So Hubby did indeed make it home (though late). We spent a good deal of yesterday cleaning and organizing but we still have a lot to do. With the chaos our life has been for the past several months cleaning (other than the basics) has been a very low priority. CT scan revealed that the mass in her shoulder is non-homogenous, there is definitely infection and the other parts could be abscess, live tumor and/or dead tumor cells. Plan is to do a CT-guided needle biopsy of all the different masses today. She should also get her stomach tube. The battles raging in her body have taken a toll on her in many ways. Probably the most difficult one right now is that she is easily confused and agitated and has no short-term memory. We have to explain to her multiple times where she is and why she's there and what is happening. They put her on oxygen last night (she has developed apnea and shallow breathing due in large part to the meds) and you could see it was really helping her but she kept wanting to take the cannula off. Hubby is at the hospital now hoping to catch up with the oncologist. I suspect he's going to be gone all day. We're still nowhere near ready. Adding to the stress, we came home some time after 11 pm (having spent the evening at the hospital) to discover the newly-vacuumed living room full of garbage and three very dirty and guily chihuahuas. My fault - I had left the (nearly full) garbage can where they could get at it. With a ham bone and other tasties in there it was just too tempting. So we spent our evening scrubbing floors and puppies. At least we hadn't shampooed the carpet yet.

Sounds like good news on all fronts with your parents ! I hope that your brother gets stable quickly and can get back home soon. Taking care of your parents is a lot of emotional and physical work. But it is worth it. I had full care of my 92 yr old Dad in their home for 6 months and then Momma came and lived with us for 3 years. Her health had been neglected while Daddy was in need. We then discovered that she had lymphoma when she came to live in our home. Take care of yourself and I hope that you can all spell each other and stay strong. c

Oh Nancy...my heart aches for your mom & you & yours. It is such a battle but with all of your love, encouragement and attention for her, the Drs' wisdom & meds to ease her pain and your mom's optimism..it's through all of our prayers that she find healing & comfort!

Social work is actually a good piece of advice.... Although they can't give you information protected by Hippa, they can direct you in the legal documents that you and your mother can sign to make it ok for you to get information. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but calling the Hospital Admin- no matter how demanding, angry, persistent, etc that you are- will get you the same result. As a nurse, I can tell you, HIPPA is something that is pounded into our heads on a daily basis. Trust me, sometimes it would be easier to give family the information so they aren't continually calling to harrass us for what we aren't allowed to give. This goes for Hospital Administration, as well. Social work is your best bet. Nurses can't give information that the doctor read and charted because if by some chance we give the information back incorrectly, we open ourselves up for lawsuit and the hospital for a lawsuit. This is also a rule- at least everywhere I have ever worked. Sorry but their are rules that need to be followed. Our society has made it hard because of the fear of lawsuits.