This is the classic damage that happens to children from divorce. This is why its so important for parents to EXPLAIN TO KIDS why things are happening. kids tend to blame themselves for everything around them because at their age they cannot grasp reality and societies ways of life. Thank God my husband always explains to his kids. WHy he left their mother, why he cannot go back with her. He always explains. There is alot of facts missing from your explaination. There are many reasons a father could have left. One usual reason is the deep seeded hate for the ex wife. And the exwife causing him grief. She may have put a restraining order on him. He couldnt' stand seeing her while picking up and dropping of his daughter. Second. the amount of child support was so heavy he needed to get a better job to support his daughter. If that was so, they yes, he would leave the support for teh benefit of his daughter. Third, he may have been depressed. I know my husband was depressed because he felt at the time of the divorce, being a failure as a husband and a father. He felt he couldnt' fix the situation and left for the benefit of his kids. But he didn't leave the province or state. But he still left and his kids did blame themselves for a while. What this man did wrong was that he did not explain to his daughter that he is leaving not because of her. He needs to leave for _______explaination. It should have been given to your friend. That way she would not have this complex of selfblame, less worth and so. ITs so IMPORTANT. Unfortunately, the damage is done. But i honestly think, she should meet with her dad and confront him with her feelings. Tell him off the bat that she doesnt want to lose the relationship she has with him BUT she has long lingering questions and feelings of the past. She is an adult and has the right for answers. He will speak with her because she is not a child anymore. i have to be honest. What i've noticed is that men just dont seem to see the same things woman do. My father also moved on and doesnt' speak anymore to us since he remarried. He speaks with me on the phone and now is trying to have a relationship. I've been invited this weekend to his house. I know whatever didn't happen in the past is long gone. He was never much of a father to me. I had alot of resentment and hate for him. Felt neglected, not good enough. But overcame it by delving into my environment and friends and talking my feelings out. But what helped me the most was my confrontation with him. It was heated and loud and alot of emotions poured out. But that helped me. Screaming at him and telling him he wasnt' there for me while i grew up helped me. I felt a closure of somesort. And from that point i moved on with my life. i finally married and have a child ofmy own. Your friend needs to speak with her dad. She must on this, or she will never get over her feelings. Regardless of how much counseling is done.

JJ and Lily, I move roses around like they were furniture in a living room. Here is my best experiences. First, when possible, I move them as soon as the dirt is thawed enough to be dug in the spring when they are dormant. Dig the destination holes first. Next, dig a large area around the roots to take as much root with you as possible AND, take as much dirt as possible. I use 2 shovels and place the rose between them before I lift them out. Sort of like a shovel/rose sandwich. Then I place them in their new hole and add water and fill in with dirt. Most often they don’t even know they have been moved. To do it later in the season is tricky. I did it last year. I used old sheets on copper pipe trellises in front of the roses and made sure I watered twice a day. It was 90-100 degrees. I moved 4 of them,and 3 of them were little. The 3 little ones did great. The jury is still out on the larger rose. It’s canes stayed green, but it didn’t grow leaves afterwards, so I’ll find out if it’s alive this spring. Believe it or not, I am going to be moving 3 of those 4 roses again this spring... it’s just the way I do. :) If you like the location, JJ, I would give them another year. Use a good fertilizer (I use Osmocote 1/4 cup per plant early in the spring) and water them well during the season. See if that doesn’t make a difference. Rebecca

Thank you all! Your feedback has been helpful. I can't move the front door or the bedroom door, so I'm left with moving the fireplace either to the left or into the corner. If it goes to the left it is actually more centered in the room even though it's not centered on the wall. chispaThe TV is going above the FP sheadsheadThe FP is a non-negotiable so trying to figure out the best way to make it work. Mark Bischak, ArchitectThis is what I'm thinking furniture wise if we move the FP to the left. I think it could work. Any thoughts on this layout?

Thanks for the input everyone! We finally started the reno, sorry my “before pictures” were lacking… The kitchen was a little box closed off from the rest of the house so we opened it up! We removed the wall the refrigerator and stove were on, and removed the wall with cutout to the “dining area”. We also removed the sliding glass door and replaced it with an awning window where there will be a counter on the patio on the other side. We’re about one week out from having a functioning kitchen and about a month out (due to holidays) to have a complete kitchen. I also want to encourage anyone who wants to do an reno/remodel but is procrastinating because they’re intimidated by the process to find a local cabinet store and meet with a designer. JUST DO IT! Even with an incomplete non functioning kitchen we LOVE IT already!