DH gets up earlier than I do, plugs in the coffee and watches the local news. I get up walk through the den and ask what is todays weather forecast. He always says just like yesterdays. (Hello this is south Ga. not Ca.) So we have the same weather year around?? I still ask knowing how he will answer. Isn't it wonderful to be married for 40 something years.

This is not a good day to ask......
he loads the dishwasher haphazardly. But I have decided to be thankful he cleans the kitchen after supper.
He has a bad habit of asking me....."Is there a reason....fill in the blank.
Once it was because the vacuum cleaner was in the living room. I had taken a moment to use the restroom and he thought I was not putting things away.
He did the same when I was making a sandwich, except this time I answered the door. By the time I got back to the kitchen, less than two minutes, he had everything put back, all the time muttering about me never putting things away.
He tells all his friends and his docs I am his medical adviser. But he never listens to what I suggest he do for a medical problem.
He gets upset if I buy a name brand when the store brand is 2 cents cheaper. Never mind I have tried the less expensive product and had to throw it out. But he doesn't mind playing golf, buying hardback books when they are available at the library.
I am sure I drive him crazy, too. Our 49th wedding anniversary is coming up on the 20th....if we make it that long. LOL

You should have been with us at dinner time this evening...
DH, DD, and me. Somehow we were discussing shopping (at Costco) and how I just "disappear" ....says he...."I just turn my back for 30 seconds...and she's gone, never to be seen for the next three trips around the store". DD says"really? She can't move that fast, with or with out the electric cart, can she". "Well, she does". Now mind you, I am not a little person...and often I am using the handicapped cart or hanging on to the big basket to stay on my feet....no foot races for me. I tell him he has tunnel vision...maybe it is baseball vision..keeping his eye on the goal (which is not me). Our jolly conversation continued with the suggestion that we take walkie-talkies and really entertain the customers and employes...."El, earth calling El...where are you" We are a pair. Long time ago, I did hear a comedian tell about the 'hunter/gatherer' thing. Men being goal oriented and women being the gatherers...you know "Oh, I see a tiny berry overthere...let me check it out, or a leaf" while the caveman (hunter) is all about 'I'm go'na get that behemouth out here etc." Life's little comedies ....NANNY

My DH leaves his socks on the fireplace hearth for days at a time. When I asked why, he said they weren't really dirty and will wear them again. What I want to know is why he went out today wearing a fresh pair, but one (not really dirty) pair was still on the hearth!
40 years and counting.
Kathy G in MI

DH is one of the handiest guys I know. He can do anything. We have saved oodles of money because of his skills.

BUT! he walks away from the job before it is finished. I have rooms that have been expertly and carefully painted with precision to detail that have never had the trim work finished going back more than a year. I have cabinetry with that final trim piece missing, perfectly coved floors without a 4"missing piece of corner sclutter trim strip....the list goes on.

He also buys things but never takes them out of the bag. Then he either forgets entirely that he bought them at all or forgets where he put them. (probably amongst the many decomposing bags on the garage floor).

He will carefully unplug and put the coffee pot away each morning, including putting the grounds in the garbage and usually taking the garbage out. But a spill on the counter,the table or drips on the floor he simply doesn't see
. The man does not see dirt,crumbs or spills period. Never ever has he wiped up well after himself. He is simply blind to dirt and clutter.

Which leads us to......apparently a clear service of any kind causes him some anxiety ridden obsessive compulsion to put something on it. Paper work, a tool, a bag of "stuff" anything but never something decorative or useful.

He's a good man and a keeper but there you have it.

I think my biggest gripe is the counters and floor.Everynight before i go to bed and i'm always the last to do so.I go into the kitchen,make sure the counters are clean,the fridge and freezer are tightly closed(another story there)and every thing is put away.

