Keep posting, Breezy! I enjoy your posts, as I enjoy ALMOST every point of view! :)
You're so right though, seems there are a lot of us in the "backsplash" phase! I'm in no hurry to put BS in, so I'm just waiting everyone out, so I can see what I like best! LOL
Especially since there are about 3-4 with the same granite as me! (TB) :)

If people are seeking opinions, then give your opinion. The people who ask for advice don't necessarily keep track of all the personalities on here, so it isn't like they already know what you're going to say (even if I do ;-)).

No, breezygirl, do not quit posting! Your ideas are valuable....someone might be asking a question and not read your thoughts in other posts. If they don't like them, they don't have to use them. I, for one, completely agree with you. I don't like to see the counter and BS competing for attention....make one or the other a focal point....but do not quit posting~~

No, don't shut up. And I'm not just saying that b/c I completely agree with what you are saying about BSs. Why shouldn't you share your opinion to those who are specifically asking? An opinion doesn't have the power to push people. People may feel more compelled to go with a person's suggestions if a lot of people are saying the same thing *OR* even just what one person says if what they are saying makes perfect sense. But isn't that why they asked for opinions in the first place? Carry on :).

Breezy- I agree with the others. Keep posting. Your opinion is valuable and even if others don't agree, if they are seeking your opinion, give it. I tend to agree that the backsplash or the counter can be busy, not both. I think it is wise to warn people of this even if they end up going a different direction.

and, wow...that sundae sounds delicious...the one with just brownies and vanilla of course!

I don't mean quit posting in general! You can't get rid of me that easily. ;)

I just don't want to sound like a broken record regarding tile and irritate any daily posters who read those same comments from me over and over. You all just made a good point about those seeking input not necessarily paying attention to how many times the same advice is given by the same people.

LOL at your strategy, Sand!

No, don't hold back. You're pretty thoughtful about why you feel something does or doesn't work with the other elements in someone's kitchen.

There is a groupthink that gets going sometimes pressuring posters into the most boring backsplashes imaginable. I practically had to swing a stick to keep the crowds off of trinity20, who ended up with a stunning BS (if I do say so myself) but was almost doubtmongered into a kitchen with all the personality of a dial tone. "You'll tire of the pattern, go neutral." Why on earth would someone think it's impossible to tire of a neutral? In fact, almost all of the threads recently from people unhappy about their backsplashes are those who felt pressured--IRL, not just here--to pick neutral choices at every turn. Neutral is just as hard as colorful or patterned to get right, since lots of people screw up the undertones.

The key is what seems to work for a particular space. There is no one right answer. Although, I must confess, it eludes me why people spend significant amounts of money just to get more beige into their kitchens.

Marcolo- LOL!

Shut Up? Are you #$%*@ kidding me here?! Never. Keep on posting. Opinions are just that, take it or not, but weigh in on the many different options. After all, the end result will be YOUR kitchen. I for one, value the advice here. OT, can you give your opinion on my over the sink lighting issue? But now I'm hungry with your food analogy.

sandesurf, I agree. There are a lot of BS posts because it is so painful.

Breezy,

I am much in the same boat as you. So often someone asking for help with a BS has a lovely, but somewhat busy, counter and is considering a BS that I think is going to compete with it for attention. I, too, have many times commented about letting the counter be the star. To me, if you want a busy BS, then the counter should be more subdued. That does not mean I think everything should be neutral! And, Marcolo, I did follow the thread for trinity's BS, and I certainly agree that what you suggested there really worked and brought everything together. But his counter was not at all busy and so the BS became the star. That is not the case with most of the posters wanting help with the BS.

I like it when you comment that way about BS's because it means I don't have to.
I too like a clean line, somewhere for the eye to rest, aesthetic and if I see that a poster wants something else, I make a quick comment and then I bow out of the conversation. Who am I to say that what he/she wants is wrong but I have been thinking about just not saying anything.

Oh my my my my my my -- breezy I've been meaning all day, trying to get online to respond to your post on my thread about a BS where you mentioned feeling badly about stating your opinion which was to be more, well, standard. (My extant options are both pretty neutral, for me it's just a question of whether more or less neutral in the face of a fairly happening stone).

Yet again on my way to your post I got sidetracked, this time to a larger version of same from you. So I have to ask you -- as you yourself would put it, with all love -- but I have to ask you: why are you so insecure about stating your opinions at this particular moment?

