My two oldest live about 70 minutes away in Los Angeles, including my 2 young grandsons. My youngest lives all the way across the country in NYC. We see him 2 or 3 times a year when he comes out for holidays and visits. I see no minuses in living close by. The pluses mean that we can help out with babysitting or whatever, and we see each other often. We celebrate birthdays as well as holidays together often, around sharing the married kids with their in-laws. If I get bored, I can head up to visit my daughter and her family for the day.

Son lives 15 miles from me but it's seldom we have visits.

Grandson is away in college, so seeing him will be less than when he was in high school.

My son lives next door. I don't see him and his family as much as I would like to.
Plus
he's there when I need him
Minus
if he lived farther away we would have better & longer visits

My children live about 30 miles from me -no grandkids (yet?)

My DH kids live about 500 miles away (3 GKs) and 1500 miles away (1 GK).

We use the phone & face time alot. Wish we or they were closer.

DS, DIL, DGS and DGD are minimum 25 minutes south of us, in the NW part of Chicago. It can take much longer, depending on traffic on the expressway. Because DIL teaches in the Chicago public school system, they must reside within city boundaries. (I sometimes think you could go door to door along the outer boundaries of the city and find a cop, teacher, fireman, etc. on every block.)

This seems to be a good distance. We aren't in one another's pockets, and we tend to have long lunch visits at our home or we visit them and attend one of DGS's games. DIL's parents and one sister live five minutes away, so they are in and out more often. Can't have it both ways!

My daughter lives in Houston, about 45 minutes away from me. Plus...near enough to get together whenever we want to Can't think of any minus about it. I have no grandchildren and she has no plans to have any.

For our Maryland house, we live 5.4 miles from my daughter's family.
For our Florida condo, we live 7.1 miles away from our son's family.
We go back and forth about every 2-3 months, not just during the normal "snowbird" months. The whole reason for having the second place is to be near them.

Our older son lives in Louisville KY, about 6 hours from here. Younger son lives in the next room, lol

My oldest son has always lived where I now live. My middle son will move here this coming Sunday with his wife and my grandbabies, ages 1 and 3. My youngest will move here in February - VERY exciting for me.

My oldest daughter lives next town (about 7 miles) her 2 both grown, live in our town. Her oldest, my grandson, actually works for us..so see him every work day. Her daughter...with her busy life I see about once a week. MY youngest daughter just recently moved back to our small town from Las Vegas after a long sad divorce... so I see her not quite daily, but several times a week. Her 2 sons are in middle school, so I get to attend school games, and activities. I am very happy with situation

I have one daughter that has moved about 20 miles or so away since her husband passed away. She now lives with my oldest granddaughter and my great grandson. Two of my other children live about 4 to 6 miles away. I see the one daughter every day and the youngest daughter and our youngest granddaughter live a half mile away and I usually see them every day. Love living close to them and they seem to enjoy living close too. They all call me every day and sometimes more than once a day.

Sue

My kids and grands all live within 10 miles of me. I cannot think of one minus. Close enough to see each other whenever we want (or don't want) to. :)
I have never been a meddler, they can visit when they want and can invite me over when they want. I keep no score!! :)

We have one in town and one 6 hours away. We are much closer to the grandchildren in town. I love being available to them. DIL sometimes refers to me as Grammie 911 because the older one might call to see if he can come over to escape his younger brother or for anything.

I only have one daughter and she has a baby. It takes about 40 minutes to get to her house. I see her about once a week because I work in the town she lives in. DH sees her about once a month. My daughter's father in law lives 4 miles away. This is a problem for her. He is quite demanding on her husband's time. I think she would rather that we lived closer. We definitely give them their space.

Son and Grandson live with us.
Daughter, her hubby and our Granddaughter live almost four thousand miles away.

This post was edited by justgotabme on Fri, Oct 17, 14 at 19:06

I have 2 sons. One is 2 hours away and the other is about 7 minutes away. The 2-hours-away one we see about every other month. That's just about right - he and his wife come here and spend a night or two.

The one 7-minutes-away is too close. He's recently divorced and tends to be a bit clingy (understandable, I guess) and borrows a lot of stuff. It would help him stand on his own 2 feet if he lived further away from mommy and daddy.

All 3 of our kids live close by. Son lives about 35 minutes ( due to going through 4 small towns) away. Both daughters live around 20 minutes away. We see all of them a lot. Having blessed us with 8 Grandkids it is wonderful to be this close. They are on Fall break this week so I have had them for overnight. We also have a home in the Southern part of our state and they spend time with us there. I would hate for them to have to move.. Our family is really close and I am thankful for that.