Come morning,i'm the last to get up,go into the kitchen,and find the counter covered with toast crumbs,or cereal or sugar,cupboards standing open(think that's a man thing)and stuff dripped on the floor but not wiped up or swept up.Drives me CRAZY!!!
kathi

When we have someplace to go, Gary never waits for me to be ready. I say something like 'I need to change my clothes before we go' or 'let me run up and start a load of laundry before we leave' or 'just a minute while I go to the bathroom' and ALWAYS when I am ready to leave, I look around and he's nowhere to be found. I'm getting to the point now (after three and a half years together) where I USUALLY remember to look out the window and check to see if he's in the car. That's where he always is. He just does not ever wait for me in the house. It always makes me feel like I'm holding him up. Which I guess I am, but I do wish he'd wait for me when I tell him that I'm almost ready but need to do something first....

Wildchild, I can relate!!!!

This one happened just a few weeks ago. I'm all about energy conservation within the home. And with the rising costs of energy, it's important to be cognizant of it all the time, IMO, but apparently only in my mind.

One evening my DH was in the living room otherwise known as his Man Cave. He was all comfy in there with not one but two lights on along with the TV watching a movie. Around 8:00pm I walked into the kitchen and there I found the overhead ceiling light on along with the lights over the breakfast counter AND the under counter lights. The room was a beaming of fake sunshine! Now, with my conscience mind of turning off lights when leaving a room and only two of us living in the house, I knew I wasn't the culprit. Of course, I could have quietly turned them off as I usually do, but this time, I made it known that HE LEFT ALL THE LIGHTS ON IN A ROOM HE WASN'T USING. He said, "What's the big deal? All you had to do was turn them off instead of making a stink about it". I told him he's wasting electricity which costs money.

After SO MANY times of just turning off the lights without saying a word about it when he left them on, I thought it was time to get my point across, hence why I verbally "made a stink". We lovingly bickered back and forth a bit. After enough of that I left the room and went upstairs to the office. A few minutes later I came back downstairs to go to the family room, otherwise known as the Girl Cave, and had to pass the Man Cave on the way. There was DH on the sofa, no TV on, no lights on....just there in total darkness. I ask why he was in the dark and with no TV on. His reply was that he was saving energy. Smarta$$, I thought. So, there he laid in darkness for the rest of the night, I kid you not. What a baby!!!

Married 28+ years married and we very rarely argue or bicker, but this time I couldn't let it go. He's still a keeper though.

So far I haven't seen a story that would work with my joke, but I'm really glad I posted this thread! These stories are funny all by themselves!

Here's one from our house. Ron has been sick with a terrible head cold the last couple of days. Last night I asked him what he was planning to do today, the point being to see if he felt better. I always ask him what he's doing the next day. He got in a snit and said, "what, you don't want me around? Am I in your way? Fine, whatever" (or something like that). He went back to work today, still in a bit of a snit.

Married 13 years and still loving my sweetheart of a hubby, Ron.

DH's father was easily irritated. This happened one evening when his wife had hired a new girl to serve at a formal dinner.

After the appetizers were cleared the girl came to table carrying a large roast on a platter and looked vacantly around the dining room. "Why are you just standing there," inquired the host from the head of the table. She said she didn't know what to DO with the platter. "Oh, just drop it on the floor, why don't you," he roared. She did.

I was wondering how you were going to integrate our stories into a joke, BigBaby. It's fun to see that "we're not alone". Thanks for sharing your stories, everyone.

Just thought of 2 more with my DH. He does the dishes, since I do the cooking. He always pulls the plug and walks away. When It go to make my tea or something later, there's the sink, greasy, with food leavings in the bottom, etc. No rinsing or wiping of the sink.

He makes Texas chili and made it recently. He follows a recipe to the T, measuring everything. He chopped an onion and asked if I thought it was 2 cups. I said, it's chili! Just dump stuff in. Nope he got the measuring cup out and measured the onions. Then counted in 3 tsp pepper, tbsp oregano, etc, etc.
AND measured 3 tbsp oil to put in the dutch oven. Jeesh.
Dirtying measuring tools when he didn't have to.

WildChild's thoughts really struck a chord with me. Not about my wonderful husband (although he does annoy me), but about my ex-husband.

