advice needed for a special hosta for my mom
rosiewells7b
8 years ago
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mom in a wreck, need advice
Comments (23)Gary, I'm glad I don't have to live where you do. Even growing up in Joisey, I never encountered such cynicism. What's it like not to trust people? What's it like having to worry about being "taken advantage" of all the time? Gee, we see our neighbors walking down the road and they end up on the porch talking for an hour. Last winter I was in the general store and these young snow bunnies came in looking for directions to the interstate. This old grizzled Vermonter said "Going to New York?" "Yeah, we want to get back to civilization." "Ah, yes New York City. A place where you must lock your doors with 3 locks. A place where you have a beautiful park and are afraid to go into it at night, A place where you can be shot or stabbed for your nice coat or new sneakers. A place where can get your car radio stolen just because someone else wants it." "And you call THAT 'civilized!'" Another incident happened a short time ago. A kid was working at a local gas station and decided to just quit. He locked the door and left. When the owner found out, he realized the pumps were left on. But when he got to the station he opened the door and found money inside. People slipped their money under the door when they got gasoline. He read the pumps and counted the money. "I owe somebody change!" Would people do that where you live or would they "take advantage" of the situation? I do craft shows for a living. There was a teeneager in the booth next to me last week helping her parents. She saw a $20 bill on the ground in front of the both and picked it up. A short time later two teenage girls were looking for something near the booth. The young lady asked what they was looking for. "I lost 20 dollars". That young lady gave her the bill she found. She could have "taken advantage" and kept the money, but she did the right thing. And that's the difference between where you and I live....See MoreNeed advice for special needs teen...
Comments (17)Sweeby, I know this is so hard for you AND for your son. As a special ed teacher, I can throw out a couple ideas that have worked for me with some of my kiddoes. I have had everything from ID (the old MR), LD, ED, PDD, autism... One thing I would ask him if he says that he is not intelligent is what he thinks that means. Introduce him to Howard Gardner's "Seven Intelligences" and he will be able to see which kind of intelligence he has. He needs to know that just because he is not strong on linguistic intelligence or whatever, he may be "people smart" or "art smart" or "music smart" as we explain it to our elementary school kids. There are so many careers that he should be able to find something he loves. His teacher/case manager should already be focusing on vocational goals for/with him Next, I am assuming that he has an IEP, so I would be sure it is addressing not only his academic needs, but also his social, emotional, and transition to work needs. If you don't feel it is doing that, request a meeting. An IEP is a document that can be rewritten at any time if changes are needed. Once a student hits 14, transition planning is a required element of the IEP process. Special education operates under Federal mandates and those are very clear. Some districts do a great job, some...well, not even acceptable. He should be allowed accommodations such as extended time on tests. Our state tests are untimed, but for timed tests, most of my students get extra time-at least time and a half and sometimes more. Check with your state DOE to make sure the school is just not wanting to take the easy way out here. I am not saying they would, but it takes a lot more scheduling time to administer tests to our sped kiddoes since you need extra teachers to administer the tests when not everyone is receiving the same accommodations. For instance, if some get extra time and read-aloud, they need to be in a separate group from those who get only extended time. It is a nightmare for the test coordinator, but it is necessary to ensure that my students receive what has been agreed to on the IEP. Also, the school psychologist and/or counselor may run something like friendship groups during lunch or at other times that can offer specific, direct instruction in a social setting for kids who need help navigating the world of human interactions. Don't be afraid to push back if your son isn't getting what you believe he needs. Every district should have a monitoring and compliance division for parents and students whose concerns are not addressed at the school level. Knowing that he may have to work longer and harder than some others is a good lesson, but it can also be extremely frustrating and discouraging if he realizes his entire life may be one of always having to work longer and harder and never achieving as much. He needs to find his passion and then everyone can work together to see that he can incorporate that into his future in some way....See MoreAdvice needed for mother of special needs children
Comments (8)MEMA, I really feel for you. For a while we thought my oldest had Asperger's but he never received that "diagnosis" - it turns out he has sensory integration disorder. He's getting OT for it. Here is what I've found. He just finished 1st grade. When he was in kindergarten, his teacher kept telling me he had adhd - but I knew she was wrong. I think teachers tend to call all kids adhd who aren't 100% average! Anyway, once found out just what he has, I talked to the school district (we live in a very large city school district). They couldn't offer him any help because his grades were at least average and his behavior didn't distrupt class. We've been taking him to a hospital Occupational Therapist once a week for therapy and doing daily therapy at home and it's made THE WORLD of difference. In only 7 months, his reading level has jumped from kindergarden level to 3rd grade level & he's only 7. We took him to private speech therapy, too, but once he started OT we could only afford one, so we insisted the school provide speech therapy, which they agreed to do. He also qualified for one-to-one