One with kids is about a 70 minute drive. We see them 2-3 times a month, at our place, at theirs, or in-between. The others are plane flights of multiple hours away. We usually visit each once a year and they're home to visit at least once a year, sometimes twice.

We're in contact with each of them at least every few days, by phone, text, or email. All are busy leading their own lives and I really wouldn't have it any other way. We've all always gotten along pretty well but I think the distances help that. Visits in any direction are special and appreciated.

I have a friend who lives within 15 minutes of most of his siblings (family of 6 kids), and two of his own three, and frankly he gets along best with his one sibling and one kid who each live far away.

Child no.1: 9 miles
Child no.2: 600 miles
Child no. 3: 60 miles

Child no.s 1 & 3 are near enough to celebrate their Birthdays together. We see them about 2 times a year. We had hoped it would have been more often.

Child no.2 is the more sociable one and needs more help than the others, but is too far away for us to give a aid on short notice. She calls us about once a week for a chat. One or both of us makes an annual trip to visit her.

I wish my kids lived closer. I'm at the tip top of the Michigan UP. My son (youngest) lives near Rochester, MN, about an 8 hour drive away. He and my daughter in law have two little boys, age 3 and 1. We try to make it down there every other month to visit for a weekend, usually driving down after a half day of work on Friday, then driving home on Sunday. My daughter (oldest) and son in law live near Baltimore, MD. It's been two years since we've been there, but they have been back here at least 3 times since then (for my grandson's funeral (my step-daughter's sweet little Maison), for my my grandson in MN's baptism, and I believe for at least one other occasion. My step-kids mostly live close. Two right here in town, but we don't see them near as often as we'd like. One a two hour drive away. And the third is also long distance, living in Arkansas. The one that is two hours away is mom to another batch of grandkids that we definitely do NOT see enough! They are, for the most part, teenagers and adult, and like everyone that age, very, very busy. I get a text from my 15 year old grand-daughter periodically, saying "Grandma and Grandpa, I love you and I miss you". That makes our day!

Our oldest son lives about 30 minutes from us. Our youngest son lives in Florida. Both divorced. One grandson lives 15 minutes from us and his sister is in college 3 hours away. Their mom lives 10 minutes from us. Our other grand children live in Florida about an hour from their dad. As we age we are glad to have one son near in case we need him. We see him about once or twice a week. He calls all the time. I have a sister and a niece who live closer to us. It is nice to have some family nearby. We all help one another when needed.
Mary

We moved to Stratford to be near our DD and her family. We love being available to help out with the kids, and we get to see them more often, but we're not in their faces. They live in the West end of town and we live in the South end, about 7 minutes away.

All of mine live within ten miles so it's wonderful. We see them often and the same with the grands. I will say facebook is wonderful to message and post photos. I also have three sisters living in my town, when they got married they followed me lol. I love it.

All of my parents' children live within a 45 minute drive. My mom I see every week. My dad I see once every two or three months. My mom has an interest in what goes on in my life, and we talk daily. I think my other siblings (the adopteds and biological brother, but not my biological sister) seem to see dad more often. They grew up with him in their house every day, except the biological brother. They're just close because my brother wants to be close. Guess it's up to the kid and up to the parent, in my case? Something like that.

Pluses: I can help my mom with whatever she needs. Like setting her phone up, buying her a printer, taking her to the doctor... Go to lunch, she can see her grandson march during a football game. She gets to be as involved as she wants.

Minuses? I'd have to ask.

This post was edited by rob333 on Thu, Oct 16, 14 at 9:39

My two daughters who are in their mid 30's and unmarried both live and work in NYC. It's a hard 4 hour drive from me so I am more apt to get on a bus or train . I see them about four times a year but we always take a winter vacation together where we can have some serious girl time for a week in the sun. If I had grand children I would probably make more of an effort to see them more often.

Interesting replies. Kayjones, I can see why you're excited!

My daughter lives 17 miles away, which is considered pretty close in this rural area. When she was a divorced single mom she lived closer, and I saw her and my granddaughter often. Now that she's remarried, their house is great for entertaining, and our family gatherings usually take place there. My granddaughter is now 23. She and I get together fairly regularly. My daughter's stepdaughters go to school two miles from my house, so I attend their games and concerts.

My son and his wife built their house across the road from mine, beyond my barn. Now they have two little boys, and I am so blessed to have them all in my life.

I always said I was a Walton at heart. Without my son's help I wouldn't have been able to stay in this house, keep up the outbuildings, and manage the property. We both grow gardens and share the yield. I'm available to babysit when needed. I love seeing their house lights at night, especially in winter.

