My SIL passed away this am

15 years ago

They had just evacuated from Gustov. Got home, and night before last, she cooked them supper (no power, used generator). Well, she went to bed and awoke about 3am unable to breathe. My bro. called 911, they lost her twice enroute to the hospital. She never regained consciousness. They did an EEG and she was brain dead due to lack of oxygen. They turned the vent off at 10:24 this am, and she passed. We are all in shock. NO idea what caused her airway to be blocked. Please say a prayer for my bro. and family. They have a Down's syndrome dgt. that's really taking this hard.

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Comments (50)

Jamie_LA
Original Author
15 years ago
By the way, that's sister in law.
caflowerluver
15 years ago
I am so sorry for your loss. Did she have any pre-existing conditions that come with age? I am sending prayers and good thoughts.
Clare
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I was surprised to see this thread come up again. I see why, now. I am so sorry to hear about your Mother, Meriaux. I know it's small comfort at the time, but the thing that helped me get through it was knowing that people have done this before. A lot of us here have been through it. I absolutely understand how you feel, I lost my Mom in 2002. I have no brothers or sisters and not much other family so I understand feeling alone. The fact that you were so close makes it all the harder to go on without her, but you have her memory to guide you. The torch is passed. You know she would want you to do your best. At least you got to know your Mom, and she loved you. Some don't even have that much. I know your Mom would tell you should in NO way feel guilty about your premonition. Premonitions don't cause things to happen, any more than the weather forecast causes it to rain. Death is just a part of life. It will happen to us all one day. Your Mother was close to my age, and I hope you don't think it irreverent to talk about, but if I had to pick a way to go I'd want to go quick. It would be a shock to the survivors, though I guess, with no time to adjust. But it's heart breaking to have to watch a loved one suffer, sometimes for years. Mother's Day wasn't that long ago. Things are still really fresh for you. Trust me, it will ease with time. There have been many words of sympathy and comfort that have been written. I kindof liked this one.I hope y'all don't mind if I include the poem I picked for my Mother's holy card (or whatever they call them these days). (I knew she'd want one for the funeral as that's what she believed in) I chose a more modern picture of a kindly Jesus embracing someone who has just "come home"... Don't think of her as gone away Her journey's just begun Life holds so many facets This earth is only one Just think of her as resting From the sorrows and the tears In a place of warmth and comfort Where there are no days and years Think how she must be wishing That we could know, today Now nothing but our sadness Can really pass away And think of her as living In the hearts of those she touched For nothing loved is ever lost And she is loved so very much. -Anonymous
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Thank you all for your kind thoughts! Our modem on the computer wasn't working on Tuesday night. It started out fine but completely died around 8:00 p.m. I tried rebooting the computer and turning the DSL box off and on. Nothing worked. When I looked at the computer settings, the modem wasn't being recognized so I figured it croaked. I watched TV the rest of the night and sulked. The computer worked just fine for Bob later Tuesday night after I went to bed. On Wednesday, it worked just fine too. I was finally able to look at my Facebook page and saw a post from my brother with a link to the eulogy he wrote for Mary's memorial on Tuesday night! I totally missed her memorial/wake! I was so hurt that no one told me about it. Then I checked my cell phone and called my voicemail. My sister left a message on Monday telling me about the wake. I never saw anything on my cell phone saying I had a message. I am convinced that Mary was haunting me on Tuesday night and made the modem on my computer stop working. I think she was telling me she was a little upset that I didn't make her memorial and wasn't able to say my formal good-bye. I feel so hurt and upset that no one made sure I knew when it was! I check my email and Facebook every day so they could have contacted me that way. I feel so awful that I am embarrassed to go to Mary's daughter's wedding in a couple of weeks. They will think I'm an awful person for missing her memorial. I don't have any of their phone numbers or email addresses. *sigh* As if her death wasn't bad enough. At least I know she cares enough to haunt me.
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Marie, Thank you so much for taking the time to write. I have been doing some research on so good books to read, thank you for the advice. I also called my insurance company today to get the name of a good therapist, I am hoping that will help. I do have 2 sisters, 3 sons and several very close cousins. I just feel so bad calling them and crying all the time. I know they are all there for me as I am for them but like I said I hate getting them upset by hearing me upset. Pictures? I think you mean as in my family that passed? If so yes I have thousands. The only problem I am having is I had to hide all of the pictures as I cannot look at any of them. I feel so bad for doing that, it just hurts so bad to see them. I think a journal would be a good idea thank you for that suggestion. It was so odd that you said "I saw a pretty butterfly", I say this because a few days after my mom passed away I asked her to please come and visit me, I knew that she loved butterflies so I asked her if she could come visit me as a butterfly. I cannot tell you how many times I have been out on my deck or any place where I was thinking or crying about my Mom when out of nowhere a beautiful butterfly appears! I know that sounds crazy but it helps me to think my mom is around me. It does look like I am going to be going through a second divorce, I hate to say that because I am so against them, I just dont know what other choice I have. I have a 2 year old granddaughter and 2 year old grandson that have become my whole world, I dont mind being alone and watching them grow to be wonderful people. Its also interesting that you talked about volunteer work as I have been doing some research for my area on volunteer work, I am hoping that maybe I can keep my mind busy and at the same time help someone else. I just wish I knew how long it will take until I can get by just one day without crying for my family that has passed. I love them all dearly but like I said for some reason when my mom passed I feel like my heart just shattered. Thank you again for your kindness and good advice. I will update on this forum from time to time to let everyone know how I am doing. I was reading other stories this evening and my heart goes out to everyone who is going through the same thing. I tried to write to a few but just as I started the tears started. Just please anyone who knows this feeling or who has lost a loved one, I am thinking of you and understand how bad it hurts. Thank you again... have a wonderful week. Lorene
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How fortunate you are, and thankful you can be, that your family has been so close, for the people in many families have nursed their grievances with the result that get-togethers are only partly pleasant ... and I know that you are not thinking about such things at the moment. Now you can help your brother find his way through this, and he you. I hope that you can find enough greater pleasure in remembering times with your mother than the pain associated with them that sharing them can help ease the pain for both of you. Perhaps in the coming days you may find that others have cherished memories of your mother that you've not been aware of, which will help you be more thankful for her life and the influence that she had on others, as well. One of the most effective ways that we can show our respect and appreciation for the good things that were in the lifestyle of others is to go out and do similar things as we carry on our lives, altered somewhat as indicated to fit into our way of living. Good thoughts and hopes for both of you, and for others who loved her, as you go along this painful journey, and some prayers offered on your behalf. ole joyful
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minivanmom
15 years ago
I am so sorry for your loss.

