There is something truly nasty about digging up garbage. You have my sympathy, indeed. It sounds that your heart is craving trees and your yard is saying 'I'm too wounded to respond just yet.' The real hassle, for me, is having to wait like Goldilocks until the soil is 'just right' for digging. And, when I do, it has all the appeal of sticky play doh. Yet I need to break the plough pan and compaction as cautiously as I can. Do you have some sort of iron pan or compaction layer that may be adding to your grief? A leftover from the Ice Age, perhaps? Field drains may be the long term answer when the bank balance is smiley again. My soil is definitely acid. It grows beautiful Bellis, Rumex, Cyperus and Juncus. It stays visibly wet for days after the last rain drop. Looking at your list of amendments - I don't think they're bulky enough to do you any good. I'm using bulk rough compost, horse manure (NOT steer because it's too silky. I'd use that on a hungry and sandy soil.) and as much green/brown roughly chopped mulch material as I can gather, scavenge, or scrounge. Even the remains of hay bales, corn straw... whatever is slow to break down and will keep the surface safe over winter and summer. On my soil (peat and podzol) it's safe to use shingle and sharp sand that's larger than 'builders' sand'. I know from experience I'll have to use gloves when I do a lot of weeding because there'll be an added abrasiveness in the soil. I think it's worth it, though. If those trees are 'gotta have' - plant on a serious mound and use clean soil. You might want to check out hugelkultur on YouTube, too. It could give you the drainage you're after. It's not orthodox backyard architecture, for sure - yet it could be an appropriate land-healing step to take in your situation. I'm still flirting with it at this point. If trees and shrubs are rot prone at present are there perennials you could use to make the upheaval look a lot more appealing? Iris ensata and pseudacorus come to mind as they are damp tolerant and would be fine in your zone. Acorus would also be worth a try. If you could keep it under control (mwahahaha!!!) you could try a patch of Ranunculus repens - so long as it's not a weed in your area. It has great roots for breaking through compacted clug. Blueberries on mounds could also be a foundation and dual-purpose planting - little feasts...:-)) Mimulus is also a possibility but it may only be annual for you. Might overwinter, if protected. In short - do find out whether your soil is acid-trending (pH5.5 and below), or concrete-forming alkaline (pH 9 and above). See if your local roadside maintenance people offer bulk mulch at reasonable rates and any local sawmills provide coarse untreated sawdust. Mix with horse manure and spread to at least four inches depth. Let it quietly rot. Remove any attempts by some shrubs to start wildly sprouting from the mulched pieces (willow and hydrangea come to mind). Stay OFF the ground after rain/snow - or install all weather paths or board-walks. It just won't take even the lightest compaction at this point. Check whether you're coping with some sort of hard pan zone below the surface. Rethink your garden design to cope with the reality of an undulating yard rather than a conventional smooth one. Good luck. And keep piling in the compost/mulch every year. It's worth doing.

I AM the one who is going to turn green (because of envy) What a beauties. Good photowork Lizalily! I've read about Maguire's Hippeastrum farm on Veronica Read's book. Yesterday i took a look on their website. I nearly began to hyperventilate :-)! Wow, and wow again! And they have indeed a clear preference for pink. That's my favourite colour too! Do you think they deliver to Europe too? I HAVE to ask them sometime. I really hope they can send hippies to Europe. Otherwise, i think i'm moving to Australia! Liza, keep us updated on your Aussie hippies. We want more!

It's been a while, FlyingFlower, but I found it a fascinating glimpse into another world. It's in my bookcase, and I'll read it and enjoy it again some day. But not particularly for decorating help. The world that existed for her was one in which "people" shared their homes with a bunch of underlings. She treated hallways as semipublic corridors, decorating them in a very basic and impersonal way, and virtually all rooms, of course, had doors that could be and were closed against them. Very interestingly for wealthy people who could afford almost everything, almost everything was excluded under the classic style she helped define. The acceptable colors and furniture styles were severely straightjacketed (and have mercifully since been blasted wide open). I don't really remember, but I think she considered only 3 specific colors acceptable for staircase walls. Her guidelines for developing a classic architecture are just as explicit and apparently what made this book a classic, but by the standard she sets the architecture and proportions of my rooms doom them to failure before even starting. For instance of many features "undistinguishing" my hovel, the ceiling of my 17' wide living room falls desperately short of a workable 17' or so at a cavelike 9'. Good book, though. :)

Sunnysmom, I did do all the categories a year and a half ago. My mindset is ever changing though and it kind of goes back to what was said earlier in the thread about other people and life in general causing distractions in the process. You did give me some things to think about- namely, what if she doesn't want something early on, should I keep it/store it for her for a later date? I just don't know. The example that was in my mind when I wrote the last post was DH's grandmother's china. Having something like that when we were first married would have been amazing as it was something we could not have afforded at that point and would have been cherished. It came to us after her passing, and after we had been married for 20+ years. While we're touched and cherish it, we don't use it because our habits were well set by that point (we've never owned fine china, and still don't use grandma's even when we host). It's beautiful and in mint condition, but what if DD doesn't want that as she establishes her household? That's an item we would definitely keep, even if we don't use it--- but what about other items? In thinking about it, I guess I don't have a good criteria for heirloom type items that we don't use, but aren't really replaceable if they are something DD eventually wants. Nannygoat, I can share my experience with letters on the chance it helps you. When I did the first purge more than a year ago, I sorted through cards and letters. It was pretty clear which ones were keepers and which ones weren't much of anything. I looked for things that contained clear sentiment, nice words, and made me feel good when I read them- nothing that was just signed (unless the card was particularly meaningful in some way), and no notes/letters than made me feel blah. That left just a small pile of cards/letters, mostly from good friends from my 20s, and deceased relatives. They went in a bag, in a drawer for safe keeping. A year later, I pulled them out and started going through them again- at that point, the realization hit me that there was almost no contact with any of those people and the notes felt like distant echos, rather than any sort of valid sentiment- because that's kind of what they were at that point. I got rid of most all of them, even the ones from deceased relatives, because again, after a year, there was nothing new there, nothing validating, just an old sentiment from a long time ago, kind of like a ghost. Time and revisiting them helped me realize that I was not getting anything out of them, even though they might seem special from a quick surface glance. My advice is be patient with them and yourself, be discriminating where you can be, and also be open to how your feelings might (or might not) change in time.