Because I know you know what I was going to say, which is basically what everyone else has said above. We're all big people here; we post to get an opinion. If we don't like what we hear and didn't actually want to hear what we don't like, then we shouldn't have been posting in the first place. And more specifically, I wanted to assure you that I personally, wasn't posting looking solely for reassurance with my choice. Maybe you need to hear that: I wasn't. I'll put it in that specific thread.

But now, I have to turn the tables on you: what's going on that you're suddenly so nervous about expressing your opinion? On the forum's score, it's what the forum is here for, so I can't imagine you're transgressing in that regard.

On your own front, however ... I have to ask: who's giving you a hard time about your choices??? Is the jerky fireplace contractor back? Your former GC? Something especially going wrong? Whassup?

Because assuming the best, I'm fairly certain you're not just wanting to hear a chorus of "please post breezy"! You've got it anyway, whether you wanted it or not. But the real question is, why are you thinking that suddenly your opinions are offtrack? Hmmm.... I remember you wondering whether your kitchen was going to be individual-enough ... is that it? Are you back to wondering whether your tendency to separate out flavors will result in too many distinct, bland flavors?

If so, then that's not what's going on here either, at least not from what you said. Because you're referencing people's issues with way-happening stone vs bland bs. You're arguing for, basically, averaging out movement overall, if you will. That's different from dulling it down; that's creating space for noisiness to be heard.

Anyway, enough of the random pop-psychologizing here. But I do want you to hear that everyone here ought to be able to handle your or anyone else's opinion, expressed, as this is the purpose of asking for it. At least, when it's asked for that is -- which it is in these instances for sure!

YESSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Nah, what makes you anymore (or less for that matter) irritating than the rest of us? I don't share your aesthetic but that doesn't mean your taste isn't more closely aligned with an OP. At least your bias is clear and that can be the hardest part of deciphering on-line advice.

Definitely keep posting, even if you feel like a broken record! You state your opinions in the nicest way, with a clear caveat about your own personal taste (which seems similar to mine so I always appreciate your thoughts!). I think there are a lot of people out there like me who can find individual elements that they like but aren't good at knowing how/if they will work with everything else. I know I'm having this issue with my backsplash, and your advice to let one element be the star really resonated with me! So, thanks!

Now I need to eat brownies. Dang it.

:o)

It's funny, I looked back at my request for backsplash help, the one where several members recommended that I make it simpler than I was considering -- but yours was NOT one of them!

I think it's great that you give your opinions freely. That's what we post questions for -- or requests for help -- so we can get differing viewpoints, and maybe see something that didn't occur to us. I appreciate all viewpoints -- I really don't post a request for opinions just to have my own opinion ratified -- I want to make sure I didn't overlook something. And maybe I will come up with a better result because of all the input I have gotten from GW.

BTW, I'm still in a quandary about which tile backsplash to put with my busy Typhoon Bordeaux granite. All opinions welcome!

Breezy,
I appreciated your statements back at the beginning of my kitchen remodel (This was month's ago, and on someone else's post). It put me in the right frame of mind because before that, I did not know which direction to head with my granite and it was all a little overwhelming. So, 6 months down the road, when I (and everyone else working on their kitchens right now) am sitting back admiring my beautiful room, there will be some other novice just starting the process . . . and they will need the same advice. So keep on posting! And, Thank you!

Please keep posting! And do post about what YOU are considering. (Carrara marble with silgranit grey sinks here too...dreading and postponing BS decision.) I value your opinion!

I gotta go with the majority on this one. Your opinions are valuable and needed. People say I like this, I don't like that, but not everyone explains why. The explanation is what helps the most because it can get people thinking in new directions.

Hey Kido, we're all learning here. Each time I read one of your post I hear thoughtfulness. That's what it's about - to keep thinking. Maybe this kitchen thing is a metaphor of our lives.

You should post your opinions, but it is plain evil to reference brownies with ice cream, sauce, nuts, etc... at this time of the month (and after 11pm at night when I am reading it!).

I think as long as you don't get too "Groutchy", Keep posting away Breezeygirl.

Anomous

don't shut up ...but i demand pics. now.

xxo,
kate

"No, don't shut up. And I'm not just saying that b/c I completely agree with what you are saying about BSs."

i agree with this (easier than typing it all again).

the eyeballs need a rest! maybe because mine are getting old - they need a 'bench' to rest on.

