james, Roughly where are you? Zone 10 should not have cold enough winter temps to worry about damaging the root system. As for what you did, I don't like the tar ideal at all. The tree will have to grow new roots, and those start from the pruned end of of the cut roots. Putting tar on these could very well interfer with that process, not to mention hold moisture that would favor infection with various bacteria and fungi from the soil. No, I don't like it AT ALL. Beyond that, some shading from direct sun would likely be very beneficial. Would certainly reduce water stress while new roots generate. Keeping the soil cool and moist but not wet would be beneficial as Im sure you know. Judging from the pic, that probable won't be an issue. As for Acer gresium, they actually seem to be more forgiving to girdling. I have seen where trees were kept in those tree band pots for too long and been potted up. Those roots had actually grafted on top of the original flare, and the tree was non the worse for the experience. I assume since the bark is so thin and sheds annually, that this facilitates the grafting. If you look online at mature Paperbarks, I don't believe you will find many with indications of bark inclusions at branch points. I know I don't remember seeing any despite some tight angles. That also would seem to suggest that they self graft freely. Arktrees

Thank you....I will do that. Sorry if I sounded like a whiner LOL! I know I need a lawyer...I guess I just needed to unload. It's just so frustrating to even talk to her. I don't mean to sound cold hearted, I really didn't mind helping her....but to go out of my way to be good to her, only to be berated is getting old. I really appreciate the advice. Another thing I'm dealing with is her dog LOL! She has a little Yorkie who I am worried about...it got very sick last week, and I had to take her to the vet for stomach problems. We couldn't figure out what kept making the dog sick. Yesterday I found out that she has been feeding her dog CHOCOLATE BARS! LOL! Her sister had brought her some candy, and that is what she was feeding her dog. I told her that chocolate is toxic for dogs , and she said "Well she likes it, so you don't know ANYTHING and she can eat what she wants!" So now I am going to have to protect the dog from her too I guess *rolls eyes*....

This is a board certified, 'highly regarded' MD. He's in practice with his wife, also board certified. I don't know if their 'nurse' is a licensed nurse practitioner, but...she's HIS nurse and when she calls in a prescription she's giving HIS licence, evidently authorized BY HIM. If she didn't note the Metrogel on DH's chart, is that the patient's fault? If the MD didn't *read* the chart, is that the patient's fault? Exactly who, if not the MD, 'prescribed' the Metrogel? This is *sloppy*! If you call this office you can NEVER speak with or receive a call back from either MD. You have to first tell a receiptionist the whole problem, then -- if she feels like it -- she will pass you along to the nurse so you can tell it all over again. My late MIL, an RN and hospital administrator, always said that dermatology is the ideal practice: Your patients don't die (do to anything you do) and they don't get well; you have them *forever*. Well, not this patient in this case. We think the practice is so large -- and so lucrative -- that it is an assembly line. There's a nine month wait for another appointment should you need to cancel a semi-annual checkup -- even calling a month in advance to re-schedule. Jodi -- Thanks for the Kukui Nut Oil tip. I'm ready to try anything, once DH gets over this nasty reaction. I've seen that stuff all over when we are on Maui. Does your DH have to keep using it, or did the condition clear up and stay clear? My DH is also very fair-skinned, with light blue eyes. His birthmom was Irish and birthfather Northern Italian. Years ago a dermatologist who was seeing him for precancerous stuff said he had the palest shade of skin. (He has to see a dermatologist regularly for screening. Too many years on the tennis team in HS and earlier days outdoors at a summer camp on a lake.) Ordinarily I would have some blistering remark to relate to you: DH's reply to the MD. He'd spent time in the waiting room calming himself, reminding himself that getting angry wouldn't help him. He couldn't think of a reaonable reply to that stupid question -- only to say the doctor's office prescribed it; here's the (useless and worse) tube of Metrogel; now what?

Wow, actually I have alot to say on this issue. First is she the Only child between the ex and him? and how long have you had custody of her? The youngest of my three step-daughters had much of the same behaviors when my husband and I married. She had been the "Baby" in the house and suddenly she had other siblings younger than her. She began acting horribly, and my husband like most men is easily manipulated by little girls.. True some of the behaviors could be associated with certain disorders... However I have found through all of the psycho-babble that even children with mental issues can and will be manipulative and decieving if their behavior gets them what they want. For example your SD may have wanted Daddy (he was at work) She throws a fit, and whallah Daddy takes her out the next day just her and him... I agree that this only reaffirmed her actions. Now had he told her "I had planned on us doing something together today, but because of your actions it will have to wait for another time." That may have nipped it in the bud... She got exactly what she wanted and completly underminded your authority. Has she seen a counselor and therapist? I would definately reccomend this, but also good old fashioned discipline... You need to sit down with your husband and tell him your honest opinions and feelings on the situation. Tell him you are stressed out. Together come up with certain disciplines and make him stick to them. We have six children in our home and I run it like a military boot camp... in the aspect that there is a certain time we do certain things. STRUCTURE is important in children's lives exspecially those with "issues". As soon as we stopped rewarding the bad behaviors and in turn rewarding the good ones, we saw significant improvements in our youg daughter's case. The next time she acts like a baby REFUSE to acknowledge her at all. Think about it, If a baby is spoiled they cry correct and the only way to break the habit is to allow them to cry sometimes. The same rings true with your SD. You spending all that time and energy on her tantrum also reaffirmed her actions. She had you sole attention for how long? I would refuse to even acknowledege my SD's outburst, I would continue what I was doing, or would join the other children watching a movie. If she entered the room still raging I would escort her to her room and say "I'm sorry only big girls get to stay up and watch movies, you are obviously a baby so you must stay in your room." After a few times of missed movies she would quiet down and come out of her room like nothing had happened. Also key if she stops the bad behavior and rejoins the family, DO NOT DOTE on her. Simply say "I'm glad you came out to sit with us. Do not mention the bahavior or say anything about her being good for stopping it! This will only give her the response she is seeking... Ignore the behavior not the child... If you ignore the behavior and she doesn't get the response she wants she will stop it. Also if several days/ or weeks go by with no outburst be sure to tell her you notice how well behaved she has been and you appreciate it. No matter what do not respond to her outburst in any way... I can tell you from experience that this is an attention seeking behavior and the child doesn't care if it is negative attetion or positive. It is the attention she wants, it is your job and your husbands to teach her how to properly get it.