He considered himself a handyman, but he also never finished a project. And it just used to irk me.

We bought an older house in 1972, a couple of months into my first pregnancy. It needed lots of work, which he was willing to do. While I was in the hospital after just having had the baby, he was at home putting up paneling in the living room as a coming home surprise. He was about 2 feet short on moulding and promised to complete it later.

The living room window was 6" from the ceiling to 6" from the floor and about 4 feet wide and it wasn't one solid window, but a composite of approximately 6" x 8" panes. He replaced it with a sliding window about 3 feet up from the floor. He neglected to finish the sill and the wall - just left it at sheetrock.

He enlarged the kitchen by 100 percent and when it came to the floor he managed to put down particle board. No linoleum. He said that until he got the linoleum put down he would coat the particle board with Varathane to seal it. He told me that I should be careful not to get it wet or greasy until he got it sealed. He did buy the Varathane, but it never made it out of the can. Seriously, in a room with a stove and a sink I'm supposed to never get any water or grease on the floor? I'm embarrassed to tell you that once a week I would use a metal spatula to scrape the grease off the floor in front of the stove.

Fast forward to us moving out of the house after the divorce. We had been married 12 years. My son was now 9 years old and my daughter was 6 years old. I take a look around at the empty rooms and I get tears in my eyes when I see the little tooth marks that my son (as a toddler) made when he stood at the living room window looking outside, his little hands on the wood at the bottom of the window, chewing on the sheetrock. I turn and face the opposite wall and see that empty spot where the moulding was never put up (yes, he bought the extra moulding, but where it is now is anybody's guess).

Then I look into the kitchen. I am NOT going to miss that damN floor!

Don't get me wrong, he isn't a bad man. But boy, that unfinished business really annoyed me.

I'm going through a divorce so needless to say there was an endless stream of things that annoyed me. I'll pick out a few of my favorites.

DH constantly could not find things and, I am not kidding, when I got up and found whatever was missing it was usually just a few inches from where he thought it was. I tried to convince him that anytime he couldn't find something he should look a few feet in every direction from where he thought it should be but that never caught on.

He had OCD and would go around checking all the locks every night. He would unlock and relock the locks. I would lock up, go to bed and shortly after that I'd hear him get up and check all the locks again.

He was really paranoid and if anything went missing, he would act like someone had purposely taken it. Um, we're the only two adults in the house so who was he accusing? I'm not talking about jewelry or money, it was usually something like one old sock.

He used to take my name-brand tampons to soak with deer lure and then he'd replace them with dollar store tampons.

Paula PA ... looks as though he didn't do a very good job of "luring" ... this "dear" (or keeping her, once the lure had worked).

Hi all,

Anyone feel the need of a mediator?

I used to ask Sue whether she'd seen my car keys ... then she had other things to do beside keep track of my car keys ... and I hadn't asked her to keep track of them ... just, had she seen them (lately, that is).

I imagine that she could have told you some of mine, even though we'd been apart for about 35 years: 40 years, as of last Jan., and she's been gone for seven.

ole joyful

Paula - the tampons ROFL!!! (...like the deer are too good for cheap tampons but okay for you.)

Okay a few of mine...

I have enough food in the freezer and pantry to feed us for probably 2 months and yet everytime he is hungry..."there is nothing to eat". (unless Tastykakes count as food)

He never does laundry. I get it washed, dried and folded and back in the basket but I am not the best at getting it put right away. He is notorious for telling me he is out of socks when the basket is 2 feet away from him...neatly folded and obviously clean! (please just TRY to help your self...please.)

He misplaces things all the time. Somehow it is either my fault (???) or he expects me to shine my crystal ball and find it. example:
him: did you see my wallet?
me: no. Where did you leave it?
him: I gave it to you at the store
Me ...and I gave it back to you
him: no you didn't
me: (trying to be calm) ...you put the receipt in it when I gave it to you
him: well where is it then?
me: sigh...did you leave in the car?
him: why would it be in the car?
me: did you look???
I go look....SURPRISE! wallet in console. HERE. TAKE IT.

