I remember another member who had the same issue. I think in the end she decided that her white window trim didn't match her off white cabinets, was right next to it, and it was just fine. My light fixture (wood) is painted my trim slightly brown white, and is against the peachy whitish ceiling. In the right light you can see the difference clearly. Sometimes it all just looks white. It never looks bad. I think the thing to do is look at the two colors (trim and what you might prefer for a cabinet) as close together as they'll be IRL and see what you think. If its total gag time, don't do it. If it doesn't bother you as you walk by, don't worry about it.

White next to cream is a classic look and will be fine. However, if you don't like it, just take a cabinet door and have them color match it for your trim.

Seconding function, the kitchen and bathroom cabinets don't need to match, in color or style, and generally do not. It can be difficult making any changes to a late parent's home -- give yourself some time and don't worry about it. I can't recommend any shades of white paint, but you might find it helpful to pop into the Kitchen forum and read through the archives or ask for suggestions there.

Silestone Calacatta Gold. The best location I found to purchase was Home Depot. They are not a good place to look. Better to go to local distributor in your city to see full slabs. Home Depot carries it under a different name, but if you tell them the brand Silestone they will know how to order. Home Depot will have sales of 20-25% off several times a year and they do not charge sales tax which every other location does. You can also ask Home Depot which installer they use and go there and see slabs. Good Luck.