John here are my recommendations. Maintain current height for now until it goes dormant for winter rest. Then next spring with you see signs it is starting to turn green, scalp it down to 1 inch and bag all the debris. I will warn you it will look like crap with nothing but stems and twigs. As soon as you see it starting to recover and green up a bit after scalping, apply your first of 3 yearly fertilizer applications. Be sure to water the fertilizer in. Then maintain the lawn at 1-1/2 to 2 inches with a rotary mower with a good sharp blade. Zoysia is a very tough grass and hard on lawn mower blades so keep the blade sharp. Otherwise you will just tear the grass and it will look brown on the tips and spoil the color, not to mention open it up for pest and disease issues. If you use a reel mower maintain at 3/4 to 1-1/2 inches with sharp blades. Lastly fertilize only 3 times per season spaced 8 to 10 weeks apart. DO NOT over fertilize Zoysia. Good luck and don't forget to check in next year and let us know how it went.

One of my closest friends lives two blocks from me and has a daughter just a few months older than my DD, they are both 9 right now. Of course in the beginning we thought how fun for the four of us to do things together. We'd get together at each other home for coffee and bring the girls to play together. Always invited the other's daughter to birthday parties. Finally we recognized, these two don't click. Yeah, they *can* get along, and play together respectfully, there is no conflict. But they would not initiate playing together, after a while they get bored with each other, have nothing else to talk about, and generally think the other is "strange." My friend planned a party for her daughter's most recent birthday. At some point in a conversation she just said to me, "I hope you aren't offended, but B didn't put C on her guest list." She considered inviting C (my DD) anyway, b/c of our friendship. But decided the girls are old enough to choose their own friends. I was absolutely NOT offended. I see as well as she does that these girls do not click. My own DD would not be interested in B's party, she would declare the whole affair "too girly." Sure, she'd behave and be polite, but she'd be disinterested and want to leave as soon as possible. I agree that kids must learn to get along with all personalities and special needs. You never know what surprises await in new people, and you have to get to know them to find out. My kids' friends reflect different cultures, religions, and special needs and just plain quirks. One of DS#2's closest friends is deaf, wears cochlear implants, and it can be very frustrating to communicate with him. But the boys are together almost every day and make it work. We had some neighbors who drove my kids nuts, but I talked to them about how to make it work for at least a little while from time to time. I didn't make them play every time the boy rang our doorbell, but I didn't let them avoid the boy if they were all outside. Despite the fact that he could trip while walking, I encouraged my boys to give him skates and sticks they've outgrown to let him play street hockey with them... b/c he just wants to learn what they're doing. He had some learning disability and didn't socialize well, either. I did give my kids instructions on how to talk to him, to be direct and clear, literal with their words. He didn't get "between the lines." They needed to learn that, but when playing with him was all work on their part, they don't need to develop it any further. They did their part, but don't need to be responsible for his socialization. At the same time, kids deserve to have their feelings respected. If they say they don't want a close friendship with a person, it need not be forced for the purpose of life lessons. Especially when it is based on having spent time with the person and learning that they don't have a lot in common. We can learn to get along with everyone, but that's not the same as investing emotions and time into a friendship. Mom2emall's DS can learn to make it work when they are together, but should have his feelings respected and not be pushed to host playdates. Also, no kid needs to be the object of a "pity friendship." The other child deserves to be in a friendship with kids who have common interests and have fun being with him, who like him for who he is; not with kids who are with him so parents can teach them to be friends with people who are "different." That's condescending. The friendship my DS has with his friend who is deaf works b/c DS really has fun with the boy, not b/c DS is being charitable. It works b/c of mutual interests and complementary personalities... the way friendships are supposed to work. They really are quite a pair! Incidentally, the met b/c his mom and I were friends first, too. However, the boys' friendship as surpassed ours! They just hit it off the first time they met. Picking your own friends and getting along with (almost) everyone is not mutually exclusive. When the families are together let your DS know that it is a short time and they can find something to do that works for everyone. Regarding requests for playdates, I would agree to have the boy over if it helped my friend out with her schedule. But I think I'd just be honest, decline and say "I really wish our boys hit it off better, and maybe they will when they get older."

Hi Everyone! Thanks all for your concern. I'm not sure what to post, except, I'm quite certain it's MUCH better. He hasn't shown any aggression towards my son in several weeks. He didn't show any aggression towards my daughter either for about 3 weeks but then just recently, he snapped at her. We do take him running. He runs several miles a few times a day. We all run at different times during the day, so he goes on 2-3 runs per day. I take him at around 6a.m., at least one of my kids takes him after school and/or plays fetch with him and then my husband takes him in the evening. He gets PLENTY of exercise. I run the least, which is about 3-4 miles in the morning and on occasion 5 or more miles. I also took him to the vet. The vet is concerned, so he has a dog trainer that is planning to come by. I also contacted the local dog training school, who has not yet returned my phone call or email. BUT, my dog is doing better. I just don't have the heart to take him back to the shelter. He came from a shelter near by, which I believe is VERY good and everyone cares about the animals. They told me he won't get along with other dogs but were sure he would get along well with people. And by all accounts, he did until we brought him home. Remember, we visited him a few times at the shelter and he as great. I am sure that if we take him back,he will be euthanized and that idea is just too heartbreaking. My dog has some very loving qualities and such great charm.

I am in the same situation. It’s New Years Day and I am lying here depressed. My adult son came to temporarily live with me and my new husband of 2 years about 7 months ago. He asked and my husband said yes. My husband decided not to charge him rent or anything, even told him he can eat what we eat, wash clothes, basically our home is his home. We have a written agreement which we all signed. My son takes out the garbage and cuts grass, clean his room & bathroom. He’s making plans to move back out as agreed. He has savings. Is my son perfect? No, but he is not disrespectful. Other than not walking around the house naked, nothing else has changed in our marital relationship. My husband took it upon himself to step in as a father to my son and even asked my son if that was ok. His biological father…didnt do his job and has no real relationship with him. My husband and son get along fine. However i know my husband is faking it. If my son makes one mistake or forget something, my husband is very critical and judgemental. He complains to me telling lies about my son and says hateful things about my son. i love my husband but this is unacceptable to me. i am beyond hurt and angry. My son doesnt even know how my husband really feels. What brought to this post…my husband thought my son had left and left the door unlocked at 2am. My son was actually outside. Anyway all i literally said was to tell him and immediately he accused me of coming to my son’s defense and starts going off. I am confused. If someone does something wrong or forgot something, isnt the natural thing to do is tell them? What did I say wrong? There is so much more I could say to paint the picture of everything that has gone on. I dont want a divorce but this is too crazy!