Does anyone get the feeling that it might be sort of fun to print this thread?

(For your local clergyperson to use in pre-marital counselling, maybe)? Or ... marital counselling, for that matter!

o j

P.S. When did you last discuss some of these issues with friend hubby ... when there wasn't emotional boiling points operational at the time?

(still) o j

I can almost relate to all of the above...except maybe the deer lure episode.

Men. You can't live with them, and you can't leave them on the side of the road.

Well, I actually did leave the dump an ex out on the side of the freeway, but that's a whole 'nuther story. It was so great to see his confused face getting smaller and smaller in the rear view window.

Sadly, I will never hear from him "I'm sorry, I didn't know you felt that way". He is always on the defensive.

I honestly get put out with DH's driving....a lot....:0) We're driving along ad he's craning his neck towards the windshield to see where the hawk flew. Or....he drives on the grooves in the road because he took the corner too wide...or is driving on the center grooved line....it happens a LOT...and startles me. :0) Or.....we run over something in the road and he can't tell me what we just hit.

LOL Nicole.
Oh my foot is through the floorboard. I think DH should slow down sooner than he does when approaching cars stopped at lights. I often tell him to Slow down! (He's not racing, just waits longer than me to brake)

Change the toilet paper roll, I commented on this once and got slammed. I hate finding a half of a sheet and six rolls in the cabinet! Do you not know how the holder works?

I will never forget the EX accusing me of throwing away his paycheck....he asked me repeatedly "are you SURE you didn't throw it away with the junk mail?"
Yep. I threw it away. Didn't need it anyhow.
It ended up being stick to some of that gummy glue on the back of a magazine...

The very top thing that annoyed me about my EX? His addiction to the internet (figure it out). One of the top 3 reasons why we are no longer together. He refused to quit or get help. Not at all funny for a joke, though.

I have the greatest husband (of 32 years) BUT.....everything he reaches into a bag of bread he grabs from the middle! I can understand passing up the crust but every single time it has to be from the middle of the loaf? Drives me nuts and I've told him so several times.

I guess there is a reason they're ex's.

The argument started after 8 straight hours of ESPN....football, basketball, baseball, golf, even tennis. Not bad enough you have to see or listen to some idiot hit the ball, chase the ball, hit it again, chase it again. You have to watch/hear some other idiot hit a tennis ball over the net, then some other idiot hits it back, then.......

I had a breakdown of sports overload and got a little vocal.

It took ex a few seconds to hear me but when he did, with glazed eyes, he picked up the remote, pointed it at me and HIT THE OFF BUTTON. I truly think he thought it would work!

Disclaimer to all who love golf, tennis or any TV sports. I'm down with that.

Quack Attack!!!!!!!!!!!!

The "man cold" is a good topic. No one sicker than a man.

Unfinished projects.

Unable to lift laundry hamper lid.

Overall he's a keeper. I'm not perfect either.

Here's one I heard about.

Women take the shortest route to get to the place they're going. Men on the other hand try to avoid traffic jams, take side streets, they avoid hassle. Men take the scenic route. I've found this to be true as I look around me, DH driving.....on the way to the store and don't recognize anything going past me.

I can only conclude ...

... that I'm making some poor woman's day ...

... day by day ...

... stretching into year by year ...

... by not being attached to her.

o j

I've been thinking about this thread and wondering if there's a difference in 'kinetic perception' in the brains of men and women.

Women are *aware* of the people around them. We notice what others are doing, and we make space for them. I'm thinking of the DH who started to wash dishes while his DW was starting dinner. (Why there WERE dishes in the sink at that time of day, I don't know.) MY DH *needs* to wash his hands IN THE PREP SINK directly across from the refrigerator when I am starting dinner, despite there being a powder room ten paces away.

When our DS was a pre-schooler he would often walk directly into my path. Now DH does the same thing. He'll tell me he wants me to look at something in another room, then walk, *slowly* in front of me! He'll be a gentleman, opening a door for me, but...he's standing between me and the door!