I can't think of any minuses. Happy to say I have a great relationship with my son-in-law and daughter-in-law.

25 year old DD is living in Bishkek, Krygystan teaching a sixth grade class at an American school. Way too far away for me, and even too far to visit because there is no direct or easy way to get there. She has summers off, though, and will be home. She is lonely, and texts me frequently. Her first college degree was Russian studies, so she speaks Russian and is getting to use it now.

23 year old DS is living in Berlin, Germany for a year now. We did go to see him last Christmas and he was home this summer. He did mention to my husband that he will probably come home to live in a year.

I think both of my kids will end up in Wisconsin because they love it and miss it. We also all get along really well, but I understand they are adventurous and want to see the world and now is the time to do it (before marriage and kids) but I do miss them and worry about them.

My daughter lives about 15 minutes north but since she works two jobs full time we rarely see her. She calls weekly to check in.
Our son and his wife and children live in NYC......a long ways away from the beautiful central coast!
We see them maybe once a year.
I had hoped to go see Jake and Mio over the summer but health problems prevented me from traveling. Now they are in school and both parents work full time. I don't like cold weather so am hoping they will come here for the holidays.
If I was rich and had lots of disposable income I would fly back for Mio's 6th birthday which is 10 days away.

DD #1 and family... about 85 miles away, one grandson in HS there, and the other one working about 4 hours away.

DD #2 and family... about 65 miles away, two children are home and the other in college about 120 miles away.

DS and wife life across the street from me....no children.

They all are here about 3 times a year for holidays...see the "at home" grandkids pretty often, if I go to the soccer fields or their activities~~ Don't see the ones out of the homes as often as I would like.

I try to have DS & DDIL over at least every two weeks for a meal and visit. It is a comfort to know they are close if I need them.

The girls call every week....and we all text often.

I wish I could see them more often, but they all have such busy lives of their own.

My daughter and her boyfriend live 10 minutes from my house in one direction (they have no children) and my son and his girlfriend live 10 minutes in another direction from me. They have a baby who will be 1 year old in a few weeks. My oldest son also lives with them. We are all very close, so we see the baby often (just got home 45 minutes ago, actually).

My son lives 25 miles away, in Lexington. He's still in college. I see him at least once a month. My daughter lives 2 hours away. She just spent Friday-Monday for Fall break here but I only spent part of Saturday with her because I was either working or she was with her friends in Lexington.

My in-laws live about an hour from us, about 1.5 hrs from their youngest, and about six hours from the middle son. The middle one visits maybe once a year. My MIL lives with the youngest and his wife about half of most weeks, depending on my SIL's work schedule, and keeps the three kids. She often cooks dinner so it's ready when SIL gets home. One of the kids is in school now, so sometimes FIL makes day trips to help out. Even though that puts them only about a half hour from us, we seldom see them because they are so busy with the kids and exhausted by the end of the day when we get off work.

All 3 are about 8 miles away - they live in the city and are within walking distance of each other. I love that they get together on weekends.

Our DD and DSIL live 1000 miles away. We see them between 4-7 times a year, at least 3 of those visits are 1 to 2 weeks and the others are often long weekends. So we get to see them a lot for the distance and talk on the phone almost every day. In a few years we will retire and move to be near them. It helps that they live in a town where we have been vacationing since she was 7 years old and we already own properties there.

Our son lives 30 minutes away, but comes by once or twice a week. When I go to his city, I usually call him and we go out to dinner. He usually calls me or his father or sends a text regularly too. Sometimes when we need to help him with something we wish he was closer, but DH is retiring soon which will make it easier.

Our daughter lives one block over and is expecting her first baby. Her husband asked about the house next door to us, as he would be interested in moving there. That would work out very well, as we are good at giving space, but we all, son included, help each other out with various things. Actually, a couple of times our SIL's parents have pitched in with us with projects, and I have done things for them too. It's a very, very nice situation. Can't see a con as none of us cramp anyone's space.

Oh, and in the day time, the kids are in various cities for work, and on break they often initiate three way texts with me and them to discuss issues, chit chat about a podcast we all listen to, or something like that. They both have busy lives, so it's a nice way to stay connected.

My oldest DD, SIL and granddaughters, 7 and 4 moved about thousand miles away. I'm not even going to try to drive that far. The same day she moved, my second DD moved about 600 miles away with my other 4 year old GD. . I can make that drive, but will probably fly there as well.
My youngest DD just moved back home. She was about 1300 miles away so I am happy.
My son, DIL, and 2 year old GD live about 36 miles away.
I do my best to keep in touch with all four kids.