If you are feeling overwhelmed by Christmas at any point in the year, that's a sign that you need to scale it wwaaayyyyy back.

It should be a happy season, not stressful. Scale back on the gifts, everyone will understand, I am sure.

Oh, I'm definitely scaling back. That was part of my point. I've always made some gifts and bought others; this year I'm mostly making. I think the sewing thing is what's bothering me more than anything. I used to sew a lot, mostly in binges. But that was a long time ago. I'm just hoping it's like riding a bicycle.....

Good for you for heading back to a simpler time. Remembering what the holiday is about should be the fore front, not an afterthought.

I think that just about everything is now overwhelming and way out of hand. Two months ago a friend of mine invited us to a huge birthday party FOR A 1 YEAR OLD! And I mean huge! They rented a venue, had it catered and provided entertainment...and we don't even have kids! I just think it is time to get back to reality, and I don't mean reality as seen on TV. Where the heck are our values heading? It frightens me.

But you're substituting one stressor (shopping/money) for another, which can be as bad or even worse, involving lots of time and dredging up old skills that you haven't used in a long time.

It's a trade, but it is not scaling back.

Sushipup has a very good point. If making the gifts is stressful, don't do that *either*.

I've never been 'craft-y', so that's out. I'm not at all ashamed to give a carefully chosen card with a gift card inside -- for any occasion. IF I happen to see something someone would like, that's different, but I don't go out with a list of names and try to 'match' presents to the names. Been there. Done that. Hated it!

How about you MAKE just the cards?

Lynn, I have a real aversion to the current trend in children's parties. So over the top! And so unnecessary. I fondly remember the parties of my childhood. My mom was very creative, and we had fun themes that she enjoyed making things for. No clowns or petting zoos--just a bunch of little kids having fun together.

Oh, dear, Chisue--don't even mention the cards! LOL I'm famous for my Christmas letters, which are normally not the usual sort of newsy missives. I put some time into those, too. But this year I have good family news to share (my daughter's wedding and my son's baby), so maybe I'll just do that instead.

I see your point, Sushipup. I'm scaling back on $$, not time. Most years I shop all year round, picking up things that I find by accident, things I know the recipients will like. Because of unpleasant distractions, I didn't do much of that this year.

I love making things for people, and it's important to me that I give meaningful gifts, so my plan is good. I think the basic problem is that I didn't allow myself enough time to make these gifts in a more or less leisurely fashion. Maybe I should quit making applesauce and fire up the sewing machine. LOL

Or you could gift people with applesauce, alisande. Only half kidding 'cause I love home-made applesauce! We buy only for our kids/GKs now and they are getting Visa gift cards. I found Bilz boxes on Amazon. They are mazes where you can't get the card until you get the little ball through the maze. We got something similar 6 or 7 years ago and they all had the best time with them. Plus, they can be reused to give to others. That may sound lazy, but I don't feel like being stressed out over a holiday to the point I forget the whole meaning of the season.

It is like riding a bicycle, Susan. Like you, I used to do a lot of sewing and in days gone by, I used to design as well as sew. Now, alas, my sewing is usually limited to home decor items...one of which I'm starting in a few minutes. [I stopped by for a momentary pause to buy myself some readying time.] Also...like you...I sit and stare at my machine hoping it still "loves" me. ;-) It always does and my fears are always unfounded. So...gather up your courage and plug it in. Don't be like me several years ago when I froze and waited until the very last minute to tackle a project. It was a success...but I was a wreck. Never again!

Anne

I think you will be ok. You are in your planning stage later than usual and it is always overwhelming at first don't you think?It is understood you have had a lot to deal with this year. The spirit of the holiday will push you thru.

Since the weather hasn't changed, many people are not yet panicked. As soon as it gets a little colder and the time changes everyone suddenly is overwhelmed. I do what you usually do and shop during the year for others.
How about giving applesauce for a gift? Sounds yummy to me.

I don't think this is an issue of needing to scale back but instead it's a problem of procrastination and poor time management (two things I also suffer from greatly). Fortunately you still have about 3 months so put the stress aside and get to work and you should be fine. (I'm laughing at myself as I type this because I really should not be giving this kind of advice since I never follow it myself!)

