What I don't understand is receiving something other than than what you ordered and paid for, then keeping it. Sounds like false advertisement, an awful misunderstanding, or you didn't receive what you paid for. Maybe I missed something in there but wanted to point out the possibility you may still have recourse. I don't see having to fight the soil for the rest of forever. Incorporating organic matter is something you will have to do anyway, but how much amending will this soil need? If you can achieve the ideal concert of clay, sand, and silt, then why not do it now? Just till in what isn't already there. I think this is one instance I would recommend tilling because the soil is new as it is. Additionally, you get to kill two birds with one stone by turning over the crappy lawn rather than having to kill it off with chemicals. The answer to your question is yes.

melsouth and mdlm, I can't tell you how many times during these last few weeks that I've been stopped in my tracks by the thought of the whole house burning to the ground and losing much more than we did. My heart goes out to you. There really isn't anything to do but carry on, is there? melsouth, I know exactly what you mean about the PTSD. I've found it hard to remember people's names and feel like I'm walking in a fog. Before this, I felt pretty invincible. Now every time we leave the house, I feel like something is going to happen - car accident, whatever. Just don't feel safe. I really hope your insurance made good for you and things are going as well as they can. I will take the advice to be judicious in our decisions and get professional help. I tend to take the safe route and not make major leaps, so chances are that things will remain pretty much the same. Maintaining the character of the home is extremely important to us and it sounds like the insurance company is planning on factoring that into the cost of the restoration. I am seriously considering expanding that bathroom into our guest room. It wouldn't be a huge change to floor plans or anything and the plumbing already runs through that room. We rarely use the room (it just had a twin bed) and have a large finished basement with a powder room that guests can use in a pinch. Thanks again everyone for your support and suggestions. I really started this thread as a whim, but it has been so helpful to get your thoughts and advice.

Oh I'm so sorry. Finding out the loss is greater than you thought is almost like losing it all over again. (((hugs))) There is something other than all new or a bad replica...it's a good replica. Friend of mine (I should take pics some time) built a new house about 15 years ago, and to walk inside, you'd think it was from the 17th-18th century. He worked with a fellow who salvaged antique wood and he used real beams, flooring, boards, etc. to create an excellent replica. There are also in between steps, like using more modern materials in the same way that they did back then so it gives the same look and coziness and feel, but in a slightly fresher way. I was in another house on a house tour that was a lovely Queen Anne style victorian...just gorgeous. We were stunned when they told us where the addition was. They did such a good job of replicating the style and trim, that it was seamless. So it is possible. Also, keep in mind the benefit of the new is that it won't need the maintenance or have the issues (think electrical, plumbing, rot) as the old has. And the new can provide wonderful features that the old never could like in-floor heating, adequate electrical outlets for today's appliances...

I'm not even sure I'd be comfortable calling myself a small-r rosarian. I've been growing roses for only about 5 years; before that I chose plants that reminded me of roses but weren't as intimidating - begonias, dahlias, etc. Now I'm up to 55 roses; mostly floribundas with a handful of HTs, shrubs and minis thrown in. A couple climbers too but I don't have a lot of room for the really big ones. If I did I'd try Jude the Obscure in a heartbeat! I'm living in Toronto Canada, and my neighourhood is a nice little microclimate that qualifies as USDA zone 5b; at times I can even stretch that to 6. My yard is full of mixed perennial beds and has all types of light areas. I've got almost as many varieties of hostas as roses, and more iris, but only because they don't take up as much space. I also love lilies and peonies, particularly the intersectionals. In my "past life" I was a wildlife biologist and worked at several different zoos in Canada and the US throughout my education/career as a keeper, trainer, wildlife educator, and researcher. I loved that work more than I can say, but ultimately, when the time came, being at home for my kids came first. To my immense pleasure, I found that my appreciation for nature, science and taxonomy, my obsessive devotion to detail and my love of living things of all shapes translated very naturally into gardening. I'm not a member of any rose society yet, but now that you mention it... I'd better look into the local club scene! This is the big version of my current profile icon. It's not a rose shot but it reminds me of a very special time in my life. The shot is about 10 years old, and is me visiting with some young and friendly elephants. I will always feel highly privileged to have had such experiences. Karen