I think the most important piece of information you have provided us with has nothing to do with her abilities and talents. It was when you said she has no one she considers a friend. This is most likely why she does not like school and this is where everyone's efforts should lie. Focusing on academics will not help this little girl like school more. Working on social interactions in a new school district is where you and her school should be focused. The most gifted child will not succeed in life if they are unhappy socially.

I am glad you are helping her instigate social outlets. Play dates are a great idea too. Also remember that MS and HS are a long way away so focus on activities for today and maybe as far as next week's benefit instead of worrying about what will help her years from now. Enjoy the little girl she is now not the woman you want her to become in the future. Best of luck.

Experts suggest when discussing a young artist's work it is best not to imply what you think it is for it can stifle an artist greatly. Instead, if you know not what it might be always ask her to tell you about her work rather than ask what it is or to tell her what it is...

I would hang that picture in my house :)

Some really good points here.

The preschool teacher for DS2 has told me twice now that DS2 is really special and gifted. I think she thinks I am nuts because I don't know how to react to that. he is 4! how special can he be? (that is what I think to myself anyway. : ) the second time she said it she also told me that she really does not ever say that or say it lightly. I wonder if I should ask her more, was she trying to tell me something else and get a conversation going on something? I think there are conferences in November, I will have to ask more about it. I am happy that he is in montessori. I LOVED montessori when I was in preschool and I really think it helped me throughout my life (the foundation I learned there) So I hope it helps him too. But I don't like to push him, he loves to play and pretend. I don't make my kids do the homework (the horrors!) :)

My boys are so very different. it is hard to know how to parent such different kids and be sure they get what they need and what will be best for them to become their best selves whatever that may be.

She chuckled and said "hey yeah. I made a great horse and sunset."

I think she'll be a politician.

You signed her up for a Lego class that prepares her for a club 5 years down the road. I'm assuming that she simply loves Lego and plays with them at home. My kids (one a certifiable Legomaniac) did a Lego class a few years where they also did art projects, mosaics with them, originals and copies of "great art", as well as the ever-popular "free build" time. (Later, when I was a SpEd companion in the class, my kids would join us on their days off from school and help and play).

This has been a most interesting thread and I find everyone's perspectives and experiences so valuable to read. There are so many variables involved when considering children and education.

When one of my kids was in 2nd grade, I got a call from his school's accelerated learning instructor. She wanted him moved from the regular classroom to her classroom. I think I literally said, "This is LisaD, Tommy's mom... are you sure you have the right parent?" I had no idea he was an "accelerated learner" or whatever they called it. (One of my siblings was labeled as "gifted" as a child back in the '70s, but we all thought it was a mutant gene. The rest of us achieved academically because we knew how to study, and our grandparents rewarded us for good grades with money! I thought the whole "gifted" thing was rather ridiculous.)

As it turns out, my son is very conventional in how he learns, is a great test-taker and is the poster child for our current educational system. But he doesn't have a lick of common sense and so any gift for learning wasn't evident to me as his parent. But because of the services our school district offers, he has been appropriately challenged in the "accelerated" track and continues to earn perfect or near-perfect scores on standardized tests. He's just that type of learner.

I could not have home-schooled him. And we pay hefty property taxes that support a strong school district, and this is where he belonged. They treat accelerated learners as "special needs" in terms of resources. (We can argue all day on that term, but that's how it's been described to me.) I'm grateful we can afford to live here, and so this has determined how we addressed his learning needs.

I would encourage the OP to work with teachers and know test results, and learn the resources available to you. There may be resources for your child that you don't yet know.

If someone with an IQ two standard deviations below average deserves special education resources to ensure her needs are met it follows that someone two standard deviations above average (130) deserves the same attention.

Correct Abby but USA is not about fair fair it sinks its money into elevating the underprivileged to even the playing field, not giving our best and brightest the help they need to reach their full potential--those are left to their own resources.