I don't know. Maybe boys just feel more "entitled": Make Way for The King!

Maybe the 'hunter' can't find his socks in the sock drawer because they don't MOVE. The 'gatherer' knows she has to look around, to be observant. (She also knows she put the socks IN there yesterday.)

I had a breakdown of sports overload and got a little vocal.

I don't think I'll ever forget this line. Too funny! It's the first time that I've literally choked on something while reading.

Woody has a really annoying habit of putting things away before either one of us is done with them. I'll pull all the stuff out to make a salad, turn around to start the meat or potatoes or rice cooking, get out the cutting board and ..... where's the lettuce and tomato and stuff gone? Grrrr! He'll say "It was on the corner of the island by the fridge, I though you were done with it?" Um- do you see a salad anywhere? I pulled it out 3 minutes ago, stop putting my stuff away!

He'll be working on a project and go down into his gun room for a drill, a bit and an extension cord. Dogs get excited, is daddy going somewhere? He comes back upstairs. Dogs are excited, Daddy's BACK! Didn't get the right drill bit, go back downstairs. Dogs, worried. Comes back up. Dogs, happy! Drills a hole. Goes back down, puts away drill and bits and extension cord. Dogs, sad. Comes back up. Woof, happy! (I want to kill them.) Hole is too small. (Now I want to kill him.) Back down for all the same stuff. Dogs, yeah, you know. Back up. Yay! Drills a new hole. (I wish it was in my head.) Me- losing it- "check that stupid hole before you put all that crap away again!" He's an engineer by trade and temperament. Makes me crazy.

That's why when he says he has a project, I go shopping or hide upstairs.

Ok, Bigbaby has been disappointed that I haven't contributed to this thread. I've been hanging back, thinking if I voice my opinion on annoying wife habits the largely female population here would be on me like stink on a monkey. But, I'll pull on my asbestos shorts and jump in.

One of her more annoying habits is the huge gap between what she says she'll do and what actually gets done. In our home I wash my clothes and the kids clothes. It's hard to mess up blue jeans and T shirts. Bigbaby washes her clothes seperate because they are "nicer" and so much easier to mess up. Also, when one of her socks goes AWOL we can't be blamed for it. Therefore, when she says she needs to do laundry I figure I'll just hang back and wash clothes the next day or whenever she finishes up. The conversation goes something like this over the next few days:
Thursday: "I need to do laundry today."
Friday: I really need to do laundry today."
Saturday: "I really, REALLY, need to do laundry today."
Sunday: "I'm out of clean underwear."
Monday: The hamper movers from the closet to the washer.
Tuesday: The clothes get washed.

Ron, hunkering down for the firestorm

HAD to share this story....our son recently got married out in the woods of Oregon. We stayed onsite in a cabin and when it was time to pack up and leave, I loaded the entire van with all our luggage, sheets, towels, blankets, etc. My DH was helping our son load things at another part of the camp.
Anyway, I finish packing and go to get the keys and realize that my DH never left them.
I call him on his cell and ask him where the keys are and he tells me that he left them on the bed. I tell him that is not true, because I stripped the beds and there were no keys there. After going back and forth, I decide to take the high road and consider that I might not have seen them on the bed, so I UNload the entire van, empty all the luggage, shake out the sheets and blankets, check the car floors and still....no keys. I call my husband back and tell him we have a problem because I can't find the keys and I ask him to check his pockets. He tells me that he does NOT have the keys.
Now, mind you, I have to walk approximatelty 1/4 mile to where he is (OH, and to add to it, it was pouring rain and all the trails were muddy). When I get there, I explained about unloading everything and asked him what we were going to do. He tells me that he's busy and doesn't have time to think about it. I asked him to double check his pockets and all of a sudden, a look comes over his face and he remembers that he put the keys in his jacket pocket (not his pants pocket)!!!!!
Talk about wanting to rip someones head off.

