I have trimmed trees for 45 years and after working on pine trees all day went into the bank. A lady behind me commented on the forest smell and how nice it was (along with my BO). There are some that seem to use the whole bottle and it is hard to breathe but perhaps that is just me as the dust over the years has made me sensitive.

I would have said "maybe you should move to another seat if you don't like sitting here".

(Edit to add - I hate scents, most especially in restaurants when an overly applied scent can kill one's taste buds. I have asked to be moved to a new table when the smell is overwhelming and the restaurant staff are always understanding of such a request.

Too many who wear scents use WAY TOO MUCH. For someone who rides a bus daily, I think it's simple common sense to avoid applying anything with a strong smell beforehand. The problem is, people who wear too much scent daily are desensitized to it and don't realize how pungent (and offensive) their odors are)

Not being quick witted, I usually just answer honestly and don't think of the clever responses until later - those things I wish I had said...

I'm sure I would have said I don't wear perfume. And I rarely do wear it, even though I have a couple I love that I wore daily at one time. Now that I work from home and am in and out of the house to yard and garden on any given day, I don't need hoards of little bugs coming to me looking for a deliciously scented meal ;)

I'm semi sensitive to scents and will get a headache being close to someone with a strong perfume. A walk down the pet food, or soaps section of the grocery store has me coughing, an annoying little tickle in my throat that doesn't stop as I'm trying to pay for my groceries at the check out. Not so sensitive though that I can think of ever being aware of someones deodorant, hair spray, personal hygiene products.

It's not the public's job, in a public place, to accommodate everyone with a "condition" that is affected by scents/fragrance/and any number or other things - it would be impossible to do that. It's their condition, so they need to take appropriate measures to avoid something that could be problematic - it's their responsibility. And they should have the manners to do it without being insulting or intimidating to others. "Rights" go both ways.

I would have told them the truth, that I was not wearing perfume.

But if I'd said I didn't wear perfume, they have may actually offended someone or tried to find out who it was? I'm thick enough skinned to say it to me. Actually, glad it was me and not someone else they were trying to bully!

I totally agree with being sensitive to scents, and wanting to avoid them, but also agree that it's a public place and up to them to take care of their problem.

It's good for us to giggle though. So I don't mind letting you in on their stupidity. Good comeback Jim. It's ok to have a pretend one. I tried hard not to say anything too rotten. Come to think of it, if I'd said, but I don't wear perfume, it might've come across as smarty pants? because that's who I am.

I would have said that I don't wear perfume as well. I do find that fewer and fewer people are wearing perfumes or scented deodorants and my eyes will let me know if someone is doing so.

I was in the grocery store a couple of months ago and the person in front of me had disposable diapers. I had to leave the line and find another one because the scent coming off of the diapers was so strong. As soon as I left the line my eyes stopped tearing up and were no longer itchy.

I think your response was fine or what linda said. There are some people who just have to complain and these two sound like folks who won't be happy no matter what. Who knows? Maybe they just like to see if they can get a reaction. It's possible the seat they were sitting in had residual perfume in it but they're not bright enough to determine the cause.

Maybe if you see them again, you can ask about their health. ;)

I, like many others here, have adverse reactions to scents. Laundry soap, body wash, shampoo, perfume.....many items will do it. I get an asthmatic reaction that starts with coughing. One time, on the train to work, I had an episode because someone in the car had too much perfume on. Someone close by offered me a cough drop. I had to explain it was asthma and I didn't have an inhaler with me. They were a bit more understanding after that but still.....

I too have reactions. I understand it. I really do. Why aren't you carrying around your inhaler (nebulizer? that's what they called theirs'), ma'am? I bet, with all my heart, you didn't complain loudly and open windows. I bet you tolerated the best you could until you could move or they/you got off. Those are things I would do. I really thought they were overboard even if it was true? Maybe it was me and one of my products? Could be.

When I asked the person who works in my division, and who has ridden the bus longer than I, she said they complain all the time and it was just today's target, to ignore them and that others likely did too this morning.

I would have hammed it up.

startled innocence: Moi? But I'm not wearing scent. My father always told me I was his little flower. I guess I still am!