Give yourself permission to do only that which you feel able to do. Christmas should be about joy and love, not stress. For myself, some years I accomplish a lot and some years I don't, but I've realized that my friends and family enjoy the time we spend together more than any gift I could give them.

My local family has given up on individual gifts for Christmas and birthdays, except the 2 youngsters still get BD gifts (cash).

We do a traditional dinner and then Dirty Santa at Christmas. Picking and choosing from a bunch of wrapped packages, and then swapping, etc. is a lot of fun, and no worries about wrong size, wrong color, or whatever.

For us, it is the being together and remembering earlier years back when.

Surely removes the stress factor.

Sue

I think sewing is a bit like jumping on a bicycle. Once you get started, you will be fine. Keep things simple. Did I tell you how much I like Appleauce?

Susan, how about a non-sewing project. No-sew fleece blankets. I did that a few years ago as Christmas gifts and just had a blast doing. Everyone is still using their blankets, which are really a throw not a full blanket.

You easily find instructions online and if I can do it, anyone can do it. :-)

Jodi-

Here is a link that might be useful: No sew fleece blanket images

I agree, you're trading one stress for another stress, and Christmas shouldn't be stressful.

The best thing our family ever did was quit giving presents to EVERYONE and just draw names so everyone only has to buy/give one present. That has made Christmas so much more enjoyable for everyone...less money spent, less time spent shopping, less decisions to make, less scramble to get it all done = less stress.

And guess what? Everyone enjoys Christmas more even though they only get one present each. That one gift for each demonstrates the spirit of giving just fine. :)

I have been cutting back for several years. Nothing to nieces and nephews, only to GK's and greats,and even now cutting back. Cutting out cards to those I haven't seen from for years or just once a year. Instead will do more local--Angel Tree, to families who have lost so much, military families, GD needs a small freezer, so will get that for her and hubby. GGS needs a new bed etc.
Others get gift cards which is fine for all of us.

Every family approaches Christmas differently. My family simplified many years ago. We have a limit of $25 per person. The idea is to get together more so than doing gifts. Mom reminded me many a time, that not everyone appreciates a home made gift. Often craft stores have all sorts of little knick-knacks that with a little dressing up work well. I give alot of food gifts. The goal is to find out what treats people like, home made or store bought. One year I bought pecan sandies for dad & dipped them in chocolate, my sister likes cream cheese frosting and graham crackers.

Christmas should be about family and god, not about gifts and driving yourself nuts. Simplify, relax and enjoy- thats my motto.

I agree that it sounds like you are trading one stress for another... but I'm guessing you already have a idea of what you are making for gifts. I think once you start it will go well, especially if you start soon. If you see it is going to be too much work, you can always scale back... make a smaller or more simple gift and add that to a small store bought item that goes with the theme.

I am not feeling stressed at all. I have come to realize how silly and useless it is to do so. I will give some gifts, mostly to my grandkids..but nothing extravagant.
Christmas is a time to be with family, and to share in the reason behind Christmas.. I am certain the ones who love me could really care less about the gift they are recieving from me, if they thought it created undo stress and or inconvience.
I remember in the past trying to find just that PERFECT gift for all those on my list,putting a lot of thought into each one... nowdays not so much.
Many of the adults in my family and also close friends have stopped exchanging..We all know we still love and care for each other..
The adults that are on my list usually get something practical gift cert. to thier favorite restaurant,a jar of home made jam,etc..I like to give something that I know will be used up, we all have too much STUFF already!
I like to relax, enjoy the holidays, and the festivities,the shopping that I do, is done for the most part with out stress...I so hate that idea of just buying SOMETHING to have a gift.... SO SILLY!!!
If you enjoy making gifts, and have the time good for you, but it should be a joy and a pleasure to do so...if not then simply don't do it..

Nope, on my end!

Christmas just isn't what it used to be when having family was meaningful and joyful. Hasn't been that way in a while :o(

oh my Glenda, that sounds so sad.... don't you spend some time with your beloved grandson over Christmas..??

