Remember Brad, my friends son?

15 years ago

I posted about my friends son Brad and his struggles (and surgeries) for Colitis. It's been almost 2 years since his surgery and he's had problems off and on since. He's been to the doctor and was told he basically needed an antacid.

His mom recently got new medical insurance and he started seeing a new doctor. Well, to make a very long story short, he was misdiagnosed all this time. He does not have Colitis. He has Crohns Disease. As a result, over the last 2 years of having it untreated, his small intestine (the only one he has left, they already removed the large) is in very bad shape. He will be having surgery in a few weeks again and it's very likely that they will have to remove the entire intestine and he will have a permanent colostomy.

This news is angering and devastating to all of us that love Brad. His parents are trying to learn as much as they can about all of this but it's all came on pretty sudden.

If you could send some special thoughts his way, I'd really appreciate it. He'll be 17 on Sept. 9 and will most likely be having surgery around that time. His last few birthdays have been so uneventful thanks to this horrible sickness. My heart breaks for him.

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (30)

Jodi_SoCal
15 years ago
Oh Steph I'm so sorry to hear the latest news about Brad. I remember when he had the other surgery. My thoughts are with him as he faces his next challenge. I hope there is some way to save what he has left of his intestines.

Jodi-
vicki_lv_nv
15 years ago
My heart breaks for Brad. It is extremely unfair that he has been misdiagnosed for so long.

((((Brad))))
Related Discussions
How to teach son to be good big brother & friend
Q
Comments (16)
Dear nsf798, You don't know me, soforgive me for putting in my two cents. I don't have the problem you are having, I've got two girls who are 9 and 7 and they are very good friends and though they have their struggles they play together very well. I will say that they have very different personalities and that though the elder gets/deserves many perks for her maturity the younger one is more forward and agressive and often gets what she wants by being so pushy. I really agreed with paigct's comment that enlisting your son to help your younger daughter is one way to handle this, but I also kind of agree with whoever posted that what appears to be a problem from your point of view might not be from the little sisters point of view. That being said, I want to recommend two fantastic books by Nancy Samalin (don't know her and am not connected to her). At least I think they are both by her but on reflection I think one isn't. The first one is How to talk so children will listen and how to listen so children will talk. I found taht really invalable (more so as my children got older) in helping me think through the dynamics of an interaction before I got started, and also in helping me think about modeling solutions rather than talking about problems. Another great book, and I'm sure this is by samalin, is "loving each one best" a book about siblings. And the last great book is called "raising the optimistic child" or "raising an optimistic child." This is a great book for working with children on problem solving rather than blaming. It makes a good read along with "how to talk..." I guess what I'm trying to say is that 1) your son sounds like he is having a burgeoning problem with kids his age; 2) he may or may not have a problem with his little sister but you certainly have one with the way he is treating her; 3) some of these problems could be addressed by working with him on common courtesy. I have had the intersting experience of driving someone else's kids to summer camp for a week. What amazed me is that things that seemed to come naturally to my daughters simply had never even occured to the two little girls I'm now driving. Sharing a snack? forget it. Both of them stuffed their mouths for the entire drive without ever offering my girls a taste--even as my daughters instantly and courteously offered their snacks for sharing. Saying hello and goodbye to us in the morning and afternoon? forget it, it simply never occured to them. Thanking me for driving? apparently that was also inconceivable. The difference in age between me and these girls is considerable (some 40 years) but I'm as courteous to them as I would be to another adult. Which is by way of saying that I think the excuse that your son is 4 years older than his sister so he naturally gets to boss her around is, well, not right. You want him to have good manners whatever the age or station of the person he's with. Perhaps helping him see that close relations (whether family or friend) don't excuse bad behavior is the way to go. just my two cents abfab
...See More
My son's going to be in Harrisburg PA for a week.
Q
Comments (10)
I work right in Harrisburg every day. Will he be right in the city or the outskirts? Will he have a car? Harrisburg is a nice city but it's not lousy with museums or anything. We have 'Restaurant Row' so there are lots of restaurants and bars on one street near a few of the larger hotels so if he's with a group, they have someplace to go. Most hotels outside the city are near shopping, restaurants and bars too. Don't ask me where the hot spots are. I don't remember the last time I was in a bar or club.
...See More
Remember my friend's son you all sent cards to?
Q
Comments (5)
Gosh this really is a tough time at KT. I am sending good thoughts to your friend's son to stay safe and for your friend with heart problems. May he have a speedy recovery.
...See More
Sons friend drama.....
Q
Comments (8)
Maybe the son does not act like he does at school when he is at home. My step-sister's son (16) acts totally normal and adult-like when he is at home and around the family. I think that is the problem. My step-sister has kept him so sheltered that he has absolutely no clue how to make friends. He was born prematurely and had a lot of health issues early in his life. My step-sister would not let anyone near him to take care of him but herself and would take him to work with her in the hair salon where she worked everyday. He was raised around adults constantly. They lived outside of our school district for years using my dad and step-mother's address and would not let my nephew have any friends over nor tell them where he lived. He thinks that by acting the way he does and getting attention although negative is better than no attention at all (and he has confessed this to my son). I tried to talk to my step-mother about this a few months ago because as the boys get older and my nephew gets more obnoxious, the other boys are getting more cruel and he has absolutely no friends. It is getting out of control and happening more frequently. My step-mother tried to talk to my step-sister about what is going on and she talked to my nephew. My son told me that the next day he asked my son if he had told on him and then proceeded to act worse than ever. I guess that by getting the attention he is seeking that he continued to push the buttons more. I have told my son that he will not partake in this and if things go too far that he is to stand up for his cousin but my son says that he truly acts out and brings on most of the things that get done to him. I have now decided to stay out of it as by bringing more attention to it only makes it worse. My nephew is in counseling and hopefully she can get him to see that his behavior is not getting him the attention he truly wants. But I wonder sometimes how he will survive in life as he becomes an adult. He has absolutely no social skills when around his peers. I personally have found absolutely nothing positive on my part by sticking my nose in about my nephew. The main reason that I tried to help was that they were worried that my nephew was going to get hurt. I talked to my son who has assured me that he will not let things progress so far that he will get hurt but then explained to me that my nephew instigates a lot that he is not telling his mother the whole truth. I was hoping that by them confronting my nephew about his behavior that it would bring it to a halt but it only seemed to get worse so I just decided to let it go.
...See More
luckygardnr
15 years ago
Hugs for young Brad, and prayers that he will come through this surgery with just a temporary colostomy bag, and be pain free.
LorifromUtah
15 years ago
Brad will be in my thoughts as well.
What a rotten thing to happen!