reading tutoring at school for the first 1/2 of first grade because he started with such a low reading level. It didn't help much until he started OT. Now, here are my conclusions. DON'T EXPECT MUCH FROM THE SCHOOL. The schools are set up to deal with the 90% of kids without any special needs. If you know what you child needs, be prepared to make sure they get it yourself. That might mean taking them to private therpists, paying for it yourself, or doing it yourself. Don't sit back and expect the school to provide what your child needs. And, what they do provide, remember "you get what you pay for" The difference between private speech therapy and what he gets at school is night and day. When we were paying $40 for 1/2 hr, he got one-on-one, intense therapy that did him a lot of good. At school, he gets 20 minutes of speech therapy with a group of 4 kids and one therapist once a week, and that's considered GREAT - most kids only get it once a week! It hasn't helped at all, but it is keeping him from loosing the gains he got from the year of private therapy, and at this time he's getting a lot more out of the OT, so that's where our limited $$ has to go. Luckily, he is in a "normal" classroom so I haven't had to deal with special education - I'm sure that would be a mess, too. You hear constantly that you must be your child's advocate. When your child has special needs, it's almost your full time job to be his or her advocate. Also, make sure the Aspergers diagnosis is the correct one. Sensory Integration Disorder has a lot of the same manifestations - have you read "The Out Of Sync Child" - it's like the "bible" for SID. Even with the "battles" I feel that school is the best place for my son. I know I could not provide what he needs at home, and I feel it's important that kids have "cultural litteracy" that school provides. It gives us all one common experience. Good luck to you - you've got a tough row to hoe! It sounds like you are up to the battle, and I'll keep you in my prayers....See MoreHaving problems with a few of my hostas need advice thanks
Comments (8)Kate, I don't think he/she meant the puckering... Although the second hosta looks better than the first, towards the bottom of the pic (lower right corner) you can see the round burn-looking marks on it, which are similar to what's on the first hosta. I'm also not sure if the light-colored veins are normal for the second hosta variety, but hopefully others will chime in. The first hosta has a ton more of the round burn-like marks, plus it also has some kind of bigger areas that look like fungus to me, but that's just a guess. Would love to know what the experts think of both of these "blemishes." (The smaller, round things look similar to what my Blue Ivory gets a lot of and I don't know if it's normal for that hosta or not.) If the bigger damage on the first hosta in this post isn't insect-related, then my best guess would be a fungus. If no one else knows what this is, then I'd suggest trying to treat first with a pesticide and then a fungicide. I'm wondering if all that gravel around the crown and leaves is causing any issues, but am assuming that all your hostas are grown in the same/similar conditions....See More
rosiewells7b
8 years agorosiewells7b
8 years ago
josephines167 z5 ON Canada
8 years agorosiewells7b
8 years agolast modified: 8 years ago
mbug_gw
8 years agojosephines167 z5 ON Canada
8 years agolast modified: 8 years agoMy pleasure! I Really enjoyed reading about your introduction to hostas and your husband helping in the garden! The couple that gardens together.....well, you know the rest of the saying. :)
Belated Congratulations on your recent wedding! I love your idea of plant gifts! Watching trees/shrubs or perennials grow that both of you planted is very rewarding. If you browse through the Hosta Library you will find countless names that might be fitting of wedding anniversaries, etc.
Speaking of lilacs...I bought an unnamed shrub a couple of years ago (3-4) that ended up being a Dwarf Korean Lilac. Having a small property, it is just the right size without having to trim it...and it doesn't send suckers out like a lot of lilac shrubs and trees do. This year it is absolutely loaded with flower buds. It is a light and airy shrub...that has lost two substantial limbs to snow load last year. Unless you've already decided which type you want to get, I am "soliciting" this one! I'm sure there are better and larger varieties out there, but I didn't think I'd like this one as much as I do. FWIW ( can't wait for the flowers to open. They are a pale lilac colour similar to a Daphne shrub's flowers. )
Don't forget to post pics of your garden, as often as the feeling moves you.! We just love enabling new Hosta lovers! :-)
josephines167 z5 ON Canada
8 years agorosiewells7b
8 years agoSo I just realized that the website I'm going to order the hostas from doesn't have June listed for sale. Huge bummer. :(. I've read about HVX and am really not wanting to get it at local stores. I'll have to figure out what he has that y'all have suggested.
Jo,
I saw an ad for a new variety of pink lilac that looked really pretty. Might research that one and see if that would be a good gift next year for her. Until I get a larger yard my mom kindly lets me enable her into planting things I don't have room for. And thanks so much for the welcome!!!!
P.S. Sorry it posted sideways. No idea why it did that. :/
rosiewells7b
8 years ago
Here is a bad picture of the garden. It is all freshly planted so nothing is a standout yet. All of that used to be a huge juniper bush my husband ripped out. It actually broke his maddock that was brand new. And on the right side were three nasty shrubs that had really sharp leaves. Our HOA kindly (not) planted them without asking us. So! I dug them up haha.
They all went in the trash.
Also, the bare patch of hill in the background is my next area to tackle. It's a tough spot because it's packed soil and regularly gets trampled on by the yard guys. I'm trying to figure out what to plant there as it is mostly in the shade and would need a plant that is drought tolerant. I was thinking maybe sweet woodruff?dhaven
8 years ago
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