Rob, I hate using an inhaler and have pretty successfully controlled it by focused breathing. I am pretty fortunate in that respect and try my best to avoid trigger situations. That instance was a double whammy because it was really cold and then perfume....BAM! Cold weather was the worst. Our trains didn't have windows that opened (think Amtrak type train) and I always sat near the door between cars to get fresh air whenever possible.

If they truly are that annoying, I hope they don't randomly tell people they are the source of their daily irritation. I'd have to give them a piece of my mind if that were the case!

Meh! Ignore these people. If they are truly asthmatic, their asthma is not well controlled if they need to use a 'rescue' inhaler (albuterol) often.

I remember that once someone standing close to me admired the perfume I was wearing. I drew a blank because I don't wear perfume, and that was my response. She looked as though she thought I was lying -- that I was unwilling to share the name of my perfume. Only later did it dawn on me that what she smelled was my SOAP. I had bathed that morning with a scented soap I'd brought home from a hotel stay. I think it was Emlin brand soap.

Having a similar problem at church, I have enjoyed reading the responses to this question. In a congregation of about 300 we have 3 or 4 ladies who have complained about fragrances until we have been asked to refrain from wearing them. I would say that most people have complied since I rarely detect any scent. However, just last week we had another e-mail asking us to refrain from wearing scented lotions, hand sanitizers, etc. I'm beginning to wonder what's next? My response to this has been the same as the one expressed by Grainlady. If you have a problem, you fix it. 300 people should not have to fix the problem of 3 or 4. In school we learned that "Your rights end where mine begin". Today we seem to have forgotten that.

DH doesn't wear perfume but for some reason bath soap smells strongly on him while it doesn't on me. I went as far as to ask him if he was rinsing thoroughly after soap and he thought I'd gone insane with my strange comment. I guess body chemistry is another factor to consider. Could be shampoo, hair spray, maybe even laundry detergent. Well, I guess the ladies in the bus got their way as we are thinking/talking about them. Who says complaining/whining doesn't pay? Ha

dees, you triggered one of my internal snappy comebacks. Close the window, cold air triggers my asthma! It really does, but I'd never say that to anyone for a five minute ride. Oh they're in everyone's face about their daily irritation. Today was exceptionally LOUD.

Nah, they didn't get their way because no one pointed them here ;) Maybe?

Maybe they're setting up the bus company for their own lawsuit and you'll be one of the people they point to as a culprit? I would have cheerfully said that I don't wear perfume, it was simply the truth.

I don't wear perfume as it gives me a headache and sometimes I have to wash off a lotion if it's too strong of a scent (then never use it again) but I would never ask anyone to change for me unless I couldn't possibly get away from them and it was life-threatening.

I don't understand why you didn't just say I don't wear perfume? That would have put these 2 busy bodies in their place.

I like how she asked you to not wear perfume, as if you have a standing date on the bus!

If she did indeed ask nicely, I would have said it wasn't me, and maybe that I am also sensitive to smells.

I really can relate to perfumes setting me off on many levels. It's awful when you can't escape it.

Perfumes, fabric softeners, deodrants, cold weather and dust mites take me out.

Cold weather gets me at first. After a bit of getting used to it, or exercising in it, I don't get "breathy".

Perfumes, after shave and other things don't really bother me. However, a dedicated smoker and the fragrance that is in their clothes and the air two feet around them is disgusting to me. Giving a dirty look or saying something would not change the way they are. It is most difficult in the check-out line and places like that. I try to keep my distance.

mimi, I do have asthma. I get triggers. I do. But no one else even smelled anything. And she only asked nicely after she and her obnoxious cohort had done every rude thing. We wouldn't even be having this giggle (to me) had she only asked nicely. I'm more irritated with the crude behavior than the request, no matter how offbase she was!

rob333, it is interesting that she asked you nicely!

Oh, humanity ;-)

"I was in the grocery store a couple of months ago and the person in front of me had disposable diapers. I had to leave the line and find another one because the scent coming off of the diapers was so strong."

I can't help but wonder how you knew the scent was from disposable diapers. Was the person wearing a disposable diaper? Or did the person have a package of them in their shopping cart?

Some of you seem to be twisting the intended meaning of "Your rights end where mine begin" as if it were a pretzel.