Lori
hounds_x_two
15 years ago
I do remember, and I was thinking about him recently. I am so sorry about this upsetting news. Hopefully with appropriate treatment for an accurate diagnosis, he can avoid additional surgery. Poor kid! He will be in my prayers.
phyllis__mn
15 years ago
This must be so frustrating, to think one has good medical advice, and then to find out it was incorrect. It just makes me angry! Include me in on those wishing for a better life for young Brad.
ont_gal
15 years ago
this seems typical of a lot of the medical field these days Steph.
I feel for that lad...I have Crohns/ulcerative colitis..and its hell.
tami_ohio
15 years ago
I'll be sure to keep them in my thoughts.
lydia1959
15 years ago
Sending good thoughts his way.

I don't have a lot of faith in doctors anymore.
gwanny2three
15 years ago
This is really so sad. Something that should have been easliy diagnosed right away goes untreated. I just can't believe some of these doctors! My nephew almost lost his leg from a type of bone cancer a few years ago...another opinion saved it and he's cancer free today! Makes me wonder how many lives could have been saved from second and third opinions. I do hope Brad gets the proper treatment now and responds well. I'll say a prayer for him and keep him in my thoughts.
kayjones
15 years ago
I will definently send daily healing thoughts his way.
suebdoo
15 years ago
Lots of prayers to Brad and his family.

My dear friends son has Colitis (same age as Brad). He has had many, many surgeries and just had surgery to remove temporary colostomy. So far so good (knock wood).
Very hard for a 17 yr. old to deal with, however, if it will ease his suffering, he will adjust I'm sure.
Sometimes a temporary is all that's needed to give what's left the chance to heal.
gadgets
15 years ago
I have heard of miracles happening to people that the KT people have prayed for, so I will join others in their prayers for a full healing of Brad's body. Please keep us posted.

