I'd serve the fish with the bun on the side.

Sounds like they want their fish on the plate....and not as a burger. Doesn't seem all that complicated to me. But then again, guess I don't like to 'overthink'.

A piece of fried fish with a toasted bun on the side. Basically desconstructed.

As far as what to serve the person, why not ask?

I'll throw in - I don't think cheese and fish (or seafood) go well together, in any form. Cheese is like ketchup, it has a strong flavor that can overwhelm if what it accompanies has a mild or subtle flavor. Put them together and you'll taste the cheese and not the fish.

Same reason why you drink white wine with fish and not red.

(edited for typo)

This post was edited by snidely on Sun, Nov 16, 14 at 0:25

To each his own snide...

I would think the person wanted fried fish and not a fish sandwich.

I think they wanted a burger, not fish on their bun. I don't like other condiments on my fish unless it is meant for a fish, like tartar sauce. But that is me.
Mary

Different people have a different 'mouth feel', hot fried-in-oil fish can quickly wilt lettuce and other fixings in bun. They may have liked it better if the fish had cooled a couple of minutes before constructing the sandwich. But if they would have been happier with the fish on the plate beside the toasted bun with cheese, I wouldn't have a problem serving that. There's been plenty of times at a BBQ I've taken a ground beef patty or hot dog sans bun if there are side dishes I want to try without filling up on bread....if I fill up heavily in the middle of the day, I may never get moving again that afternoon ;)

My personal tastes dictate no cheese on a fish sandwich - I wouldn't put cheese on a fish dish, wouldn't add it to my sandwich.

I'd ask that person if he/she would like the fish on the side, if this person was a guest at my home. Or, if this is at a restaurant, the customer should request it from the waitress, it's unreasonable to expect the waitress to remember everyone's quirky like/dislike.

If this is at someone's home, I would personally hope that either the menu was made known ahead of time (so I could eat something before coming) or that there was an alternative dish, because I don't eat fish or bread, so I'd be hungry. LOL

snidely, the person whose meal caused confusion was not asked to clarify, because the cook assumed the person didn't want the toasted buns at all, so didn't ask. The receiver didn't think to specify because they assumed the cook would know from the response they made the last time, that they just wanted their fish on the side. Also, I typically agree with you about putting cheese with fish, but this was a breaded deep fried fish (not one of our usually healthy meals) so one might say the crispy coating already made it taste more 'burger-like' and not like a fish entre, anyway.

The debate was one side A (all but one) saying that the vast majority of people would not have understood from the wording of that sentence that the person wanted the same as everyone else, but their fish on the side. Side B (1 person) understood how the awkward phrasing of their sentence could cause confusion, but did not agree that the vast majority of people would assume it meant they didn't want the toasted buns. If such trivial things can be so easily misunderstood, it's a good thing weren't talking about anything serious, lol!

I don't really like fish either. I'll eat it if someone else cooks it for me. I always though fish tacos sounded awful until I had other people tell me they are good. If I'm stuck eating at a fish place, it is something I will order.

I think your friend probably just didn't care for the way the burger combined, He/she possibly loved each item individually. I wouldn't put much worry into it. If they are friends enough to say that to you, then they won't hesitate to tell you what they want if you ask again.

from what you said, I would think they wanted their unsoggy buns on the side. They could make a fish burger their own way.

Was this at a home or restaurant? If a home, I would be taken aback by someone calling my meal "soggy". Hello, tactless much? LOL.

I thought it was pretty clear.....he liked the taste, just not the soggy buns. Next time he wouldn't eat it in the form of a burger....which means no buns or buns on the side.

Because we don't eat bread, when we order a burger we do one of two things: Order the burger as is, and remove the bun at the table. Or: Ask for the burger, no bun. Because so many people claim to have Celiac's (or think they're gluten intolerant), most servers and cooks have no problem knowing what you mean. I find it just easier to order regularly, then remove the bun.

I understood what he meant. :)

I didn't want to bias anyone to leaning toward my 'side' in the debate, so I didn't mention specifics. We were just curious how most people would have interpreted that sentence. But now I'll fess up. The other 3 members of our household were on one side, and it was me on the other.

flamingo, both meals were just at home and in both cases, my DD was the cook. But don't worry, she understood I wasn't implying that she had done anything wrong, as I emphasized that I enjoyed the flavor of everything, but just didn't care for how the hot fish made the buns soggy. So no offense was taken, but our similar meal last night showed that there was confusion about my original comment of "Next time, I won't have my fish in the burger."

DD, SIL and DH all said that the vast majority of people would assume that meant the person did not want the buns at all, because they hadn't said "next time I'll have my fish on the side." I agreed that I had phrased it awkwardly, but did not agree with them that the vast majority would not understand what I meant. I felt it would be more equally interpreted or misinterpreted, as to buns or no buns, lol!

I would have taken the comment to mean no bun. It seems atypical for someone to want to eat a bun with just cheese and the toppings. As long as everything tasted good and no one was offended, sounds like a fine meal. :)

Answers to simple questions shouldn't need to be "interpreted".

I do agree with you, though, with the comment that the cook should have probably doubled checked and asked for clarification before serving the same thing again. Especially after having received something less than a rave review.

Now that we know who was who in this interchange, you might also have taken the opportunity following the first meal to clarify to the cook what preparation you'd like better in the future.

Why was everything in the meal(at your house)so secretive? Can't you just say what you wanted? GAH! What would have been so hard about saying "just fix mine with the fish off the bun and I'll put it together so it won't get soggy". I for one HATE a soggy old bun. If you notice, a lot of restaurants will put the lettuce under the meat of a burger. This helps to stop that soggy bun syndrome.

I'm still not sure I understand what you actually meant. If you said "next time I won't have my fish in the burger", I'd be very confused. The fish WAS the "burger", right? Did you mean you wouldn't have the fish in the BUN? Or did you mean you wouldn't have your fish AS a burger?

"fish in the burger" is the confusing sentence to me, and I believe that I would've asked you, when you said that, what you meant.

I knew what you meant LOLOL! I like to eat my bun and toppings separate from the meat most of the time. But then again, I am odd. ;)

Dances.

I always thought a burger meant a hamburger and therefore was made of ground beef. Fish on a bun is a fish sandwich, in my part of the world. That would confuse me, for sure. As for the sentence in question, I would assume you didn't want your fish in a bun, but on the side. When I get a crab cake sandwich, I always pull it out of the bun. It's too mushy in the bun.

Funny how things can sound perfectly clear to us and leave others scratching their head.

Oops, I guess I'm the tactless one now, sorry! Thanks for clearing it all up!

Honestly I'm still confused...how exactly did you want the food arranged on your plate? Did you want the buns and all the fixings separated from the piece of fish or did you just not want any bun at all and only wanted a piece of fish?

snidely, thanks, but I actually never commented that "the cook should have probably doubled checked and asked for clarification before serving the same thing again." I realized we had both made an assumption. DD's was that my previous response meant I didn't want the toasted cheese buns, and me, that she would know I had essentially meant the same as 'fish on the side.' I'd simply forgotten the expression 'on the side' but won't make that mistake again, lol!

Arkansas, there was nothing 'secretive' about our meal. Your comment "Can't you just say what you wanted? GAH! What would have been so hard about saying..." doesn't really apply. When two people both assume that something was understood correctly, they would have no reason to ask anything, because they didn't have any doubts. That was the case with DD and me, which just goes to prove the old adage about assuming, lol!

You guys obviously have better memories than I because I'm doing good to remember what I said 10 minutes ago and certainly not the exact words that I used. HA!