Here's a solution that worked for us. We lengthened the rails so that the longer queen mattress would fit between the head and foot boards. Then we just laid 2 x 4 crosspieces across the top of the rails to hold the mattress. By opting not to mess with the width of the bed, we didn't have to worry about the connecting system. Granted the mattress is a bit wider than the head and foot boards, but it's not really very noticeable. It does raise the height of the mattresses by quite a bit, but I like a high bed, so this wasn't a drawback to me.

Honestly, people were just hardier in days of yore. My very scary, steep, hardwood floor staircase in my 1913 bungalow had no signs of ever having a handrail. I installed one for ME, no kids involved. I had a handyman put up one that looked just like Marie's above. When I moved from that house, I took it off to get my furniture down. Pretty simple actually. To be honest I would not use a velvet or other rope. I need something to really grab onto if I slip on the hardwood floors; not something that could rip or pull away. Oh, I also found that investing in non-slip socks is a must!

Leave it be. Stair work is some of the most expensive zero payback work that you can have done. And what you had was so much better than the overwrought 1997 fakery shown.

OK, you all have convinced me to eliminate the oak look of the risers. While I'm too conservative to paint them, I'm thrilled with the many options for stick on riser decals that can be readily removed, including one with the pattern I've been nuts about for ages! It's called Astra, here. BUT -- back to the newel post/handrail for the upper section of this stairway.....previous comments were that we don't have the open wall for the spindles and we have no place for a newel post. I need to understand if the change I want to make isn't feasible, when it seems to me like it should be...please helps!