There are equal resources in every school district I have ever known allocated to the truly advanced students. Although iq tests are not regularly given in most decent schools to all students anymore they are equally used by schools when a child is thought by a team of educators to be higher or lower than average to assess those groups' special needs.

lisa's story is the norm not the exception. Lisa's story also helps further establish that parents often do not realize their child's actual abilities or lack there of too. In order to be in TAG or what use to be labeled, GT, in most systems your iq needs to be in the top 98th percent or in many schools top 99.5% cause affluent towns have so many high IQers and most children deemed gifted by their parents are not quite that high when tested.

Our system is still and always has been geared towards the better off, economically and intellectually and to think it otherwise is to be ill informed.

I grew up completely without gifted education programs, aside from the makeshift accommodations I mentioned above in one year. I certainly wanted them as a child. however I don't believe there's much evidence that they are effective. From what I understand of the evidence, it's more of a feel good item to placate parents, and I imagine the kids have a bit more fun. my province focusses on strict inclusion including special needs kids and gifted kids in regular classrooms. Theoretically the teacher is supposed to differentiate instruction although from what I see teachers are not very skilled in that technique or don't have the time to differentiate very well. anyway there certainly is concern that the strong kids are getting left behind but that doesn't seem to be born out by the research. I would imagine that a good quality teacher makes all the difference whether it be in a regular classroom or segregated.

for governments, every child that doesn't graduate high school is an extremely costly proposition. These children are much more likely to be involved with the law (63x more likely to be incarcerated), to be under or unemployed, to live in poverty, etc.

when you were balancing where to allocate public dollars do you devote them to a class of kids who are already doing great and are headed for a bright future, with unproven methods that may help them out a bit, or do you focus on the class of students who you know are going to cost you big bucks down the line and are much more likely to be at risk, and for whom there is a whole lot of research detailing how to avoid this catastrophic outcome?

Whether or not each teacher within each public school actually carries out their responsibilities to all children gifted, mediocre or otherwise is of course antidotal. However, under the common core all children are meant to have individualized work according to ability just as Mtn has stated. It is much easier to institute now with technology but it was also the norm in good public schools when I was in elementary school in the late seventies into the eighties too. Contrary to political rhetoric, United States' gifted and middle class students do not receive the short stick in life or in schools...

When I was young, my little brother was put into grade 2, several months after starting Kindergarten, because the teacher said he was far too advanced. But a month into grade 2, that teacher advised he be skipped to grade 3, because he already knew all the skills she taught for the grade 2 curriculum. My mother was very opposed to this, as she worried my just turned 5 year old brother wouldn't have the social maturity to fit in with older children, most of whom were already 8 years old.

But this school enforced separate parts of the schoolyard during recess, for Kindergarten through grade 2. So they arranged that my brother would be a grade 3 student, interacting with older children in an academic setting, but would play with his same age peers during recess. It worked great for him, as he flourished academically, but maintained a social connection with his own age group.

He continued to do well academically and socially. (He grew up to earn multiple degrees, started his own engineering firm and can practice law in both the U.S. and Canada.) But the greatest thing is that despite his early departure into grade 3, he is still best friends with several of the same boys he originally met in Kindergarten, 50 years ago! Does anyone know if they still 'skip' kids these days, or do they simply put them in gifted programs now?

It's funny because when I was looking into interventions that are proven to work for gifted kids, acceleration actually seems to be one of the more proven interventions. I had major social problems and my parents rejected acceleration for me for that reason but...let's be honest...I could not possibly have done worse socially. Perhaps being in class with older kids would have been better.

Gifted children can often be socially awkward. A lack of intellectual peers who share interests and intensity can make developing friendships difficult. Intellectual stimulation is an emotional need for gifted children. People who say children with high academic potential should be able to hang on through 12 years of sub-optimal schooling are asking a lot of children who only want to be offered a suitable education.

