different.

Boopadaboo, no they didn't. That's not their thing. A local woman has a cabinet painting business, and she's crazy busy painting oak cabinets! I have been meaning to set something up with her to come take a look.

I have painted white trim throughout my house but had honey oak kitchen cabinets installed by the previous owner. They were very good quality and I liked the layout but I always wanted to pain them white during the 16+ years we've lived in the house. I was afraid to in case it wouldn't look right and would negatively affect resale. DH wasn't keen on the idea either. We did update the black appliances with stainless and that helped update the look but never painted for us.

Well, we just sold our house and one of the recommendations from our agent and the stager was to paint the cabinets creamy white. We had them professionally painted in Sherwin Williams Creamy to match the ceiling color and they turned out beautifully. Yes, they do show spills but it actually makes it easier to keep them clean.

Our home sold within 3 weeks and all prospective buyers loved the updated kitchen. I think the oak looked nice but the kitchen is so much brighter and fresh looking now. I wish I had done this years ago so we would have had time to enjoy it :)

Here are before and after photos, before the professional stager added a few more decorative items, and the listing pics.

ETA the listing photos

Tnfarmhouse - Thanks sooo much for posting the pictures. My oak kitchen is exactly like yours was! And the white is what I'm looking to do. Yours is just beautiful! I'm showing these photos to hubby. I know he'd go for painting.

We need to find a professional painter ASAP! The cabinets are in too good condition to tear out.

Question - does the oak grain show through or did the painters prep to fill it in??

Original poster here - Thanks to everyone for all of the responses. I appreciate them so much.

Its nice to know I'm not alone about wanting a change from the oak. I also appreciate the comments about how white is hard to keep clean throughout a whole house. That's the reason I went with all oak years ago - easy or no maintenance. :)

I know if we change the kitchen to white it will help greatly and I won't mind the oak in the rest of the house (as much). Lol

One of the most beautiful kitchens I've seen. What a difference the painting made. To the OP, go for it!!!

Thank you decor and lucky! I think the creamy white paint also made my granite and slate floor look so much nicer. Adding the hardware also made a big difference.

Definitely hire a professional and ask what kind of prep and painting process they use. Our painters were very good and spent over a week prepping, taking off doors and drawers, sanding, taping off protected areas, and spraying primer and a lacquer paint. I think we paid about $3600 in SoCal but it was definitely worth hiring it out.

I also painted my cabinets. It's weird because I thought I didn't like the grain of oak but found I'm okay with it because the grain shows through my paint and I really like it. I think it is that honey colour that I don't like that usually is seen with oak. I did a scuff and really good cleaning, used a really good primer and painted. I did this 9 years ago, when we first moved in, and it is still holding up quite well. We are rough with our stuff and we have/had young kids during this time.

Forgot to add - before deciding to sell we were considering a full kitchen remodel and I got quotes for new cabinets (wood and MDF) ranging from 16k to 35k and new soapstone counters for over 6k. I even put a deposit down on the soapstone.

Since the cabinets were in excellent condition with all the custom inserts, etc., and the layout works well we decided against spending between 25k and 40k to replace perfectly good wood cabinets and nice counters (plus another 10-15k for new appliances).

So glad we did and instead just upgraded with new appliances and paint. If we were staying I would be very happy with this kitchen for a long time before I was ready for a full remodel :)

My cabinets slightly show the oak grain in some places where it might have been a bit heavier, but it's really not that noticeable. I actually don't mind grain showing through anyway. It just means it's real wood under there :)

Tnfarmhouse - $3600 is a bargain! We were quoted $40,000 to replace our perfectly good oak cabinets so painting is definitely the way to go. Thanks!

Kiko - Oh he's come around for painting the oak kitchen cabinets after the quote we received to replace them! lol He's not on board with painting all of the woodwork in the house white. I'm not really either! I would rather move! Lol. But I still want the white woodwork. I tell myself I'm blessed to have a beautiful home and white may be out sometime in my lifetime! I remember what we thought looked good from the 70's! Oh my!! :)

Kiko - good suggestion to post pics. My kitchen currently looks exactly like tnfarmhouse's before the white paint.

OP here - so I posted my original post because I was dreading going to a holiday party at a friend's brand new house that has all white woodwork and kitchen. I was envious and not looking forward to it. Guess what - while I liked her house and the white was certainly pretty, the first thing she says is that it's hard to keep clean (she's been there 5 months). I loved her large island but the house overall was small and cramped. I came home with a new appreciation for my home. It may have oak which can certainly be painted but I wouldn't want to sacrifice our square footage just for a new and different look and have a new mortgage. Ours is paid for. The grass is not always greener on the other side.

Anyway, hubby and I know we eventually want to live in a one story house and the plan is to move to one when last child is done with college in 4 years. We will have plenty of time to plan the new home. And isn't that a big part of the fun - the dreaming and anticipation?!

So do you guys like the table here better?