I would probably not worry about it. They are not necessarily wearing no seatbelts. They could be doubling up which isnt ideal but it works. But, more than that... she gets the kids so few and far between that at least she saw the kids. If your really really concerned I would suggest to her that she can go to any junk yard and pull out a set of seat belts and bolt them in... it is a fairly easy process.

I know that bm has not seen the kids in forever. But what would possess her to pick them up when she has a child at home so sick she is thinking of bringing them to the hospital? Sounds selfish to me. And now the flu bug is in your home for everyone to catch. I would be a little peeved.

The seatbelt thing may seem minor but it would bother me too. If bm was to get pulled over she would get a ticket. I am a little evil, but I would be tempted to call the police and say I am driving next to a vehicle that has way too many kids in back and give the location and plates. $75 later bm may be more concerned with her kids safety.

Doubling up does NOT work. In the event of an accident one or both could be badly injured.

I agree - doubling up is not safe, nor it is legal. Allowing it send the message to the kids that they don't have to follow the rules, and that they don't have to do what it best for their safety. If mommy dearest can't fit all her offspring into one car than she needs to make other arrangements.

And I have to second that it was crappy to finally take the kids only to bring them over to get sick and share it with you all. Happy frickin' holidays.

JNM,
I was totally thinking what you said. Her other kid was already sick Thurs when she called to make plans obviously. Why make plans and expose her other 3 to the sickness that was so bad she was considering taking her child to the hospital?

And the seatbelt thing really bothers me. There was no need for her and bf to drop the kids off and put them unsafely in the vehicle. Not to mention that middle sd was sick and she squished her in a spot next to her little brother.

BM just never stops amazing me with her stupidity.

doubling up works fine. I did it for quite some time before I had the money to add in an extra seat belt in my car and used that for much longer until we had the money for a car with enough seats for everyone... sometimes you just have to do what you have to do.

I think it is splitting hairs to make a big fuss over breaking the rules and setting a bad example over the seatbelt ordeal. As I said she takes the kids so few and far between that it would just seem like you are trying to find a reason for her to not be able to. If it really bothers then suggest the junk yard seat belt ... anything else including calling the police is just petty and vindictive and definately not doing what is best for the kids.

Let me just clarify here... I think BM is crap and yes it is incredibly stupid to drag more kids along with a sick child... and yes it was not necessary to bring bf along with her. But, I think I can safely assume that this is not the first time that it was known that she has a mini van that holds 7 and by simple math any time she has ever had the kids ... there were to many people. To split hairs over something that is A) not really new news and B) is really only an issue what like once a month or so when she does show up ... is just not worth it. Yes it sucks and I know that it is uber aggravating to have one more why is she such a moron thing to add to the list. But, really it is just one more thing to add to the list.

Besides the obvious stupidity of spreading the flu bug through your home....The seatbelt thing would have me hot. In my state it is $101 fine. Seatbelts are not accesories they are safety features, required by law to be worn. I would have DH call BM and ask how she decides which child is important enough to keep safe and which one it would be okay to have fly through the windshield in case of an accident. If BM can't provide safe transportation, I'd provide all transportation. Yes, a pain but better than the alternative.

I would be outraged. Yes, I rode without a seat belt as a child and didn't die. We had no car seats either. I also rode in the back of pickups.

But my car doesn't move unless everyone is buckled in. Unless it were an emergency there is no excuse. She had an adult to watch the other kids.

And the illness factor is frustrating too!! What a complete lack of regard for the health and safety of everyone involved. Not to be crass, but a child/person without a seat belt becomes a projectile and can injure the rest of the passengers as well.