We don't do presents anymore. It was sad at first, but now I love it. It's fun to open things but I have too much. It's NOT fun trying to find special gifts fighting crowds, and I'm not into homemade. No one would want my gift. I only buy for two grandkids and they like clothes. Hollister and American Eagle... here I come..

I think Paula hit the nail on the head. I plead guilty when it comes to time management. I'm not as big a procrastinator as I used to be, but I'm more easily distracted than I used to be, if that's possible. Between visits to my recuperating granddaughter and my own physical therapy, I'm not at home nearly as much as I assumed I'd be, and that hasn't helped either. I appreciate the reassurance that all will go well once I dive in!

Another factor is my relative lack of energy. When my kids were growing up, I'd get up early to sew for an hour before they awoke, and then I'd sew again when they went to bed. These days my window of energetic opportunity is much smaller--and after 7:00 p.m. I hesitate to embark on anything that requires thought. LOL

I love Christmas, and one reason is the opportunity to give things to my family. My family is not large: two surviving children and their spouses, two grandchildren, two step-grandchildren. I enjoy thinking up meaningful gifts for them. We've never gotten into Christmas extravaganzas, so the gifts needn't be expensive. I agree completely about STUFF. If my family were as large as I used to imagine when I was young, I would consider the idea of a present-limiting plan. Some of those can be fun. Thanks, everyone!

We stopped giving to extended family long ago. It took a little bit longer for the rest of the family to realize that it wasn't worth all the stress and expense to give "everybody" something. But we still try to get a gathering of everyone during the holiday.

The "bestest" get together we had was a cookie exchange. Yes, some of the younger adults didn't bake their own and brought store-bought, but that was fine. It was just a fun time. And there were 5 generations in the house!

Well we mostly just exchanged greeting cards and such last year it was no fun for me I like the planning ahead and the getting stuff and wrapping etc. I hope to change it a little this year.
I'm not asking "what should we do this year?" I'm going ahead and making my boxes to send

I am. I know I'll be working an insane schedule through Xmas and New Years. It's been years since I had to do this. I'll be scaling down quite a bit to reduce the stress. Simple decorations this year and much less shopping!

I loved Cheristmas when I was a child and when my kids were little. Then I lost my job in 2005 (due to illness, kidney failure) and with less income I've had to cut back on gift giving.Now I only give gifts to the little ones (four all together). I try to bake cookies or knit something for the adults. This year will be very sad-my first without my Mother. She enterd the hospital Christmas Eve 2010 and passed on January 15.

Alisande, I'm with you. I'm very organized; so, that isn't it. As for cutting down, there's so much you can cut down. Anymore than that and it'd become neglecting.

Like you, it is the lack of physical energy. I am no longer as quick and my disability is just getting worse this year.

Last year, I put so much into making everyone in my family an heirloom piece of jewelry (made of pearls from our dad and mom) to keep. They somehow spoiled the whole thing. I'm not sure whether it's worth for me to be that thoughtful to them or not. They're not to me but I try not to be like them.

Anyway, I blame it on the timing of Christmas in the US. We have 3 holidays/celebrations too close together: October = Halloween, November = Thanksgiving (which is pretty big planning too), December = Christmas. These 3 are too close together. In my family, by the time New Year comes, no one cares. We're just too tired. And then with us Asian, 1 month or so later, here comes the Lunar New year! And that's pretty big too.

I'm exhausted just thinking about it. I feel like I need 1 extra month in between each celebration.

We do not let Christmas overwhelm us or the budget. When my children were living with us, we always got something for each of them, but it was never extravagent. We continued gift giving for some time after they left the home fold, but were nearby. It was more important for us to get together; The gifts were a side-dressing. Now, that the children are located farther away, we stopped formal giving of gifts but continued get togethers as much as possible. This year, two of our children are struggling financially. Thankfully, the burden of "have to get a gift for everyone" has been eliminated. Small gifts do appear on an informal basis.

