I think that my one single post to you hardly qualifies as "bugging you." Also, you already posted this once, and are now posting it twice in a couple of weeks. If you aren't having luck here ( and you posted twice so you obviously aren't) then the plant trading forum seems like it would be the best place to get what you want. Why is pointing out an appropriate forum to you considered "bugging you". I thought it would be useful to you.

Thank you everyone for the excellent feedback. I will spend lots of time studying the UF bug identification pages. And thank you for the encouragement Silvia. I didn't let my initial foray into vegetable gardening daunt me too much. I chalked it up to learning and even got 12 pints of roasted habanero salsa, a few pounds of sun-dried (dehydrator, LOL) tomatoes, a few quarts of pickles and a few pints of hot pickled okra before the whole thing crashed and burned. I read as much as I can as often as I can and try not to bug people with too many questions. I was the person in college and grad school who everyone hated because I was always waving my arm wanting to know how and why. So this morning I had a Hitchcock moment. Every morning I walk through the yard and carefully inspect everything. I noticed lacy leaves all of the way down on the bottom of some tomato plants. I can't bear to throw a seedling away when I thin, so after everything got potted I had about 12 plants left. I stuck them in the new in-ground veggie bed I put along the back of the house. I plucked a leaf off and turned it over. It was CRAWLING with dozens of almost microscopic worms/caterpillars. Like I said, I'm Mrs. Magoo even after implant surgery. I could see they were greenish and had some kind of stripe. They were so small that I didn't think I could squash them with my foot or roll the leaf up and squeeze them. I ran to the bird bath and shoved the leaf under water. Then I went back and carefully combed the bottoms of all of the plants. I found 5 or 6 more leaves like that and drowned them too. Now I'm curious about whether moths lay dozens of tiny eggs at a time or if the eggs hatch multiple caterpillars? It's time for another Bt spray anyway. I try to do it after irrigation nights. Today is dark and overcast and looks like rain so I may have to wait until tomorrow. I figured I'd let the babies drown good and proper and then change the water in the bird bath later. I should have taken a picture but my phone was in the house. I should throw them in a jar with mesh over the top and add a few leaves to see what they turn into after a bit. Snakes, worms and caterpillars gross me out so badly!

ok renaruto this may be a case in which you provided way too much info and details about your ex wife to your new girlfriend and now she is using that against you which imo is immature and only shows how insecure she really is, i only say that because this exact situation has happened to me before only thing different is that my son is 5 yo and is unable to keep a cell phone....women can be very good at hiding their true feelings about certain issues to get you to open up to them and disclose unnecessary information and due to their own insecurities will make you the bad guy when all you were doing from the get go is being totally honest ...i do believe that sometimes theres such a thing as being too honest...did you really have to tell your new gf that your ex wife still wants you?... by saying that you set your self up for constant drama and nagging everytime she contacts you whether it is important or not...any way the answer to your problem lies in your heart i made my decision to make my son a priority and had to break up with my previous gf the good thing was that i am now with a woman who understands and supports my decision to be a good father and doesnt question the communication between me and my sons mother it is truly a beautiful feeling to not feel like you have to choose sides between the ones you love if she really loves and respects you she will trust you and leave it all up to you to set boundaries with your ex wife without having to butt in...hope this advice is not too late

Thanks for posting, I'm in kind of a similar situation where I'm stepdad to a stepson I have a great deal of difficulty with. My wife handles all our finances-- I just hand her over my money. But lately we've been having huge problems over this stepson, and I resent the large amounts of money she spends on him, enabling him, it seems to me (I feel, tho, that if she wants to do that, it's her son, and she's entitled). I'm not even sure if she spends her own inherited money on him, or if it comes out of my money. Over the years, I've made little contribution to my own savings for old age, as I continue to support my wife. So I've been to a trusted therapist who told me that I need to be much more grown up about my own money, and to take control of that money so that everything is transparent, and fairly shared. And "fairly shared" doesn't mean that you have to put up money to support a stepchild you don't like (in my case, this kid has always treated me badly and continues to do so.) I'm seeing that marriage is about equal sharing of money, emotions and needs. And if your husband's needs don't match yours, then there needs to be some very clear discussion around that. I myself am scared of how my wife will react if I tell her that I don't want to have any of my money spent on this kid, and that I want my money to go to charity and not her kid, when I die. Her other son I like very much, and have no problem leaving him anything, or giving him anything. So, for me, it's about honoring myself and my own feelings of resentment, because, as the therapist told me, if you let these feelings go unspoken because you're scared of how the other person will react, the feelings just fester, and will do their damaging work anyhow. So better to be clear and up front about them. I also see that a stepfamily is NOT one big happy family as my wife would like us to be, and I can't go on pretending we're what we're not, and succumbing to what's beginning to feel like emotional blackmail. Hope this helps.