Here is a concrete example of children's needs to be met where they are academically. First important background about my children academically- they go to French schools in SF. In the French system you do not learn to read and write until 1st grade. (Many, many gifted children learn to read and write on their own- my eldest son was much more interested in building with Legos and wooden blocks and running around and looking at bugs.)

When DS entered 1st grade he realized that the girl who sat next to him in class knew how to read and write and he did not. DS spent the whole first semester of first grade as a model student, learning everything his teacher was pouring forth, completing every worksheet presented. I was very happy at parent teacher conference time- no problems at all.

Second parent teacher conference comes along in the spring- it's a whole new ball game. DS does not do his work, does not pay attention. His test scores are great, though. But he is uncooperative in the classroom. Not disruptive- happy enough to entertain himself without making trouble- but not completing in class work. What changed from one semester to the next?

It's just hard to say what the optimal intervention is for these students. There's a real lack of good research that I've been able to turn up. In general, pull out model doesn't seem to be effective based on the literature. So we turn to acceleration (easy but could cause social issues, which gifted kids are perceived to struggle with) or the inclusion/differentiation model but of course this model is highly dependent on skilled delivery. Parents often will want to go with the pull out model but as I said above, this might just be a feel-good item that doesn't do much for the kids. Likely finding an excellent and sensitive teacher is the best intervention of all but of course all parents (not just those of gifted children) want to find that holy grail!

Good question Pickyshopper - I was wondering that too. I have mixed feelings on it. I went to private school till 1st grade after a crazy year in 2nd grade where I had to go to different classes for different subjects in public school they just skipped me up to 4th. I am not so sure that was the best thing, but going to different grades for subjects was really awful too.

I agree, it's a tough situation, but one that truly deserves more attention. Acceleration is coming into favor again, so that will help tremendously. My 1st grade example is a triffle- almost cute. But it's not cute when the child begins to misbehave instead of quietly entertaining himself and it's not cute when the 1st grader does not learn how to learn until high school or even later when he gives up in frustration because he's never had to exert himself and learn before (consider Dweck's work in the context of gifted children.) Also, how many gifted children are being medicated for ADD I wonder?

Iowacommute, you will get a lot of differing opinions and suggestions and you will have to wade through all the advice and pick and choose what you think will be best. Although children who test in the highest percentiles have some traits in common they have a lot of individual characteristics as well. My own are like night and day.

Our school's workshop for parents of gifted and talented kids says high intelligence doesn't predispose children to social awkwardness and/or lack of common sense. They said that is a myth. They also said that in fact, highly intelligent children are more commonly ahead of their peers in social skills because their intelligence helps them recognize the emotions of others and learn appropriate reactions more quickly. That was what I saw as a frequent volunteer, but I am not an elementary school teacher and have no idea what the research says. Anyway, you and your daughter's teacher would know more than any of us about your daughter's social skills.

I would not be surprised at all if the research showed that pullout programs don't advance children academically. In fact I doubt they do. Anecdotally, though, I will say that my kids loved their pullout programs. They loved them. That was my son's favorite part of the school day, and that's from a kid who dearly loved recess. I asked the teacher why he loved the program so much and she said those kids loved being with kids like themselves. They get each other's jokes, they don't have to wait so long for everyone to catch up, etc. The pullout programs kept my son *engaged* at school, gave him something to look forward to and made school a positive experience for him. So if your elementary school offers pullout programs don't dismiss them out of hand as being useless no matter what the research shows.

Abby Krug made a very good point that the second conference in the spring is very helpful. You will know more about your daughter's overall success in the classroom, socially, academically, emotionally, at the spring conference. October conference will help but the spring information will be better. It is possible you can confer with the principal in the spring about an appropriate first grade placement for your daughter. Kindergarten placement is often luck of the draw but for first grade they have more information to make a better teacher/student/classroom match.

It might be helpful if you could talk to high school parents of high test scoring kids and get some idea of the resources available in the upper grades. For one thing, that would help you know if your school system has experience with kids like your daughter.

