Need to vent

numbersjunkie

So my son is getting married soon. To a man. I have no family left but always felt like my husband's family was like my own. Found out today that one member would not be coming to the wedding. His wife, my husband's sister, was coming alone. There was no explanation given, and so I assume it is because my son is gay. I feel so angry. This couple are the godparents to our daughter. Thankful they are not the godparents to our son. They were named as guardians should anything happen to my husband and I when the kids were younger. I feel sick to my stomach. I want to cut ties with this person. His kids are "perfect" of course. Good for him. Thanks for letting me vent.

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eld6161

You can't control how others feel. It's their loss. Take a deep breath and try to move past it.

You have lots to celebrate, don't let this spoil your joy.

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numbersjunkie

Just want to say that I confirmed with my husband that the reason BIL is not attending is because he is not "comfortable" with the gay marriage thing. Maybe I should have refused to attend his daughters first wedding because I was not "comfortable" with the guy she married who turned out to be abusive.

I hope I can do what the previous poster suggested and move past this. Not sure that's possible but it's something to strive for.

I am happy that my son is happy. I don't see this as a life choice on his part. Its not his "fault" or his "choice". This is just who he is. As a parent, I love my children unconditionally. I hope none of BIL's grandchildren turn out to be gay.

Thanks again for letting me vent.

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gellchom

I'm sorry that your BIL is behaving like this and I hope you can minimize the headspace you give it at this wonderful time. I'm glad his wife is coming.

Congratulations to you all on your son's marriage! May they have many happy years. Best wishes for a wonderful wedding.

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hounds_x_two

I am sorry BIL's decision is causing distress. Have a joyful time with your son and the rest of the family. Best wishes to the happy couple!

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Suzieque

You "assumed", then you "confirmed with your husband". How does your husband know? Did anyone get the information from the BIL? Or did you both just assume or get info 2nd or 3rd hand?

IF that is his reason, Ok fine. You won't miss him. Everyone's entitled to his or her opinion, even if it doesn't jive with the current atmosphere.

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nancylouise5me

You are right when you say being Gay is not a choice. It is who you are, you are born that way. As people are born with blue eyes and blonde hair, simple as that. I wouldn't let the bil's attitude take away from your son's happiness and wedding. I wouldn't even discuss his absence. He is not important, your son and his new husband are. Concentrate on doing things for the wedding. When thoughts of the bil start creeping in find something to do to help out. There are always things to do with upcoming Weddings! Congratulations to your son and to you! I'm sure there will be lots of fun, joy, and love at his Wedding.

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