Do You Have More Than One?
10 years ago
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- 10 years agolast modified: 10 years ago
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Do you like one more than the other?
Comments (6)Younger kids are easier to buy more for... there is so much cute/fun stuff to choose from that they'll like and as kids get older, they may have particular interests and it' gets harder to know what they'll like or think is silly. But, the issue isn't really about the gifts, right? (Gifts are given from the heart & should not be forced.) I decided this year, to buy SD separate gifts than what DH gets her. I bought a few nice things but nothing fancy or off her "list" which consisted of iPod, laptop, PS3, & lots of other expensive, unrealistic items. Then DH went shopping on his own. He spent more $$ than me, but he got her... well, I thought it was boring, lame things like a comforter & backpack. (just plain ones too!) and I pictured SD opening them & then the tears... nothing from her list. I know she will not tell DH anything about the stuff he got her, she cares about his feelings. So, I went & got a few more things & added them to the "from Santa" pile so she won't know they are from me. I don't plan on being around when she opens them. (she comes back on Sunday night) My presence would probably make it less comfortable for her so I'd rather her share the moment with her dad, unless she asks for me. As for her noticing favoritism & it affecting how she feels about you. That could be happening. But, sometimes there are differences in how stepchildren relate to the stepparent based on gender. Son's usually 'like' and are nicer to a stepmom than a daughter. That could be because two females are 'competing' for dad's attention/affection. A stepmom might be seen as a rival to the daughter but the son may see the qualities in the stepmom, that attracted the dad to her. Likewise, son's may feel more rivalry with a stepdad... it's seen more when they are 'competing' to be man of the house. Daughters may see the qualities in the stepdad that mom finds attractive. There could be many factors in why people like or don't like someone, and in step situations it's more complex because there are the stereotypes, different perceptions, assumptions, etc. It's made worse when kids experience mom & dad splitting to two houses... but when they hate each other, find someone new & want the kids to be as excited as they are, etc. Imagine how a child feels hearing mom say she's found her soulmate in the new BF.... what about my dad? or vice versa. Oh yeah, I have three kids. I love them all. I'd jump in front of a bus for any of them but they all have different personalities & traits. They all get on my nerves at different times... occasionally all at the same time. I do more for one or another when I feel they need more & trying to be fair or equal doesn't work. I don't consider how many gifts or the price of the gifts when shopping for them. I try to get them what I think they want, need & will appreciate. This year, I bought my middle son many things (he has moved out & is his first apartment, struggling financially), my daughter got less but everything she asked for (she still lives at home), and I have not yet bought my oldest son anything... I may give him cash because he has to fly back to his base & it would be very expensive to ship anything back east. He needs furniture for his new apartment so cash will suffice. I bought his son (DGS) about half of what SD got, mostly because he doesn't really need anything & he's running out of room for toys & clothes. He's 21 mos... he won't really care....See MoreDo you have more than one true 'love'?
Comments (18)Thanks everyone for your feedback and great advice! I am doing some of that already (shopping for both, scrapbooking/Pinterest/Houzz)so I guess I am on the right track. I will have stainless apppliance so that is a touch of gray. Unfortunately I don't have room for an island or a hutch. What I do know is that I am not a huge granite fan so that narrows things down a little. LOVE marble, but probably will go with a quartz. So this my thought process and the options I am considering: 1) Gray, maybe more like taupe or greige, cabs; white quartz counter - Misty Cararra, Torquay, Lagoon, Lyra; and a white or light bs. For example ... (I blame Michelle16 for this one! :)) or ... with ... 2) White cabs; gray counter - Caesartone Pebble; and ??? for bs (The gray and white lends itself nicely to pale blue - paint, bs, etc. While I like blues in my bedroom, I don't know that I want it in my kitchen, so I would need some other bs ideas) 3) White cabs; brown counter - Caesarstone Wild Rice; and ??? for bs (maybe this?) Not sure why those last few pics came out so small. Maybe a subliminal message that gray is the way to go :)...See MoreDo you ever read more than one book at a time?
Comments (30)carolyn, I liked your word, "tidy-minded". It doesn't really apply to me as far as my reading, but I liked the word. Read more than one? Always. Always an upstairs book, at least one downstairs book. At least two in the car, one in my purse, one paperback mystery shoved under the seat of DH's SUV (just in case... shhhh... he doesn't know it's there.) and quite often, an audio tape in my car as well... the current audio tape is a Hamish McBeth mystery, Death of a Perfect Wife. And I usually have one textbook-type non-fiction book that I read in bits and pieces, too. Right now, that book is William J. Bennett's AMERICA: The Last Best Hope, volume 1. I cannot seem to hold myself to just one book. We are going on vacation in a month or two and with the new weight restrictions on luggage, I am seriously considering paring down the clothes so I can take the same number of books. PAM...See MoreWhich hosta do you have more than one of?
Comments (30)The only hosta I intentionally have more than one of is So Sweet. Others I have duplicates of: Irish Luck, because I thought the other one was dead Bridegroom, same reason. Dancing Queen, same reason. "Big Blue" because I divided it. Blue Mouse Ears because Cleo (my dog) mauled it and Blue Cadet and I couldn't determine which pieces where which hosta when I repotted them. All of the above will go in one pot when I repot this spring. Night before Christmas because my neighbor gave me hers when she moved to assisted living. I'll keep both. I'm thinking of splitting my oldest So Sweet and will keep all three. It's in about the biggest pot I can handle and it aesthetically looks like it's too big for the pot. It does not have that nice round shape anymore. It did well, though. I bought another Minuteman because it was so gorgeous I couldn't resist. I had a smaller one and a Patriot. Not sure whether I will keep all three or not. I'll wait and see how they do. I still have two Frances Williams I intended to re-home. I think I will try them one more season and see if an acidic fertilizer will help their looks. bk...See More- 10 years ago
- 10 years agolast modified: 10 years agoMarilyn Sue thanked rhizo_1 (North AL) zone 7
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