You don't have to rush into a decision. You have plenty of time to gather and filter information. Enjoy those kindergarten days, they are so fun.

An important thing to remember at this point in time is that this little girl has not even been deemed gifted yet so no discussion about GT programs is really pertinent. It is far better to be under stimulated than pushed to be something you may not be. It seems every parent of young children is focused on figuring out how gifted their child is . It is a very dangerous epidemic.

Before going to the principal, ask her teacher what she thinks is going on. Listen to her, get the test scores and compare them to the class as a whole for you may be surprised to see how alike all kids her age your DD is, observe your daughter at recess and lunch and see how she fits in and ask the school social worker for help with engaging your child in liking school.

I read this year's ago and loved it then and still do now.

http://www.creativitypost.com/psychology/is_your_child_ungifted

I always tell kids that diligence trumps intelligence every time.

Dweck makes the point that children must learn to work hard and persevere and the enemy of that process is lavishing children with praise for their outcomes as opposed to their effort and perseverence. What happens when a child never has to exert herself to master the subject matter? It happens. How do you learn to study and persevere and overcome frustration when the first time you find the need is junior year AP Calc? How do you learn to take your ideas and interests and build upon those if all your time is spent completing assignments that are meaningless to you because you don't need them to master the subject, but you need them to get a good grade? Dilligence trumps intelligence- intelligence plus dilligence is a beautiful thing though.

Here's a thought: is your child pulling your strings, so to speak? She says she's bored, and you and your DH immediately sit up and pay attention, searching for new alternatives to keep her from being bored. You said you believe she's intelligent - intelligent kids know how to work their parents.

Believe me, I know whereof I speak. I have two sons. Son #1 was of average intelligence, but son #2 was gifted. Intellectually, socially, athletically. He was placed in gifted classes when he was in second grade and stayed there until high school, at which point our system did not offer gifted services. He was president of his class in high school, all four years.

DH and I were thrilled with son #2 as he excelled in all ways. We supported him, pushed him, rewarded him, and spoiled him. Did he work us to achieve things/privileges he wanted? Of course he did. He knew how.

This is something you might consider with your daughter. Looking back now, I wish I had understood this better while son #2 was young. DH and I did not expect him to be smarter than us at such an young age. He was. And still is, of course.

Slow down. Think. Get the test results. Then plan.

Why is everyone worried about boredom? We have spent the last few decades over stimulating our youth to the extent that no new movies are released just remakes and bad sequels. TV shows are tedious. New and interesting literature is almost non existent and kids can not sit still. Boredom leads to daydreaming and daydreaming leads to creativity. Maybe just maybe, if we allowed the extremely intelligent child, or even the average one, who finishes work without effort and with time on her hands to be bored perhaps in this non stimulated moment is when they will begin thinking of the next great plot for a book, or even the cure for cancer.

^ ^ This ^ ^

I was out of step most of elementary school. Got opportunities for acceleration, got mentored by good teachers to do stuff on my own and outside of school, got enrichment after school as best my parents could find and access in our rural area back before "gifted" was a thing. I survived. I would imagine you can do all of the above, have your kid tested, find ways to enrich her mind outside of school, etc. No guarantee you'll do any better than the school does at meeting her academic needs. No guarantee that a private school will be better either. Maybe yes, maybe no, but there is no magic in "private" it just depends on who is running the school and how it is organized and what they do there, they all vary. Good luck and have fun!! I would love to have an old soul kid and I would not worry too much about such a child if you nurture whatever you can in them. They may not take the traditional path, but it will be an interesting one, no doubt. You will learn right along with them.

Well I know that no one here knows me, but when I say I was bored in school that was exactly where I learned to manipulate my teachers and parents. I also honed my skills in regards to skipping school. So when you're talking about someone with a personality like mine yes there is a danger there. I won't go into the other things. Although DD has a more gentle nature than I.
Also her teacher promised us she would give DD harder tasks and has yet to do that and tells us her volleyball season is ramping up so shes been busy. It looks as if the very least I will continue what I have been doing.

