I can understand that. I would be concerned, too, after having raised 3 boys and a husband. We just put in a white kitchen with a stained island. We didn't want the island painted as that is what we think gets the most beat up. The good news about white is smudges and finger prints and bits of last night's dinner (yikes, yes, guilty) show up and are quickly cleaned, as opposed to our prior MO of just ignoring it because we could.

Also, maybe a 2 tone kitchen would work - you can get the white up top and the kids can run their toys into the lower half. Dents and scratches seem to more easily disappear on stained woodwork.

We did install a white kitchen 25 years ago -- with kids riding their trikes through the house. Most of the damage occurred from people delivering range, fridge, etc., knobs on corner doors being whacked into the door next to it, and water damage (e.g. coffee maker steam or overflow mishaps.)

My kids are 4, 8, and 11 and we just finished remodeling our kitchen and chose white painted cabinets. I've definitely had to wipe down the base cabinet doors a few times in the past 2.5 months, but at least I can see the issues! I LOVE our dark gray painted island, but a small part of me thinks we should have done an opaque stain instead. We'll see how it holds up. Our cabinet maker stands behind his stuff.

Thank you everyone! We've thought about doing the 2-tone look, but we just don't love it unless we could have an island. Alas, we have a galley, so the island is a no-go. We're going to try to find a stain we like (because we know if we get it right the kitchen will be a stunner!), but we'll go with white if not.

I have always had white kitchens (we have moved a lot) with small children. No problems. I think it is worth doing a little research on the finish. Many here will advocated for a factory finish rather than site-painted for durability and that is consistent with my experience.

As long as our 4 year old messy son has been living, we've only had all white cabs with all white counters! It's fine. I freely admit that we have a housecleaner come every 2 weeks who wipes them down. But honestly it's rare that I have to follow up to clean any particular mess. Our cabs are flat slab ikea cabs, so I wonder if shaker and other styles with raised edges are more inclined to get grey muck on them?

The funny thing for me is that I have to do a major spot check every time my 73 year old dad visits - because he's the one with the problem. It's only in the last 15 years that mom and I have determined he's probably a little aspergers and literally does not notice that he leaves a trail of peanut butter and jelly around the house on a daily basis. I will spare you the details of the time he spilled some industrial solvent on her brand new Viking oven and then proceeded to use the wrong clear that stripped the entire finish off the whole thing. Horrible. My poor mom has always wanted a white kitchen with a marble slab countertop, but knows that it would be shot to hell in days because he is not to be trusted. But I digress! White for the normal among us is just fine!

My daughter has two boys and a SAHH so her kitchen gets a real beating. We handprinted her cabinets with gloss, oil base paint and it has really held up well - we did it about 8 years ago when the boys were 5 and 7. The great thing about handprinted, is that one can easily touch up a bad ding, where with factory sprayed finish, that is not easy or successful.

She also has white Corian countertops and a white very large, integrated Corian sink. They get a real beating as her husband makes multiple french press pots of coffee each day, forgets them, dumps the grounds in the sink (and leaves them there) and then makes a new pot. Both sink and counters look like new.

Do keep metal toys out of your kitchen as small MatchBox cars can make some pretty serious dings in cabinets. When my children were small, we had toys that had "designated areas" where they could "live" - it worked.

I have a 4 year old and 1 year old. Both are mild-mannered kids, not Captain Destructos. My white cabinets were installed and painted on-site by one of the best custom trim teams in Minneapolis. And yet, my white cabinets did show wear within a few months of move-in. After living there for two years, all of the end-of-run cabinets (especially the island display shelves) had chipped enamel.

As much as I love LOVE love all white cabinets, I will not do them again because the worn-looking enamel always bugged me. We're building a new house now and I'm doing wood-stained lowers and a mix of white and wood uppers.

White lowers also show spills worse, but I consider this a benefit -- if a stain blends in, I don't notice it and it goes uncleaned. Until I have guests...then I suddenly notice it and it HAUNTS ME. ;)