I have to chuckle at smokers who don't smoke in their cars because they don't want to have a "smoker's stink" in there....don't they realize that the yuckie smell is coming from their clothes, hair, skin? So unless they are driving around nekkid .....well even then they stink, so what they are doing is all in vane and they might as well just go ahead and smoke in their vehicle (hopefully with the windows up so they're not polluting the air the rest of us have to breathe.

gyr you mean when some expect them to suck it up and deal with the world around them, or do you mean when some are joking and say others think they're setting up the bus company for being sued, or can I get your phone number good lookin'? Or is it, that I've posted something that strikes a nerve? We're mostly kidding. We've all been stuck in a situation where we had no control. I seriously doubt any of us would truly do anything so awful about which we're kidding. Most all of us would NEVER act like they truly did. It was merely so funny as to be beyond making up, yet, they did. And it wasn't even justified. This time.

I don't know what I would say. I would be in such a state of shock, I would probably be speechless,,,, but would have loved to say "your noses must be playing tricks on you because I don't wear perfume." or, how about, If you weren't always sticking your nose in everyone else's business, perhaps it wouldn't be so out of whack.....I don't wear perfume. LOL

If you were not wearing perfume, say "I'm not wearing perfume. By the way, why are you exposing the public to your terrible infection."

It's official. I've become a Queen B. Had those comments, coughs, and theatrics been directed at me I would try to maintain some dignity at the time (which you more than accomplished), but the next day I would just love to get on the bus, soaked in perfume, scented lotion, body spray, scented hair spray, everything "sweet smelling" I could layer on my body...and then would have sat as close as possible to them.

It does sound like like they were being a bit precious. The world is full of smells and pollution so carrying on like this over some perceived scent is just rediculous. Why catch the bus at all if they find these things so overpowering? (and there is always going to be something in the air in such a confined space with other people). Perhaps they should stay indoors and in a hermetically sealed apartment, they might be happier :)

They and I have little choice, it's the bus which takes us from the train to our buildings. They're not on the bus today, and I'm so sorry. NOT!

caroline94535

It's official. I've become a Queen B. Had those comments, coughs, and theatrics been directed at me I would try to maintain some dignity at the time (which you more than accomplished), but the next day I would just love to get on the bus, soaked in perfume, scented lotion, body spray, scented hair spray, everything "sweet smelling" I could layer on my body...and then would have sat as close as possible to them.

***************

If it wouldn't send me to the hospital, I'd do the same.

Let's see, a combination of Poison and CK 1 liberally doused on my body and clothing, a mouth full of Jolly Ranchers and an entire can of Aqua Net sprayed into my hair!

I wouldn't have said anything because the look on my face would have spoken volumes. I'm another who is extremely sensitive to perfume scents, cologne or cigarette smoke. Even though their behavior was obnoxious, it's behooving to me as to why some feel the need to completely bath in the stuff and I privately wish they wouldn't. I get severe migraines when I'm exposed to it for too long, they last days and I end up having to work with them, which is not easy.

Your right to ball up your hand into fist ...

.. and throw it around ...

... stops an inch before the end of my nose.

o j

I would have said "I don't wear perfume, but honestly I would appreciate if you did."

I would have told her that you thought the stench was coming from her direction.

Honestly, it seems like people are so intolerant these days. We live in a society where we are exposed to many different things that may bother us. In a room full of a hundred people, I doubt there would be more than one that would actually get sick from some sort of scent. It may bother you, yes. Maybe eyes will water and your throat burn for a moment. That 1 in a 100 needs to protect themselves and not expect it from the rest of the world.

Cigarette smoke doesn't bother me but stale smoke does. But I would never be so rude as to let someone know that I think they stink.

How about, I wear so much perfume to cover up the stench from someone elses diarrhea of the mouth

Maybe they were being kind and hinting you should try perfume?? LOL

IDK, in this day of political correctness and people being "offended" by something as simple as a word or the like, why shouldn't my (and many others) dislike of stench be respected in any sort of way that is out and out demanded by so many of their desires? Why should we have to protect ourselves from their intrusions? People who need to marinate in perfumes, colognes, scented soaps, scented candles, scented shampoos, scented deodorants, scented detergents, scented fabric softeners, scented mouthwashes, scented toothpastes (when they use them), scented foot sprays, scented makeup, and so on... those people have a real problem. What kind of sickness makes people do that? And forcing their problem onto everyone else is... offensive.