Donna
Jamie_LA
Original Author
15 years ago
Nothing at all medically. Healthy! That's what's sooooo shocking.
gardenspice
15 years ago
Jamie,
I'm really sorry.
Sending best thoughts, especially for the Dear daughter.
lisa_fla
15 years ago
Unreal. So sorry to hear this. Maybe it was undiagnosed heart problems? The stress might have made it worse. Sending best thoughts.
grinch_gut
15 years ago
I am so sad to read this....praying for your family! Stacy
lydia1959
15 years ago
That's so sad. Sending good thoughts and prayers for the family.
phyllis__mn
15 years ago
I'm sending caring thoughts to the whole family. It is hard when it is so sudden.
evatx
15 years ago
I'm so sorry! I will keep all of you in my thoughts.
glenda_al
15 years ago
Sorry for the loss!
My thoughts are with you and your brother!
tami_ohio
15 years ago
Sending prayers for you and your family.

Tami
donna37
15 years ago
Oh what a shock and how very sad. Sending special thoughts and prayers for you and the family, esp. the DD.
lindyluwho
15 years ago
Oh, this is so sad. Please accept my condolences.

Linda
FlamingO in AR
15 years ago
I am so sorry, Pookie. My condolences to the whole family. I wonder if it could have been an allergic reaction to something?
sooey
15 years ago
I'm so sorry to hear this. I will keep you all in my thoughts.

sooey
petaloid
15 years ago
I'm very sorry for your family's loss.
hayjud_mn
15 years ago
Jamie,
I am so sorry for your loss.
Prayers for comfort and strength for your family.
Linda Wayman
15 years ago
I'm very sory for your loss. My prayers to the family.

Linda
patches_02
15 years ago
Thought and prayers go out to you and your family.
nodakgal
15 years ago
I am so sorry.
Saying prayers for her family!
okwriter
15 years ago
How very sad... I'll keep the family in my prayers.
Kathsgrdn
15 years ago
I'm so sorry, how awful.
hallngarden
15 years ago
Will continue to pray for you and your family. Also a special prayer for the precious daughter. Keep the faith.
justlinda
15 years ago
What a terrible tragedy. Please accept my condolences.
gramzeeinmd
15 years ago
I am so sorry to hear this about your SIL and for their daughter.
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your fmaily.
Deb
ronm80
15 years ago
I am sorry about the lost of our sister in law. I will be praying for your family.
stephanie_in_ga
15 years ago
What a great loss to your family, she sounds very loved and deeply missed. My thoughts are with your family, especially her daughter.
Mickey15
15 years ago
I'm so sorry for your loss Jamie. I will keep you and your brother's family in my prayers.
Tammy
liz
15 years ago
awww Jamie...I'm so sorry to hear this...my thoughts and prayers for all of you...
lulie___wayne
15 years ago
Jamie, I'm really sorry. Such sadness in this world!
Lu
wildchild
15 years ago
I am so sorry for your loss Jamie. What awful news.
alisande
15 years ago
What a shock for all of you. I hope they determine the cause, at least. But still, so sad.
katclaws_mo
15 years ago
My deepest sympathies to all of your family.
Sending Special thoughts & prayers.
vicki_lv_nv
15 years ago
bopeep
15 years ago
I am so sorry.
(((PRAYERS)))
bopeep
donna_oh
15 years ago
Jamie, I'm sorry to hear this.

My Deepest Sympathies to all of you-

God Bless you, Donna (^_^)
wanda_va
15 years ago
My sympathies to you and your family. Sending special thoughts and prayers your way, and asking God to comfort and support you in the coming days. Hugs.
intherain
15 years ago
Jamie, my sympathies are with you and your family.

Sheryl
gwanny2three
15 years ago
Such sadness on here lately. Prayers and sympathies to your family.
gazania_gw
15 years ago
So sorry for your loss. My deepest sympathy to all who loved her.
ladonna
15 years ago
Im so sorry for your family's loss. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.
clubm
15 years ago
I'm so sorry for your loss. Thoughts going your way.
summer_tx
15 years ago
(((((Jamie))))), I'm so very sorry to hear about your SIL. My prayers to your family at this devastating time.
Pieonear
15 years ago
Jamie, I'm so sorry you and your family are going through this terrible loss.
Velleen78
15 years ago
Again I join another KT member in the loss of their loved family member. Vince and I send our SYMPATHY TO YOU. Velleen.
carla35
15 years ago
That is so sad to hear. Could it have been a generator-related CO death? I know those happen sometimes with power outages and generator use. I would bet they ruled that out, but thought I'd mention it just in case.
ritamay91710
15 years ago
my gosh, such sadness here lately..... sending prayers for your family.
williamsburgjane
15 years ago
So sorry for you and your family's loss. Sending special thoughts and warm hugs for all of you.
dirt_yfingernails
15 years ago
Hugs and prayers for you and your family.

My SIL passed away this am

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