Oh, Ron, there's no way you could win this one. One of my bugaboos with my dh is that he uses a teaspoon to stir his tea with milk and sugar, then gives it a cursory rinse in cold water and puts in in the dish drainer. I need it to go into the dishwasher because it's not clean, even sticky on the handle that didn't touch the cold water. So I always stick it in the dw behind his back.

Chisue, you hit the nail on the head! In the kitchen my dh will often walk in front of me, slowly, while I'm making dinner. It drives me nuts as we have a very small kitchen. Even after all these years, he has no sense that I'm behind him in a hurry, waiting for him to get outta my way. In his case at least, I think he was raised by a mother who treated her boys differently than her girls--maybe that vague sense of not needing to be aware of someone who may be trying to get around you has held over. But he is awfully good about holding doors for me--gotta give him that.

Message to Ron -- Start checking Bigbaby's supply of panties. Unless there's only one pair left, you're free to use the washer. (That would work here, anyway, IF anybody not named Sue did the wash...lol)

Old Joyful -- Well...WE are rather 'attached' to you!

ROFLMAO!!! I was wondering when Ron would chime in here. I would even have to say I probably and the greater offender here in many ways!!! My problem is I usually have a list a mile long of stuff to do and I don't know where to start! I'll start something, get bored out of my mind, take a "break" from it and do another task. Then I'm distracted and side-tracked and woops, it's time to fix lunch or supper, etc.!! And is time ever a challenge for me!!!

Today I have a half done curtain job in my bedroom waiting to be finished, a partial job with my address book/calendar and I need to clean out a closet before my son gets back here next weekend! Plus, my daily writing of new jokes! So, what am I doing? I'm checking in at the KT, of course!!!!!

Can I write a novel?

Nicole I think I married your DH's twin! My stomach is always in knots and I get exhuasted when my DH drives. He likes to sight see while driving and we end up slamming on the brakes because he's looking elsewhere. I've worn out the carpet on the passenger side from braking lol. Also, he thinks he is taking shorter routes, but in acutality he is not (I've checked).

Parking (a male competitive sport?) is another issue, as he will drive around wasting gas and time in order to get the spot closest to the store. Neither one of us is handicapped and we are only talking two or three parking stalls away from his "Target" spot. Now I just get out of the car and let him circle the lot.

Speaking of driving. Some years back we were driving home from somewhere and I didn't like the way my husband was driving and told him so. Well that just made him madder and he drives worse. We are in our drive and he drives recklessly back down the drive and plows into the stone wall, causing some scrapes on his bumper. He wouldn't have done that he said, if I had not complained about his driving! Somehow it was my fault. It is a wonder he is still with us!

Sue

Mine circles the parking place many times looking for one close to where we're going. EVEN if we're going to the gym to work out. He also backed the Prius into a telephone pole and somehow it was my fault, but I can't remember why. I can think of 1000's of other stories that drive me nuts like having to repeat myself at least three times and him always getting "lost" in stores.

Well, I've been married to my DH for 23 years, and some things I've learned to overlook, but others send me right up the wall.

I cook a meal, and we fix our own plates. I'll get mine ready and take it into the living room, since we generally watch the news while we eat. I'll be in there waiting for at least 10 minutes, if not longer, for him to get his plate ready. He keeps up a steady stream of inane chatter while he's in there "fixing his plate". What he doesn't realize is that I can see his reflection in the china cabinet and see that he is in there eating at least a plate full of food before he comes into the living room with his actual plate. It absolutely drives me crazy.

Another thing he does is hide all the things he doesn't want anyone else to eat in the bottom drawer of the fridge. For instance he'll put a bowl of grapes in there and maybe a chicken breast or nuts or something. I'm the only other person in the house unless DS is home from college, and he's very particular about what he eats because he's always working out and wanting to eat "clean". The point is, he has no reason to hide things from us.

The man clearly has food issues! Lots more too, but I'll leave it at that.