Sometimes not everyone can be present. We are thankful to enjoy the presence of those who can be there. A family phone call might be made to the missing members. This is the one day of the year when my wife prepares a family meal, but that has been getting increasingly difficult as we age. For the past 2 years, instead of having the wife make a meal, we've gone out for dinner. That has been my gift to the family. There are 2 or 3 resturants nearby who serve up a nice Christmas dinner that is well within my budget.

Some of this method stems from my wife's father. He was a Minister of the Gospel, since deceased ( rest his soul). He saw first hand too much hardship on families who overspent on Christmas because they felt it was the thing to do, and to "keep up with the Jones". He developed a dislike of the commercialism of Christmas. It showed in his sermons. He tried to steer the flock away from the commercial aspect and focus on the spirit of Christmas and family values. Giving was good, but not to excess. Remeberance was important.

So, we don't let Christmas overwhelm. We strive for a renewal of spirit and family closeness.

Nope - haven't even thought about Christmas yet. I don't think about it or start doing anything about it until after Thanksgiving.

Christmas around our house will be low key. I love to decorate and make things cheery. I have few people to shop for and won't be spending a ton of money. Christmas dinner with family is the part I enjoy the most.

I really have cut down my Christmas card list. A box of 50 is more than enough. Last year I joined the Christmas card exchange here at KT and had a wonderful time receiving so many cards. I only give gifts to kids under ten, which means 4 things to buy. We usually get together with my husband's two sisters sometime in November or December. We go to a restaurant or get together at one house for a simple dinner. Last year it was pizza and hot hero sandwiches. I brought a plate of home-made cookies, which went over well. When I brought up the subject of no gift exchanging several years ago, everyone seemed relieved.My decorating is down to three things-a wreath on the door, a small table-top tree and a Nativity Set on a table. Do what you can, what you enjoy. Hand made gifts are wonderful! My husband has one brother whose wife always makes gifts for family. One year a scented candle, another a festively painted coffee can filled with candy.

I love Christmas.....having family & friends over, the smell of cookies baking, making candy, the quite nights with the tree lights glowing & the fireplace lit. I cut way back a couple of years ago after a lay-off. The stress of trying to buy gifts, keeping it 'even' between the kids & family was spoiling my love of the holidays. Now I make special jellies, salsa, pumpkin butter in the fall to give as presents. This year I made a beer jelly to go on roast beef sandwiches, a cherry wine sauce & green tomato chutney! When we get together, everyone brings a dish to pass....makes it fun to share our special 'food' holiday memories. We started to play games again & enjoy each others company :) That is what everyone will remember.

Enjoy the Season,
Ginger

I'm really surprised that you are not using your camera for your gifts.........A special photograph and a simple frame??? You could print off copies of all the photos of yourself and your close family for family albums for your children and grands.

Did that a couple of years ago, Ruthie. :-)

In fact, one of the gifts was a picture of my son's 12-story ham radio tower.

Nice thought!

Why don't pick a project that will work for all the adults on your list, Susan? Then make 20 of them, or however many you need- like coasters, or sets of them, or mug rugs, (oversized coasters) or a placemat/napkin set? Then do them assembly line fashion and get em all done at once. A few stuffed toys or special pillowcases for the kids or little wallets or purses and voila, you'll be done!

If you google "pattern for coasters" you'll find some really simple but wonderful ones!

we are only, because we accidently dumped the christmas stockings of up to 35 years old, and have to repalce them...and finding 18 stockings is huge...we found a few at a local year round place, but not happy...been waiting to go down to hobby lobby..kind of a chore for me since they're about 40 minutes away...

since we don't do christmas at our house (i have a cat and everyone complains) at least i don't have to worry about decorating other than for what we enjoy...

I have been knitting "dishclothes" for the past month. Am going to give my adult friends and family 2 each. Have designed a special wrapper that I am going to print out and wrap around them.

My plan a couple years ago was to make coasters with my travel photos for all my co-workers. Bought all the supplies, found several 'how to' sites but sadly never found the time to do anything with it. Probably won't get to it until I retire (in five or ten years) and then I won't have any co-workers to give them to. :-)

Jodi-

I scaled back years ago to the point where I said no more gifts. Family finally understood that I wasn't giving and didn't want to receive. Makes my life easier

Samkaren
Your resident dj