Iowa, I understand what you are saying-- reading between the lines, I will say I was a similar kind of student. I manipulated and toyed with my teachers -- and I got myself into a lot of (minor) trouble. In 7th grade they plucked me out of the "bad class" and put me in accelerated classes. It made a difference but I was still a handful through high school.

That said, this is kindergarten. So much of what is learned at this age IS social. I think you are wise to keep your eye on how it is going and to know what your daughter is learning (and not learning) so that you can supplement and enrich but at this stage, I strongly recommend against home schooling. I think it's important to let your daughter learn to interact with kids from different backgrounds and with different abilities.. and to learn how to deal with things like boredom. She is clearly an intelligent, driven and curious child, she'll keep moving forward.

Personally I would not be pleased with the teacher who told me that she didn't have time to differentiate and meet the needs of her kindergarteners because she was busy with a volleyball team. As a parent that would really put my back up and tell me a lot about where the teacher's priorities were.

It would have been better if the teacher had not mentioned volleyball and simply told the parent it would take her some time before she could prepare the harder work.

However, it's September so school has only been in session for 5 or 6 weeks maybe? It's kindergarten. The teacher is probably still trying to get some of her parents to send in paperwork, to send in their kids' epipens and inhalers (I have a friend who is an elementary school nurse). She probably had to teach some of her kids how to stand in line and sit in circle time. She probably is still explaining the lunch room system to a parent or two. She's had to meet with her room mom and get her students' work ready for curriculum night. She probably has to do beginning of the school year assessment and reporting on her kids and has to get their assessments and portfolio done for October conferences. She may not even have book buddies organized yet. She may not have her library volunteers organized yet.

It's early days to be making assumptions about the kindergarten teacher's priorities.

So let me describe back to school night which was touted as a very big deal. We go in her class and find well let's call her Mrs. Bubbly. Mrs. Bubbly tells my DD about the exciting package with all sorts of surprises and goodies which DD looks around and sees other kids opening. We watch as DD goes from table to table looking for her name. Finally she comes back and says "Mrs. Bubbly I couldn't find my name." Mrs. Bubbly goes to look, checks her roster aND sees DD'S name, and says "I must have forgotten you." DD being the happy go lucky kid is happy enough with the blank folder Mrs. Bubbly then gave her.

Also lining the halls were these big care packages for new students and yup DD didn't get one.

Mrs. Bubbly asked for classroom snacks two weeks later for quiet time. I go to the store the next day and buy enough snacks to last the whole class for two weeks and drop them off at school that day. Sure it would have been lovely if I would have received a note Mrs. Bubbly received them but at least confirmed with DD they made it to class. So two days later Mrs. Bubbly sends out an email saying they will no longer have quiet time. Gah.

The next week we have a parent night which was cut very short because of a volleyball game. I asked Mrs Bubbly if there was anything she or us could do to give DD some more challenging or interesting things in class. She said since they have tablet time but not enough tablets for everyone we could have DD bring in her own tablet so she could send more challenging assignments to the apps they use. Mrs. Bubbly made it sound like they spend half of the day on the tablets and only communicate through text so I told my MIL (retired elementary teacher) if DD is going to be taught by a tablet we will buy her the best tablet we can. So DH and I went out the next day and bought her a very nice tablet with loads of memory because of the apps they use. Mrs. Bubbly assures us the tablets will go home every night so we can go over the work in the apps and they can charge. They never come home and Mrs. Bubbly's excuse is she has two leave early two or three days a week for volleyball practice so forgets to give the kids their tablets. Also when she leaves early the kids are spit up into other classrooms for the last hour of the day.

I can understand missing a name on a roster and being busy, but this lady's is in her second year of teaching and only talks about volleyball when we see her. DH jokes she only teachers to feed her volleyball habit.

