FYI; if you forgo using an oil-based SS cleaner/polish on the DW (if you opt to get one in SS), you will find the surface much easier to clean and keep clean. Stubborn or sticky stains can be removed (easily) using BKF (Barkeeper's Friend)--the powdered version, with a wet sponge or gentle (no scratch) scrub sponge. That's how I removed a residual mustard "stain" from my friend's brand-new SS DW (Electrolux). For normal cleaning (full or spot), I use alcohol & water spray mixed with some essential lavender oil (lavender has natural anti-bac properties, might improve surface tension of the mixture-?, and smells nice!). Spray, wipe dry with a micro-fiber cloth. That's all it usually needs. For stubborn marks, I'll use a small sprinkle of BKF. Our Miele DW is paneled, but our other appliances (range, fridge, MW) are SS, and they still look great after 6 +/- yrs of use.

johnliu, You ask so many detailed questions that, instead of attempting to answer them in detail, I'll cut to the bottom line and go all prescriptive on you. The Word -- you will see it elsewhere as well as here -- is that there are really only two kinds of dishwashers: (1) Miele, and (2) all others. Not totally credulous, we accepted the Word provisionally, bought a Miele, and found out that the Word is true. There are many reasons why no one who ever has had a Miele dishwasher would ever voluntarily have any other kind, but one of the least mentioned is build quality. Mieles are significantly heavier than the competition because they use more stainless steel in places where other manufacturers use plastic, and because Miele uses a heavier gauge of stainless steel than the competition. All dishwashers need to be leveled; with most, you make a good guess before sliding the dishwasher under the counter; with the Mieles, there are worm screws on the front of the machine that allow you to adjust the rear feet AFTER the dishwasher is under the counter. And then there is the top flatware rack, which is highly addictive. We, too, live in Portland, Oregon, with its extremely soft water. After issues with glassware etching when we used ANY "supermarket" dishwasher powder in our previous dishwasher, we switched to Ecover (powder, not tablets) even before we bought the Miele. The dishes get just as clean, and the etching problem simply disappeared. Mieles, which use a very small quantity of water per load, also require rinse aids to work properly; we use Cascade Crystal Clear, and it works just fine.

For me it is simple, while I appreciate many granites and some ss appliances, they are not for everyone. I also find many granites to be downright ugly and many ss appliances to be boring looking (hard to distinguish from all the others I have seen that day). I think the best plan is to figure out what you like by having an open mind. Shopping out your options and getting what works for your home, family and budget. What I have heard repeatedly on this thread that just because the masses think that granite and ss are "musts" that one should follow their own instincts and not worry that you are not part of the trend. We got 3 ss elements in our kitchen (hood, wall oven and micro shelf), 4 in white (fridge, freezer, micro and range) and a black dw. No one can accuse us of following the herd. Each one was chosen on its merits. If we had found a perfect granite, we might have gotten that, but over time, I think we came to the conclusion that it would not work with the vintage homey vibe we were shooting for. It was not for lack of trying though. We met with fabricators and walked miles in granite yards trying to pick one if it hit us right AND worked in our space. We saw many that were lovely but were not the right color scheme or look for this particular kitchen. I think if people don't consider their options, then they will have a limited kitchen (and life). We ended up with Corian counters which I would have bet heavily against going into the project. An open mind and patience led us to our right choices. Others will find their own answers, but hopefully not look down on kitchens that don't have ss or granite. Luckily, we have GW where we can read about others' experiences, see their choices and learn about more options. I'd know so much less if I had not practically lived here for a few years, lol!

Thanks to everyone who took the time to respond and give me good advice. You pretty much confirmed that what we are doing is right--just "being there," keeping things light, not making a big deal out of this to DSS. KKNY, you don't know me, yet you read the worst into what I said, in the meantime, ignoring all of the clearly positive aspects of it. Perhaps I should read the worst into your post to point out that you did nothing more than take an opportunity to further what appears to be your "mission" to attack the SMs here. If you really wanted to help, as a BM, you could offer some constructive advice. But if you did that, you might actually help IMPROVE a step situation, which would REALLY run counter to your "mission," now wouldn't it?? For your information, and for anyone else who is wondering, I made the point that they are not "good enough" to make their middle school team (yes, they had try-outs and DID NOT make it) to show that this "team" they are on is just a step above "pick-up basketball" in the neighborhood. It is something they do for fun and exercise, but b-ball is not a sport that either of them particularly excel at, nor is this league something that is that important to them vs. time with their father, which they need, NOW MORE THAN EVER, IMO. It would be like DH telling them he can't do visitation one weekend b/c he has a church league b-ball game. If DH has to miss visitation for work (which almost never happens, as even though DH is a lawyer and works MANY hours a week, he puts in extra hours during the week so he can take off the weekends and be with DSSs), or if DSSs have to miss for school, church or some other activity that is really important to them, that is another matter. And this is not MY original sentiment--I am actually parroting what DH says, and HE certainly is allowed to make statements w/o having bad motives ascribed, ISN"T HE, KKNY??? The point I was trying to make is, there are some activities that really "justify" missing visitation, and others do not and are an "excuse" which is a symptom of a problem. If we suddenly agree to skip visitation everytime there is something going on that one of them could possibly do, we might as well tell them to "have a nice life" as I suggested above. I probably should have mentioned that DSSs have played in this league for years and have NEVER had a problem missing Sat. games for visitation, so it seems obvious it was an "excuse" this year. Also, they both are VERY VERY good at other things, and we support them. DSS 14's soccer team went to the state championships last year. DSS 12 has only lost a few wrestling matches IN HIS LIFE! So, when it comes to soccer and wrestling, we understand that they can't miss and work around those things. Someone mentioned "walking on eggshells" around SKs. That is the real irony of KKNY ascribing bad motives to me. For 9 years, I have gone out of my way to try not to say anything that would be upsetting to DSSs. When they do things that I would correct my son on in a minute (like eat chocolate chip cookies, brownies, etc. dropping crumbs all over the kitchen instead of over the counter, pouring a large glass of the last milk we have in the house so that there is none for anyone else) I do not say ONE WORD. I remind myself that I am glad they like my cookies, and I'm glad their drink of choice is MILK over soda. Of course, I would think nothing of telling DS 6 not to do that or anything else. But I don't want to do anything to make them feel "picked on" at our house. So it is almost LAUGHABLE to me that someone here would say I made a "dig" at DSS 14 over not being good enough to make the middle school team. Also, I feel badly for DH b/c he is truly one of the best dads one could imagine. Someone asked that recently on another thread. My DH is a wonderful DH and an amazing dad. When DSSs were little guys, he bathed them, dressed them, complete care. (He bathes our 2, does diaper changes, etc.) DSS 14 plays guitar and when his band played for his school recently, DH took the morning off work to be there. (4+ hours round trip for a 15 minute assembly, but again, he loved every minute of it.) He also takes DSSs INDIVIDUALLY on father-son weekends each summer. (For past 3 years, DSS 12 and he have gone to father-son wrestling camp; DSS 14 and he have been to father-son baseball camp and pro football Hall of fame.) DH loves to laugh and has a very witty sense of humor and always keeps things light. I just read this response to DH in its entirety and he agrees with everything I've said. I think I'm going to end this with the sentiment that the fact that DH and I are on the same page and have a STRONG, HEALTHY, HAPPY marriage will get us through this. Thanks again for all who posted on this. Have a good day.