We had an extremely large golden retriever "Bubba" that patrolled until about 10PM and then came in the house. By 10:15PM we would have deer triggering motion detector lights in the yard. The more deer you have, and the dryer that their regular food gets, the problems with them will escalate. Especially if you are watering any of your trees. Your trees will be the lushest growth in the area. I had to finally get a fence put up. Even then, I can see where deer have pressed their faces into the fence to try and push their way through it. I need to do some kind of fence repair almost monthly. My problem is that I collect rain water off of my pole barn for my blueberries and some other fruit. The barn is close to my fenced in area. Deer can smell the water in the rain barrels from quite a distance. Even though I keep the barrels covered, the smell still attracts them to the area when it starts to get really dry out. Don't hold any standing water unless you really have to.

You asked for advice, so I am going to tell you that your responses to your neighbor have been aggressive and provocative. Your reactions to the neighbor have added to the conflict. Your goal should instead be to give neutral or calming responses. Snookums2 gave you examples of these. Nan-E-Fan gave you away of thinking of the situation that protects you from thinking that by changing your responses to this family you are "wimping out" or acting like you are weak. By keeping calm and responding to exactly what is said, you keep control of the situation. The woman says, "my husband says he saw you letting your dog pee on our lawn." You say, "I don't let my dog pee on the individual lawns, he only goes on the common area." If the neighbor does not know where the common area is, this gives them the opportunity to ask, "where is this common area?" If the neighbor, instead, insists that you do let your dog pee on her lawn, you ask her to take a picture of it. If she says that she has no camera, remind them of their cell phones or tell her to get a cheep disposable. Or offer to pay half for a disposable. This shows that you are concerned for their issue (you don't really have to be concerned, but acting like you are keeps the peace). By remaining calm, you keep the power in the relationship. If they start getting accusatory toward you, or start complaining to the townhouse management, you can calmly say, "I told them that I only use the common area and asked them to photograph the dog using their lawn as a toilet. I even offered to share the cost of a disposable camera. They never did anything to prove it was my dog, they just continue to harass me every time they see me outside." Or if you can remain calm when they harass you, then YOU can go to management and complain about their treatment of you. It takes practice to remain calm and to learn to respond only to the words people are saying to you. What you have been doing is responding to the emotion behind what the neighbor is saying and making assumptions about what she is staying. Your assumption has been, "This family has something against me and my family." By having this assumption in the background, based on your first few interactions with this family, you have been working from an assumption that you are at war because this other family has decided you are. Nothing could go right after this assumption was made. That is why I suggest that you concentrate only on the words that are said. It keeps you focused on your goal of remaining calm and responding to the situation and the concerns that the person is bringing up. It is too late for you to make this relationship start out right, but you can work on calming it down. That will give you practice for future relationships with other people. I had to do this when I found myself getting all upset talking with insurance companies and the like on the phone. After one set of phone calls when I got mad and frustrated and yelled at the person on the other end of the phone, my eyesight went all wonky. It was like looking through a kaleidoscope that was turning. I thought I was going blind! Through the little bits of clearness, I waited through my dial-up internet and slow page loads and figured out that I was having an ocular migraine. I did not need to go to the ER, but I should see an ophthalmologist soon. So I called my eye doc and they got me in the next day. What is one cause of an ocular migraine? Stress. What else does stress do? Cause high blood pressure and other heart disease, contribute toward diabetes and other diseases. Gotta lower stress!

Lukkirish, I choose not to abuse my dogs with shock collars and other painful devices and methods. Not sure what your vet's opinion has to do with this as vets are not behaviorists. Educate yourself on the subject. I have. Gee Cynthia, I was trying to be nice with my replies but since you prefer to get nasty, I'm happy to be equally as blunt. If you can't understand why a Vet would have an opinion about how a puppy or dog is cared for, you are more clueless than I originally thought. :c) I know several Vets and they aren't in the business they're in for the money. While making a decent living is always part of the equation, most Vets become Vets because of their love of animals. Most are involved with them some how outside of work too. It's also really obvious that you have very little knowledge about this topic as well. More specifically, you have no idea what the credentials of my Vet are nor the relationship I have with her so who are you to comment on it? FWIW, she owns several dogs and IS very involved with training and local rescue chapters; more than most. I appreciate that she is engaged with her patients and their families. Her advise on general care and behavior training for our puppy has been invaluable. We followed her advise and now have a super happy, well adjusted, fully trained and non destructive dog. Hmmm...it would seem that maybe you don't have a Vet who is involved in the WHOLE care and life quality of your dog. Is that why your expectations of a Vets knowledge outside of the clinic is so low? We are not abusers and go to great lengths (and expense) to ensure our girl is properly cared for. I take issue that you would imply otherwise. NEWS ALERT! Shock collars are not used with invisible fences. A collar that CAN shock is. There is a difference! Of course you're entitled to your opinion, it's just not an educated one. LOL

If you want to see a guilty dog watch the videos of Denver the guilty dog. Omg they are so funny. He got famous for his YouTube videos and has been on some TV shows. There's no doubt they know, they have long term memory, and they know their name or the sound associated with it. My little one is very good but if there is a kleenex within reach and we are not in sight then it must be shredded immediately because kleenex are the debbil! They must be destroyed! She usually eats tiny bits too to decorate her poo. Lol We know what she has done because she always does it under the little table beside my husband's chair and that's where she goes to hide too. I have never raised a hand to my animals so I don't know what they are afraid of but it's very funny to see it. My Great Danes were terrified of the flyswatter, they of course never had one used on them, but they saw what happened to those bad bad wasps! I swear I knew immediately if there was a wasp in the house, the Danes would all go stampeding into the bedroom and hide. Sure enough I would see the wasp and out comes the dreaded flyswatter! Here is a link that might be useful: Denver the guilty dog