Alzheimer's question
Pawprint
7 years ago
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Alzheimer's is SO difficult!!
Comments (13)I agree that sometimes moving to an AD Facility is a symptom of a downturn and not the cause. IMO, though, it can also be a cause. Many people move to an AD facility when theyÂre already experiencing a downturn, and sometimes major change in their lives can cause a downturn. ThereÂs no way to know for sure. My dad landed in the ICU for a couple of weeks, transitioned to a full-blown nursing home for a couple of months, then moved into an assisted living facility. He experienced a major downturn. Any or all of these things could have contributed. But I do know this: he felt very angry and betrayed by having to give up his old life, his car, his dog and his freedom. He resented the transition from independent adult to child. This kind of stress can, and often does, cause a decline in AlzheimerÂs patients. When my father moves to the dementia ward, he will lose his last bit of freedom, which is so very important to him. I anticipate another decline. But heÂs in a decline right now, and a lot of the fight has gone out of him lately. The move may not impact him much. I hear yÂall about the whole "my grandmother had AlzheimerÂs" thing. We always think of our grandparents as elderly, but can remember our parents as the young, confident rulers of our universe they once were. A spouseÂs illness is a whole other level entirely. ThereÂs also an enormous difference between being a full-time caregiver, a part-time caregiver like I am, and a visitor (which is what most people luckily are). Although most of my friends have been extremely supportive and sympathetic, they cannot truly empathize. Most people left the room with their grandparent needed a fresh diaper and turn pale at the mere mention of a colostomy bag. Emotional baggage aside, itÂs very different being responsible for your loved one. WeÂre the ones who make medical and legal decisions on their behalf, get phone calls from the hospital, and manage their finances. ThatÂs why IÂm so deeply appreciative of the people on this forum. YÂall donÂt just say you understand, you really, truly get it....See MoreArticle in the Los Angeles Times about ping-pong and Alzheimers
Comments (2)My husband who had AZ had a brain scan and the result was part of his brain had atrophied. It could never get better, that part of his brain was dead. Nothing helps Alzheimer patients. The meds they give them are all experimental, never been proven to help....See MoreCan you help with Alzheimer's Question?
Comments (18)Thank you all so much for your input and support. The two biggest issues we are now addressing are those posed by some of you: Guardianship and Finances. As with any family and situation like this, you can imagine that there is much more going on than what I am able to express here. Families are complicated and this family IS complicated. The facility that she is in now has finally come to acknowledge that they can not just release her - they have said she is unable to make decisions regarding her medical care. Now we need to get two doctors to sign off that she is incompetent before proceeding with the guardianship. Determining who will be the guardian is quite tricky at this point because she is involved in a few legal issues that play into the short and long term affect of the decision. That will be hashed out hopefully in the next few days. If she is deemed incompetent the question arises as to whether she can proceed forward in her legal battles - most, probably initiated by her severe lack of decision making abilities which is a symptom of the disease - and whether it is in her best interest to do so. She is the one who initiated some of the legal issues. Others are the result of her behavior and forgetfulness. Like I said...it's complicated. Once some of these legal issues and guardianship is determined, than we can get more of the financial picture in focus. Thank you Graywings for linking the government retirement and the federal disability links. We believe she is under the older system; but as you said it needs to be confirmed as she did have the ability to switch over to the newer one at some point. We are learning more about her diagnosis which was originally known as Pick's disease. The symptoms fall into two patterns and her's is in the behavioral pattern which shows as impulsive, inappropriate social behavior, lack of social tact, loss of insight into their own behavior or others, repetitive or compulsive behavior to name a few. The other pattern type involves the language skills in understanding speech and such - she is not so much affected by this pattern. It is believed that the disease starts in the 30's and 40's which makes us now think that what we thought was a possible personality disorder had actually been early signs of this Alzheimer's. There has been a history of unusual behavior (as observed by outsiders but denied in general by most of the immediate family). She has definitely been told repeatedly by numerous people that she has Alzheimer's disease but is not able to make the connection as to the consequences. She will insist that the doctors are crazy and argue about every little thing, whether it pertains to the discussion or not. And then she will quite nonchalantly say "I have Alzheimer's, what's the big deal let me out and go back to work". Hopefully when they find the correct level of medication for her, she will be able to voice her desires. We feel strongly that her young teen son have access to her if he desires as the past few years have been turbulent for all concerned. Thank you again for all your info, recommendations on facilities, and especially the support. I will keep you posted. It will not be an easy road but I will look at this as a growth experience. The thing that has hit home hard is, without parents around any longer - WE are the adults we used to turn to for advice! With much appreciation, Chris...See MoreDimentia or Alzheimers
Comments (22)You say your FIL and MIL are living alone? with just daytime help? Not good. Especially if she's starting to have physical problems. Let me just tell you a couple of stories--not to terrify you, but to open your eyes. An older couple my husband knew were living alone like that. One day he visited, and found the woman totally black and blue--all bruised up from head to toe. She'd promised to keep her husband home--then one night, she woke in the middle of the night, to find her husband battering her with something heavy (I forget what)--he thought she was an intruder--she was badly injured and, of course, had to put him in a home at that point. It's not unusual for Alzheimer's patients to think their loved ones were strangers (and evil ones at that). Another couple I know--he has Azheimers, and one day she had a major stroke. Thank goodness he was able to call for help--but he didn't do it right away, and she's in really bad shape--will be months in a rehab facility, if not longer. Another Azheimer's couple? The husband was injured. The wife called her daughter's work (thank goodness, again)--because she 'couldn't remember the number for 9-11'. What would MIL do if FIL left the house in the middle of the night? Would she be able to follow him and get him home? What if she had a medical problem? Are you certain he'd be able to get her help? and you really cannot predict how the disease will progress. He could be one person today, and someone totally different tomorrow. Please, don't allow your parents to be alone at this point in time. If you can't convince them to move to an assisted living facility, then you need to start having younger family members stay with them. Or another alternative that might work well for you--how about hiring one of the ladies (usually from one of the islands) to come in and live with them. You can go through an agency, so that they're checked out, they're very reasonable. Usually they can stay for about 6 months on their work visa, then they often have a friend or relative who can come and take over until they're eligible to return....See MorePawprint
7 years agoPawprint
7 years agolast modified: 7 years agochisue
7 years agolast modified: 7 years ago
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