You may have gotten the short stick in teacher straws. This might happen many more times throughout your DD's education. Even the best teacher for one child is also the worst placement for another. I think you have to remember you yourself stated your DD loves her and In kindergarten that is foremost for success. Working with teachers we do not like is a valuable lessen for parents too. I look at it like working for a boss I do not care for... I also looked at it like that when as a teacher I disliked a parent. It is a part of life and always will be.

Most schools now do use tablets in pre k and up in my area, but there is one for each child in each class provided by the school that never leaves the school until they are in fifth grade. All testing and assessments are done paperless for the most part now in elementary schools. I never see everything my elementary daughter does on a daily basis at school, they discourage parents helicoptering over every aspect of the child's education and want their work to be truly independent and that is one reason the iPads and later chromebooks remain at school only. Another is they would not want a young child traveling back and forth with such an expensive responsibility. I might prefer it stay at school and just link it via a cloud with another device at home if you feel you must review all her work.

If your teacher's style is what is making your daughter unhappy for maybe she is more accustomed to organization and the scattered style of Ms Bubbly leaves her unsettled than that should be addressed first with the teacher and than if no follow up or improvements are made than address it with the administration. Both teachers and administrators respect the parent who always tries to work with the teacher solely initially and only involve higher ups after an acceptable amount of time was allotted for progress. The things you have complained about are happening to possibly up to 28 other parents and children( hopefully the class is under twenty but legally it might not be) so if she is that bad there will be others complaining too and hopefully the teacher will adjust her style for the whole.

You can ask for a class move but most systems really frown upon that. There would have to be a really important reason for it and what you have listed about your daughter being bored in kindergarten and the teacher's style are not enough to warrant the disruption of many other children and teachers. good luck.

Another home schooling parent here. We live in rural Canada with only two nearby schools, the public school and the "separate" Catholic school, which is the same curriculum with additional religious content. We had lived overseas for our eldest's K year and came home to find that Grade 1 here was doing less than K overseas. Our daughter was in tears everyday. Moving for more school choice wasn't an option once we were back home. The school wouldn't make any changes and provincial school system doesn't believe in letting kids advance or in holding them back if they need it; and they teach to the middle, so the kids at the top and bottom are out of luck. They are also big on preaching self-esteem, a top down affair which leads children to believe they're special just because they are, instead of the self-confidence which comes from within from a legitimate job well-done, whether it's helping to make dinner or doing a good job in a math assignment.

We started off with our eldest in first grade in a very similar situation to yours. The school kept talking about "gifted and talented" though really I think at that age, all kids are at the very least bright and motivated. They're sponges and will suck up as much as you give them. We could see the light going out in our eldest's eyes. Plus it's been my own experience that bright and motivated kids whose minds aren't properly occupied will find something else, usually not as good, to occupy themselves -- nature abhors a vacuum. We didn't plan to home school but fell into it, and it has worked for us. I considered trying to change the system for about a week, and then realized that the best use of my time and energy was to help my kids, not spending time trying to fix a system no-one would acknowledge needed at the very least some tweaking. Maybe your area is different and your school system more amenable to change. And with home schooling you can, if you're dedicated and observant, encourage your child's strengths and work on the weaknesses. If your child is on track to cure cancer, you will know what you need to know to prepare her for the college for their choice, whether it's particular courses or maybe an internship at a lab.

Interestingly, a lot of home schoolers in our area started because the parents had hated school. My husband and I came at it from the opposite direction -- we each loved school and excelled there. We wanted the same experience for our kids -- to love learning and want to continue as lifelong learners. I also wanted to give the kids an education similar to the private education we had growing up, and the local schools didn't (still don't) offer much in the way of grammar, spelling, or history.

