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New to Forum...but have a question...

21 years ago

Hi..I am new to this forum, but have a question dealing with my ex. He and I are headed back to court because he is wanting more visitation with the children. He currently has them a couple of nights a week. He thinks he should have more days because he just wants them. However, he doesn't even use the days he has now because he is always dropping the children off early or not picking them up at all. I just want to know if any of you have had an experience like this with your ex? If so, how did you go about getting it taken care of in a reasonable manner? I really don't want to go back to court, but will if it comes to that. Any prayers that can be spared would also be appreciated. Thanks

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Comments (4)

tootsiexyz
21 years ago
What if the x wont go away?
Amethyst_OR
21 years ago
start keeping a log (out of the kiddies eyes of course) of all the times he shows up and when he is supposed to show up. That way you can present to the court how irresponsible he is with his current allotted time. Make an offer, if he start being more responsible with showing up when he is supposed to, then you will work in more time.

Maybe the current schedule conflicts with work, have you talked to him about switching days (but without adding more time)

If he doesn't realize the impact it makes on the kids when he doesn't show up, I hope no court will give him extra days to disappoint them
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LadyBug4567
Original Author
21 years ago
New twist on things...I have learned that he is filing for full custody. FULL CUSTODY..why...because he thinks that he and that woman he is sleeping with can give them a better life. What is wrong with the life I am giving them? I have a very good job, a beautiful home, a wonderful man in my life, a marriage on the way and he wants to F**K that up. It is all because I won't give in to more visitation days. I think the real reason he wants more days has to do with child support. He pays a butt load right now and resents every penny. I did't ask for any, but the court entered an order and so his check got garnished. He should help raise these children. If he gets more days the amount of his child support goes down. However, my lawyer said that unless the days significantly increase than the child support order will not change. I just don't understand why he is doing this? Is it my upcoming marriage? Is it that he just wants to maintain the control over me that he had while we were married and doesn't like the fact that I am not willing to give him that? I just hate the ()&^&%^(& right now.

Thanks for the vent.....AAAGGGHHH
Jerri
21 years ago
Well one thing I am sure of: courts are not willing to change children's situations without a pretty darn good reason. Possession is still 9/10th of the law, particularly with child custody. So I don't think you have any worry there.

Since he intends to take this to court you need to get a lawyer who will request that he pay court costs. At least shoot for that.

It is wise for every custodial parent to keep a thorough journal of pick-up and drop-off time of the visitation, complete with what was set by the court vs. what is actually happening. I wish you had one for at least the past year. Start now and add as much from the past as you can remember.

don't worry about it too much. Just get a good lawyer and let them do their job. Want doesn't mean get, ex is going to learn that the hard way.
j

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