I do think one should decide when picking counter top out which way they are going... if the BS is what you've picked out first and it's the love of your life, your life source etc and it's the busy one then pick a more mellow counter top.
My mind goes to plaids with flowers (shame on you for using brownies, chocolate, nuts, etc!). wearing a loud flowery top with a well defined colorful plaid skirt... even if they each have a color that matches... will send the eyeballs into a never ending spin!

you can add color or accent tiles into a BS with a busy counter top tho. just keep it simple. 3 different accent tiles etc would probably be too much.

ok, I'd better shut up. I do have to say tho that there have been very few ending combos that sent my eyeballs spinning. A few that were in the running did tho - lol!

OTOH - if in the end you like 'loud flowers with loud colorful plaid' - then do it! it's your kitchen and I won't be visiting it. I always think tho that when it's 'your' kitchen you sometimes are just too 'close' to it to see from the 'distance'. I've done that so many times and later think 'what in the world was I thinking? why didn't someone say something to me?' (not with a BS as I've never had one but with an outfit or a new piece of furniture that instantly declares war on the drapes.)

Aliris is correct that I didn't post this to get a cheerleading squad telling me to keep posting. I just wanted to hear that I'm not working on everyone's last nerve with my tile comments. Also, I am not familiar with online forum etiquette. I've been here more than 18 months, but this is the first forum in which I've ever really participated. I'm still learning the rules. For instance, I didn't know that bumping a thread is bad manners for other forums. I wondered if my incessant tile comments were breaking a rule somehow and no one told me.

phoggie, regina, briana, vitamins, blfenton--nice to hear I'm not the only "simple is usually better" opinion.

Marcolo--I only observed Trinity's thread because my first instinct would not have been to go in the direction you choose. I kept my mouth shut since he was getting so much help already. Your suggestion worked very well, but I never would have come up with that myself.

Celtin--I'll take a look since you asked.

Blfenton--You hit the nail on the head, as usual, with my thinking. "Who am I to say that what he/she wants is wrong." Sometimes posters seem so tied to a choice that I hesitate to say I don't like it.

Aliris--You're reading too much into this. Mr. Fireplace Jerk isn't back and nothing is going spectacularly wrong. Just the usual headaches of being a first time GC with a big project I'm struggling to keep my arms around.

Cary--I'm glad I'm not more annoying than anyone else. ;)

Erin--You're welcome.

Adrienne--Now I need to MAKE brownies!

Redhead--I think your post came along when I felt I was repeating myself too much. Ya know I woulda said it.

Mellie--You're welcome, although I honestly don't remember what I said.

Ca_mom--No idea what I'm considering for tile. I've daydreamed a few times when I felt like I could spare an hour to look at tile online. Need to get the drywall up first in the house before I can even think of tile.

Kode and Enduring--Thanks.

Dianalo--I guess it was bound to be the "time of the month" for someone around here. ;)

Gary--I try to only get grouchy with myself on my threads. Nice to see you over in Kitchens!

Kate--Pics? Pics of what? The broken toilet was moved out of the living room and most of the new plywood floor underlayment is down, but I've still got bare studs and no working plumbing. Wanna see the rat droppings from under the house? ;) Enjoy the tropical sun down there and relax. I'm sooo looking forward to YOUR pics.

Now that I know I'm not unknowingly breaking some rule or irritating you with my repitition, let's drop the subject.

Steph--We were posting at the same time. Love the eyeballs resting on a bench description! I'm going to use that.

Have we had a recent thread on theories and advice behind choosing tile and counters? Your post is a good one for someone just starting to pick major surfaces. That would be a good discussion.

of course not.
it is the varied opinions as well as the reasons why that help make this forum so enlightening
you also say ... I just don't want to sound like a broken record regarding tile and irritate any daily posters who read those same comments from me over and over.
My answer to that is that there are some like myself who read a lot just for the fun of it now and those who may be reading for the first time. For those they do not know what you have said before and are not going to read all the posts

My disclaimer is that I totally disagreed with everything you speak of when I chose my backsplash & counter
in fact I chose the BS before the counter and although they are both "busy" the overall effect is not

yet i do hear what you say and love seeing examples

No way, breezygirl! In fact, I am broken-hearted that you didn't chime in on my backsplash question, although I guess that's what I get for not choosing a busy granite! :)

Seriously, though -- as others have said, I think the variation of opinions is what makes this Forum such a great resource, and I have never read a post of yours that was less than considerate or polite, whether stating an opinion contrary to the general consensus, or otherwise.

Here is a link that might be useful: My Backsplash Question

Muspic--Good point about someone new not knowing that I say the same thing over and over. :)

Jgs--I saw your post but didn't have a specific suggestion. I'll take another look.