When we started home schooling, only dial-up internet was available so the computer didn't play much of a role in our learning except for some online forums I used for advice and recommendations. We didn't make much use of co-ops because we're secular home schoolers unlike the majority of home schoolers in the area, and that affected most of the co-op subjects, like science, history, and literature. And it was fine without online learning or co-ops. What I did find useful are adults in the community who are experts in their various areas who have been mentors to the kids.

Also like you, I'm an introvert, and I've been raising and home schooling three extroverts; our eldest just graduated, and I have a 12th grader and 11th grader. I used to joke that we're not really home schooling because we're hardly ever home. The important thing, as with all parenting, is that we don't do what WE want as the parent but what's best for our kids; yes, I'd rather not deal with all the families and activities and stay home with a book, but for my kids' sakes we have explored a variety of interests (very few of which actually appealed to me!) and then concentrated on several. Yes, it's been exhausting for me, mentally, but that's what you do when you have kids. They have been in a variety of sports, excelling in several including curling -- they've won the local junior championship three years in a row and went to provincials (the equivalent of state championship) the other year. They've had art, piano, guitar, and voice lessons. They've been in several 4H clubs; one child has been to provincial 4H judging twice, and loves counselling at the summer camps, and one was chosen to be a provincial 4H ambassador. Two kids have been to the provincial music festival for speech arts and musical theatre when, frankly, the idea of being on stage in public makes me queasy. Two kids are in the provincial high school apprenticeship program to give them a head-start in college. One child is a dedicated birder (which didn't come from either parent!) who has completed the Cornell Lab Bird Biology home study course, and at the age of 14 established and moderates a Facebook page for our birders in our province which now has more than 6,000 members, and handles with aplomb the GW-worthy spats that can break out among adults who should know better. That same child also became president of the local naturalist society at the age of 18. They also do a lot of volunteer work in the community. The kids' favourite compliment from new people they meet is, "I can't believe you are/were home schooled."

It helps to be aware that home schooling in North America is much more common and popular than it was when we started 13 years ago, but it's still not common or popular. As we found with our family and friends (among whom are a number of public school teachers), our personal choice for our child/children was considered by them as a slap in the face to their choices, and a challenge to the status quo. Much like my cobalt blue 48" Bluestar, which has most people I know here puzzled. Why not a standard GE electric range from Best Buy like everyone else? Who do you think you are?!

You and your husband as the parents know your child and her needs best. That's pretty much the best starting point : ) . I think a lot of parenting is going with your gut and listening to your child. When we started, we said we'd try it for a year, and then re-evaluate every year. After a few years, we just kept going because it was working well for us. And even for parents not considering home schooling but with kids who are school age, I highly recommend the book Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers by Gordon Neufeld and Gabor Mate.

I'm available to message if you'd like more info. Good luck as you make your decisions!

I was one of those that tested at 1:1000 level, and school was boring. Even in college, I found it was what I put into learning (on what I wanted to learn)not really what the teacher was presenting. The teacher and class work were for tests, not umm learning (if you see what I mean).

I don't remember enough about my early years to know how to advise about that early.

I think that what I want to summarize is that your child will learn on his or her own, if resources are provided that allow that. It is a shame that our schools DO tend to teach to lowest common denominator. However, there's also the fact that I used to find errors in what the teachers were teaching. Do you think the most gifted and brilliant people are teachers? I think I would suggest that self-paced learning is the best place to concentrate on. Perhaps stay with the school system for social reasons?

One day a week is fun, wouldn't it be nice if it were every day! Will the 9 also be in the same classroom the other days? Or at least 4 on one, 5 in the other? Makes it a little easier for the teacher to differentiate, but at least the kids have peers and hopefully they can partner up.

Check out the Hoagie's Gifted website and Facebook group. Also Davidson discussion boards.

So nice that your school has programming from such an early grade all the way through high school. My DS just graduated, and his last math class (differential equations and the like) was such a fun group because they'd all been together for so long. The teachers at that level especially enjoy those classes. Our school had replacement classes for grade 3-8 for math and LA only, they were in the general population the rest of the day, but they really loved their math and LA. For a while they grouped all the middle school gifted students in one teaching team but still further differentiated for math and LA, but now it's more egalitarian.