Shirley
waddles
15 years ago
I do remember the stories of Brad. I sure hope that the surgery goes well. My FIL has a colostomy and has had it for 30 years. I know it is an adjustment but he will learn to deal with it. FIL has done numerous sports with it and about the only think I have not seen him do is swim but he says he doesn't know how.
judy_jay
15 years ago
I remember Brad very well & am so sorry to hear about his wrong diagnosis. I'm adding special thoughts & prayers & hope his future surgery is successful.
caflowerluver
15 years ago
Sending Brad best wishes for a good recovery. I know how frustrating it can be to deal with the wrong diagnosis. My DS, who just turned 24, was born with several medical problems. He has gone through so many tests and hospital visits that he use to scream every time we drove by the hospital when he was young, afraid he was going in for more tests. And it hasn't stopped. He also was tested just last year for Crohns Disease and now is going to be checked to see if he has Colitis. You have to do all your own research and get more then one opinion. One doctor doesn't have all the answers I have found out.
Clare
angela_nor_calif
15 years ago
That's so sad. Poor kid. Sending good thoughts and prayers to him and his family.
naughtykitty
15 years ago
Wow, that really sucks. I sure hope that his intestine can be saved. he's way too young to live the rest of his life with a colostomy bag. My hopes and prayers go out to him and his family.
Mickey15
15 years ago
I've thought of Brad often and just figured no news was good news and he must be getting along fine. This makes me really angry. That poor kid has been through so much, and all those surgeries were un-necessary anyway?
I will keep him in my prayers Steph.
Hugs,
Tammy
maryanntx
15 years ago
This just makes me sick to think that he has gone through so much that was unnecessary and now his whole life will be changed. That's why I don't worry about my cancer. I was so fortunate to live 58 years in perfect health. I just can't imagine someone so young having to go through what Brad has gone through. If the rest of his intestines are removed will he be able to eat normally? My SIL had most of hers removed and now she gets most of her food intravenously.

Brad and his family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Happy_Go_Lucky_Gayle
15 years ago
So young to have such health issues. That is just awful.

Please know he will be in my prayers.

Gayle
marilyn_c
15 years ago
Poor guy. That is so very sad. That is an awful thing for someone so young to have to learn to deal with. I hope they can find some answers and his life will be better.
clubm
15 years ago
That's awful. Sending healing thoughts his way and for his parents.
teresava
15 years ago
Poor guy-He's already been through so much at such a young age it just doesn't seem fair that he has more pain ahead of him! Perhaps the correct diagnosis can help end his problems without a permanent bag.

I will certainly send him some good wishes and I'll remember to be thankful for my/my families good health right now!! We tend to take so much for granted.
irishdancersgram
15 years ago
Terrible! To be so young and to have these problems......Just today a dear friend told me 1 of her grandsons was diagnosed with Crohns....He's going into his 2nd yr. at college on a football scholarship and will probably have to give that up for now....
Keeping these young ones in my thoughts and prayers....
lydia1959
15 years ago
So sorry to hear this.

It may be too late for Brad to try the therapy in the link, but take a look at it. LDN is safe in the low doses prescribed, with very few if any side effects. According to this study it was very sucessfull in treating Crohn's patients. It's cheap too, so even if insurance wouldn't pay (since it would be an off-label use at this time) his family could easily afford it.

Sending good thoughts for Brad!!!

Here is a link that might be useful: LDN and Crohn's
evatx
15 years ago
I'm so sorry Brad and his family are having to go through this, especially due to misdiagnosis! My thoughts are with them.
jannie
15 years ago
Chrons disease is awful-my husband, his sister, and his late mother all have/had it. Prayers for Brad and his family.
summer_tx
15 years ago
What devastating news for Brad and his family and friends Steph. I sure hope the new docs decide they can save his small intestine. I would be having a VERY difficult time not getting right in the middle of his old doctor. So sad for such a young man to have had to suffer like this, and possibly needlessly. Prayers for Brad, absolutely!
brenda_in_tx
15 years ago
That is awful!! I can't believe his quack doctor did surgery on him and didn't know he had Crohns. My husband has Crohns and spent almost two weeks in the hospital this past January after having surgery. He's had it since '90. Brad needs to be under the care of a very good gastroenterologist - hopefully this new doctor can treat him or recommend someone. It's awful when they develop it at such a young age. Crohns is treatable but currently not curable.

Remember Brad, my friends son?

Comments (30)

Jodi_SoCal

vicki_lv_nv

Related Discussions

luckygardnr

LorifromUtah

hounds_x_two

phyllis__mn

ont_gal

tami_ohio

lydia1959

gwanny2three

kayjones

suebdoo

gadgets

waddles

judy_jay

caflowerluver

angela_nor_calif

naughtykitty

Mickey15

maryanntx

Happy_Go_Lucky_Gayle

marilyn_c

clubm

teresava

irishdancersgram

lydia1959

evatx

jannie

summer_tx

brenda_in_tx

COMPANY

BUSINESS SERVICES

GET HELP

CONNECT WITH US