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Gardening in Oz

Memorial Garden ideas

21 years ago

I would like some suggestions from you clever bunch of gardeners for a small memorial garden.

I was thinking perhaps 3m square. I see roses, lavender, something nice smelling, but sounds a bit boring. Perhaps a sundial. Something sybolic would be lovely.

This is for a young girl who was cruelly taken this week, and I was thinking it would be nice to do something of beauty to remember her by. This would be on the school grounds.

It could be something the students could help with.

Any ideas greatly appreciated.

Popi

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Comments (7)

Sparaxis
21 years ago
Think tough plants, that won't need watering, and think something that will bloom for much of the year. Some of the Alistair Clark roses - Suiter is one I have seen growing out of an old tree stump - never watered - always in bloom.
Lavanders are easy care but need clipping - I think French lavander blooms the longest. Daylilies are easy going, and repeat bloom for some time.
It might pay to take note of the girls personal interests when choosing a feature. I can't make any suggestions, but her school friends most likely can and should be involved in the process of choosing. Perhaps something they could sculpt of they are older students?
User
21 years ago
What about a plant that has her name or close to it.

It would be nice to get ideas from the students who knew her well.

Perhaps her favourite colour could feature, or something else she loved.

Clay pavers with inscriptions baked in, done by her closest friends.

It's a lovely idea of yours.

Cheers,
Dee.
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KLC, my condolences on the loss of your young niece. You'll undoubtedly get a wealth of good advice here, but I'll give you what I can from my own experience ... and my heart. Sometimes you just have to "follow your gut". That's what I did when I built a pond with a portion of a small life insurance benefit when my dad died. Unlike your project, it wasn't intended to be a memorial, but that's just what it turned out to be - not only to my dad, but to my mom as well, as it's surrounded by naturalized gardens that she would have loved as much as he'd love the koi and the engineering of it all. It's the most peaceful and restorative place in our yard. Your general plan sounds lovely (I do like the water feature idea), but I couldn't tell you specifically what to put there, any more than anyone else could have told me what to do with my pond area. Of course you'll have to choose plants appropriate for your site; beyond that, I'd let her spirit, and your own, be your guide. It may take a little time to evolve (mine did), but when finished (if a garden is ever finished) it will be a reflection of what she brought into your life. Take your time with it - I really believe it's the process (which should be enjoyed), rather than the end, that has the strongest healing power.
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Allan, So sorry about your loss, but I think your idea for a memorial garden is excellent. Keep the idea of a designer in the back of your mind for now, and do some research on ornamental grasses and bed design/layout first. Go to the library, or a bookstore, and find a couple of good books on grasses. The Color Encyclopedia of Ornamental Grasses, Rick Darke, Timber Press, ISBN 0881924644 The Encyclopedia of Ornamental Grasses, John Greenlee, Rodale, ISBN 0875961002 Read them and look at the photos of grasses and beds. You'll have a better idea of what they can do for you, and how they go together with each other and other garden plants. Use Google and the web for more ideas. Many plant catalog companies include professionally designed beds and groupings that include grasses. One that I like particularly is High Country Gardens, linked below. They specialize in xeriscape gardening, and it's not limited to high elevation locations. Finally, read back through this forum's threads, and continue to ask us questions. Good luck and Happy Holidays. Donn Here is a link that might be useful: High Country Gardens
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Comments (22)
Klc, my sister, mother and neighbor all have home ponds. My neighbor's is the largest with the largest waterfall. All three built their own (well, we kids built my mom's from a basic pond kit). It helps to know what you are doing and to select plants that filter. I'd take the fall to research the options-- but as tinam noted, a well-planned pond doesn't take a lot of maintenance once everything is in balance. My sister had a party last weekend and her pond was just breathtaking-- the lotus was in bloom .. and water hyacinth (which is an excellent filter for the top of the waterfall) was thick and bright. Definitely a showstopper. They collected their own river rocks for the waterfall so it looked much more natural than the faux stone ones. I would be surprised if you couldn't buy a basic pond and build your own fountain for under $500. All of their ponds have been designed to attract both butterflies and hummingbirds.. just enchanting and such a wonderful tribute to your niece. I don't know where you are located.. but another lovely tree is a weeping dogwood. It is so delicate and pretty-- and it creates one of those magical umbrella spaces that anele mentioned. I would also look into flowers with symbolic meaning. I have seen gardens that "tell a story" through the flowers and they are just lovely and have such sweet meaning that lasts through the years. Here is a link that might be useful: Symbolic meaning of flowers
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Comments (1)
Any flowers the deceased liked? Or flowers of the colour the deceased liked?
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popi_gw
Original Author
21 years ago
Many thanks Sparaxis and Dee, brought tears to my eyes thinking of your lovely ideas.

P
alisonoz_gw
21 years ago
When I saw the post, I had some thoughts like Sparaxis. Perhaps a native garden - plants endemic to the area, one nice hardy shrub, some ground-covers, a plaque, and some ornaments peeking out, maybe a little dry-river bed and a seat for reflection. As with the above posters, the best chosers would be her school-friends. Keep it simple.
User
21 years ago
Hi Popi,
I do hope you let us know what you finally decide on. It would be lovely to know. Good luck with the project.
Cheers,
Dee.
popi_gw
Original Author
21 years ago
I will indeed, let you know Dee.

I think I might wait until after the funeral and then approach the principal, he could act as a sounding board, and maybe a go-between.

I have been doing some reading up on garden design and thinking on how to actually present the proposal.

Its really such an emotional situation.

Sadness all around, lets brighten up the world with beauty and goodwill through gardening. Gardeners of the world unite !!

Popi (I'll get down off my soapbox now.)
pepino
21 years ago
Hi Popi
We had a funeral recently and I noticed the younger generation were fascinated by Kangaroo Paws in some of the arrangements. They are hardy plants and come in a few different colours.

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