DBarron-We're going to keep her in school because there are some aspects which I know benefit her, and this program I think will help her. She scored in the 99% for reading and math on all three standardized tests in K. She especially loves math and science and is going to very quickly outpace me in those.

Bpathome- I don't know if the 9 will be in the same regular class. It would be nice if there was at least one other one though.

I was reading through the program packet, and the school will offer honors classes starting in middle school and honors, accelerated, time with a gifted teacher in high school.

While I believe gifted programs may not accelerate her to be a world renowned scientist I can't imagine it would hurt. I'm also hoping being with a teacher that has more time for her will keep her interested and motivated in school.

The gifted director today mentioned gifted kids tend to be perfectionists and are hard on themselves. I can see that in her already as well as myself. She said the gifted teachers are trained in helping the kids work through those issues so I think there could be many benefits and will hopefully help her to be a healthy, confident person. If she could be as awesome as she is now but without some of the faults she shares with me than I have no doubt she will be successful in whatever she chooses.

Gifted education isn't about accelerating people to be world-changers, of course, but to meet their needs as students. So glad your school has teachers with training in gifted ed! Having a teacher or counselor who "gets them" makes all the difference.

Thank you for the reminder (no snark, I say that honestly) because thr program director said a few times today the program is really for kids in need of certain things like academic challenges and have a real love for learning.

I will need to remind myself it is a program to help her have a better education. I'll be honest though when I saw the results I patted myself on the back a bit. Being a SAHM and putting my career on hold I finally felt there was a measurable reward. I don't know if that makes me kind of crappy, but honestly it's how I felt. So yes the reminder it is for her is very good for me to repeat to myself.

If it makes you feel any better, I was bored, got into quite a bit of trouble in school and didn't exactly excel academically because I lacked discipline. Classic problems a "gifted" kid would have but when I grew up there was no such thing. I made it through relatively unscathed, was nurtured by some great folks, teachers and others, including my parents, found my passion, learned how to focus and now work in academia. Just keep lovin' up on your kid, she'll make it!

Yes, dbaron, some of "the most gifted and brilliant people are teachers".

We had the same issue with my oldest daughter. She skipped 1st grade, but 2nd grade was still too easy for her academically. She struggled with "executive function skills," though, like remembering which folder to use, where to turn in her papers, etc. At that age, her reading tests showed she was at the 8th grade level, but I don't know how much stock I put into tests. Mid year, I pulled her out to homeschool her.

We homeschooled for a few years. I was very happy we did even though the social aspect was a HUGE struggle. We are surrounded by groups who HS for religious reasons. The co-op classes were either very far (and I had other young children) or based on religion (which affected everything, but esp. science). Same with the social groups-- they'd have you sign a statement of faith to join. My daughter isn't esp. social, though, and she loved being able to learn what she wanted on her terms.

When I was pregnant with my 5th child, my daughter and I decided it would be better for her to go to school. She didn't skip when she went back, though she really regrets it now as a HS sophomore. (Her choice.) I knew that with so many young children, I wouldn't be able to give her what she needed, esp. since the social part was such a problem. She returned to school with zero issues and was still way ahead academically.

Anyway, my point is that if 1st grade doesn't work out, you can always HS for a few years, even a year. For her, the benefits were tremendous. No one says it has to be forever!

You can always start supplementing with Stanford Pre-College classes online (formerly EPGY.) They have a fantastic math program starting in 1st grade. Can get pricey, though.

Rita, thank you for the note about the online classes. DD really likes doing workbooks and similar apps for her tablet. She told us the other day she has the most fun when she's learning.

Intellectual stimulation is a drive in gifted children. Imagine having a gifted athlete and all the exercise she ever got was PE.