Whatever cynic. It's not what they said. As offensive (to use your word) as they are, UNDOUBTEDLY, they would've said something overt, not hinted.

It couldn't possibly have been them, it has to be me? Even though they complain that P is putting her bike on the front of the bus (which there is rack for and she does everyday), or that man who chews tobacco is on the bus, not that he's chewing or smells like cigarettes, he is just ON the bus, or... one time, someone stumbled and they ran into the more unhappy of the two and to this day she complains every day, I'm not exaggerating, that the woman "tore" her shirt off. Every day we need to hear about it? They're unhappy. All day every day. I'm sorely tempted to record them and have you hear it.

I cannot tell you how light the mood on the bus was yesterday with everyone smiling and chit-chatting. Oh, to be like that every day.

"in this day of political correctness and people being "offended" by
something as simple as a word or the like, why shouldn't my (and many
others) dislike of stench be respected in any sort of way that is out
and out demanded by so many of their desires? "

are you saying that in the pre PC days it was ok to tell someone they stink? I don't think it was ever considered appropriate to do that so not sure what political correctness has to do with it?

I think your use of the word "stench" is a bit over the top. when I was a kid and my father opened up the septic tank, that was a stench, it hardly compares to the smell of someone wearing too much perfume or hair spray

They just sound like troublemakers. Since this is a shuttle bus operated by the business that you work for, could you lodge a complaint with HR? Maybe if the others that have also been victims could also do that? Squeaky wheels could have a more pleasant ride to start their day. Their behavior is akin to workplace harassment.

I appreciate the thought, but it's a city bus and I don't want to escalate it... yet.

I would have simply said I don't wear perfume.

I am really tired of the scent pollution around also. I was in a long line a few months back in a store. A pair of women were in front of me with some jarred stink bombs (candles). They kept unscrewing the lids and waving them around at everyone commenting on how nice they smelled. I held it in as long as possible but I finally just told them to wait 'til they were out of my space because they were giving me a migraine. At that point, of course I got the looks like I was the bad guy. LOL I only blame myself for not speaking out from the start. Next time I won't wait to speak up.

As far as church goes, why does someone have to be perfumed up in a house of worship? It's not a nightclub.

Wow, I thought this had run its course.

Well you would've been rude if you'd said it to me. If you noticed mel, I said I asked others (including a coworker who gets migraines from scents, so much so, if one of her officemates uses lotion that offends the other, they wash it off and air out their office) and they said they didn't smell anything. So the offensive ladies' venom was misdirected towards me.

When you don't wait next time, just ask POLITELY. No need to hold anything in. If you wait and it erupts, it likely won't come across in a way that helps people understand how many of us (including me!) are allergic and/or get migraines. You could help the situation for others on down the line, rather than only worrying about you? Just a suggestion!

That is a great suggestion. No need to get snarky with the perceived "offender". Merely politely ask, if possible, for the offending smell (candle or otherwise) to be "recorked". Lots of people don't know that strong smells can cause migraines. I never knew this until my niece enlightened me that it happens to her. I would say that a lot less women wear perfume these days than before. It must be torture to be in close proximity to something that physically hurts you and not to be able to do anything about it. It's all in how you deliver the message.

Last night we went to our favorite bar/pub at the beach that has great food and a great view. Just as we were starting to eat, a group of 4 arrived and sat at an adjacent table. One of the four was a fifty-ish woman who absolutely REEKED of an unpleasant perfume. A stifling smell, I took a bite of food and couldn't taste it.

My wife said "What should we do?" I looked around saw an unoccupied table 20 feet away, and said "Grab your place-settings and food, we'll move over there." She said "You first." And so I did.

Our waitress was setting up a nearby table, and after we'd reseated ourselves, she came over and asked "Is everything okay?" I said - "Did you get a whiff of that woman's perfume, we couldn't breathe over there." She said, "I caught it when they walked in. It's awful, I don't blame you a bit." And we both laughed.

at least you didn't make a scene!

That's not my style at all. I never suffer in silence and have no problem speaking up politely when necessary in any situation but in this case, it wasn't necessary.