If the ratio of animal maure to vegetative waste is about the optimal 3 parts vegetative waste to 1 part animal manure, and the amount of air and water in that mix are adequate the bacteria that digest that material will get to work fast. Compost can be made in 14 days. Water excludes air so too much water in the mix can cause the digestion process to become anerobic, in the abscence of air, which is the process used by digesters that capture the methane released by that process. Here is a link that might be useful: Compost in 14 days

I hope there are some parents out there that could help me understand this. We don't understand any of this. Can someone out there help me understand where she may be coming from? Your DIL may be doing this out of spite or some other negative reason. I'm not defending her choices or saying she's right to make the choices she's making. But assuming she has your grandson's best interest at heart, here are some other perspectives from a parent. I've known many shy kids and watched them grow up over the years. Some parents believe their shy child needs more time at home to gain a little maturity. But other parents believe their shy child needs to be in situations where they are a little less sheltered and where they're exposed to other kids and have to learn to connect with other kids. I've seen both approaches be very successful. When my kids were younger I knew several shy children whose parents sent them to daycare or preschool, etc., even when those children had grandparents who wanted to keep them. Another place she may be coming from - I think in many families the mom gets to the point where she feels the need to mark her territory, so to speak, with the grandparents. Just my own opinion, but to me it's always seemed more likely to happen in families where the grandparents spend a lot of time with the grandchildren. My own mother is a wonderful grandma, the best ever, and she adores my kids and they adore her. She lives very close and spends a lot of time with them. My mom is great, but she did at times seem (to me) to think her opinion about what's best for them was equal in weight to mine. I did at one point feel the need to make it clear - my kids, my rules. Anyway, I can see where that situation could be exacerbated in a divorce situation. I know if I was the grandma I would be concerned about losing time with my grandchild, mom is probably concerned about losing time or control, I could see where a mom might want to put a little distance between her child and his grandparents. I think for some parents who divorce it comes as quite a shock after the divorce that they have so little control over their child's environment when the child is with the ex or the ex's family. She doesn't have a relationship with her own family. If she comes from an uninvolved family, she may not value those grandparent ties as much as some people do. If she grew up with uninvolved grandparents, she may not see the value on that close grandparent/grandchild relationship. I don't know what kind of daycare they have picked out, but the day cares around here have some terrific programs. They take kids to amusement parks, water parks, zoos, horseback riding, pools, etc. I know several parents that transitioned from grandparent care for younger children to day care for older children just because of the opportunities for sports and other activities. Just because your grandson is crying now doesn't mean he won't like it by the end of the summer. once school starts they will let him stay with us on a week-end here and there. If your grandson's schedule is anything like our kids' at that age, then I can certainly see why once school starts the parents will only agree to the occasional weekend. At 7 and 8 years old, by the time your grandson gets home from school, has a snack and plays with his friends, does his homework, eats dinner and showers, the day is over. There's not a lot of time during the week. Factor in sports, cub scouts, etc., and there's even less. Particularly in a divorce situation I can see why mom and dad wouldn't want to give up many weekends to grandparents. The good news is that if they actually do divorce, perhaps your son will welcome your help and your company even if your DIL doesn't. Even if your DIL doesn't agree to weekends, hopefully your son will include you when he has custody. If your DIL isn't close to her own family, you may get more time with your grandson than you think. If she works full time, she may need your help when he's sick or she may need help dropping him off or picking him up at sports or camps, etc. Hopefully if your DIL gets some space now, she may come to realize what a treasure she has in you, even if she has divorced your son. Right now she's probably stressed and upset and not thinking clearly, even if she wants the divorce. Having said all that, it does sound like a lot of change for your 7 year old grandson. You're probably right that it would help if he could stick to his old routine of staying with you. I'm so very sorry.

I'm very sorry to hear your story. Bad parents leave a void in your life and you have to find something to fill the void. I am a firm believer in letting stuff go that I can't change. I know that sounds simple, but it can be done. It's just a matter of occupying your mind with something else. I was married to a man for 33 years who was a good husband, but a very cold man. No hugs, kisses or any affectionate behavior. My mom gave me some very good advice. She said, "you are spending to much time thinking of his faults, spend that time thinking of his good qualities". It worked.

No, no surprise though. It's hard enough to see the immediate family without seeing all of the grandparents, the ex grandparent, step grandparents, etc..