Can relate to many of those.
Driving does get on my nerves. We do a lot of mountain roads when we travel, usualy in a van or
SUV - both rather high vehicles. Comes to a hairpin turn at full speed limit (or more) and goes in on
two wheels around the bend. To a question: did you see little yellow sign saying 15 (or 10 mph) ? standard answer is:
or that's just a suggestion... Groan
The whole male population of this family breaks on the road WHEN the get there, not to
get there. Defense? Look there are 2-3" till the other's car bumper!.. Double groan

To everyone who has trouble with "hunter-gatherer" problems while looking for "____"
When you asked "where?" and I've told you exactly where it is, but it is "not there"???
and you must have me come to look for it (no-o-o... really)
I have a rule: if I come and see "IT" from the spot you were standing on when you said "not there"
I get to whack you with the said item :o)
Say "IT" was a letter - lucky you, might get away with a paper cut. "IT' was a hammer/sack of potatoes -
lucky me, having all the fun.
Cuts on hollering "come look for "IT" dramatically (yes, I know: my husband thinks I'm annoying also)

DS has been known to take YEARS to get around to a repair, and he won't allow you to HIRE anyone to just get it DONE! His MIL had a nice storm door left over from some remodeling. DS removed their old one to install her 'extra'. It was two years later when he finally let his MIL hire someone to hang the extra door. She was tired of looking at it in her garage.

Yesterday DH and I visited DS and family. DS wanted us to see the new deck he built this summer, with help from his next-door neighbor. It is huge, and very nice, but...it still needs a couple of boards on the side rails and it hasn't been stained -- as has been the situation since August. We've had almost two weeks of wonderful dry weather; that can't last. DIL is a some variety of saint!

Most of you seem to have DH's who drive too fast. Mine is overly cautious. I learned to drive along a highway at the speed of the rest of the traffic. He wonders why everybody is in such a hurry. (HONK! HONK!)

The one on my nerves today is the use of the royal "we". Example: 'We' can make this recipe better by adding xyz. Translation: He was too lazy to cook, but now wants to add his spices to change the flavor of the meal that Iworked hard on and am perfectly happy with.

He follows me around like a little goat. I mean literally one or two steps behind me. While I am cooking dinner, going back and forth from the stove to fridge (maybe what, four feet?) he will walk back and forth WITH me, talking all the while. Which of course means I have to walk AROUND him each time, because he is in my way.

If we are shopping, and I take two steps over to get something, he will turn the cart around to follow me. Drives me INSANE. DD is the same way, I can't be more than two or three feet away from her at all times.

He can't find anything either, especially if it is not exactly where he expects it to be. If I put the salt shaker back four inches over from where I got it, then it has disappeared forever as far as he is concerned. Anything on the door of the fridge ceases to exist as well. It's like a rip in the time space continuum or something.

I have said more than once "Are you sure you want me to look for it? Because if I come up there and find it right away, you are in deep trouble!". He usually opts to look around some more (because he knows I will find it right away). But in the end he gives up.

I say he has a "broken looker". DD inherited it from him, and she is a girl so it cannot be attached to the Y chromosome, even though most of us suspect it is, since it is usually men that have the problem ;).

Dances.

You all are funny....I know mine won't make it into bigbaby's routine but here is my story.

My husband is ALWAYS right. Always. He knows everything and I'm not joking. He's super smart.

Yes, he leaves unfinished projects and has annoying habits but we all do. I have some compulsive behavior so I'm sure he could write a book about me.

A husband once said he was better at house cleaning,,,,,so I let him do all of it

Lol

Samkaren
Your resident dj

If we keep this up for a while longer ...

... maybe it could be edited a bit ...

... to make an instructive little Bedside Book?

o j

Somewhere there must be a man dominated forum. Perhaps one dealing with power tools. We need an annoying wife thread there for equal time. Now THAT would be funny!

Ron

Turnabout is fair play Ron!
By all means, start a thread outlining women's bad habits.
I'm sure OJ, Cynic and Softball would contribute.

As far as my annoying habits......I'll make sure I close the KT when I'm away from the computer so DH isn't tempted to post!