I never saw yesterdays show and only saw todays because I was zipping through channels and saw that he was talking about the mom and babies. Did anyone else see in the audience, I am sure it was Kate from the Jon and Kate show, was it? I don't know what they talked about yesterday or who they had on the show. But todays they had this women who helps big 5 star people and where people talked about the hotel she moved into it, it wasn't, it was a rental because the mom and this lady was having death threats which they took seriously and she was only there with her other children for 3 days and they are back home now. The picture of this spacious living room that was shown in some magazine was a friend's house who let her have the pictures taken there. The house that her parents own and she lives in with the kids are only two bedrooms and its wall to wall cribs. Also they talked to the dad and he told Dr. Phil that he and her parents went to the doctor to tell him not to do it and he said he wouldn't but he sure did as 8 babies later, here they are. According to another doctor, Dr. Phil had on the show said that this doctor had two law suits against him, one was dropped. And Dr. Phil asked this doctor that does plastic surgery could he tell by looking at the pictures of this mom if she had it done and he said yes her nose, possibly chin, lips. Another one of the doctors said that when you are pregnant and have eclampsy,etc. that your body swells up so alot of the before picture could be the reason that the face shifted and looks different. He said yes, that is true but he looked at a picture of her high school picture and said she did have touches done. Dr. Phil said if she did have those done what would be the cost of them? $20,000.00. That means the money to used for her babies she has been using for her own good. Yes, I feel that those babies need protecting plus her other children and that someone else has to be in control of the money to only be used for their needs, not the mom's. She gets nothing and that is the way it should be. They also said that there will be tons of watching those babies and kids to make sure they are well looked after and not abused. Dr. Phil said the mom's church is rallying together people to help them out when the babies come home. Can you imagine two bedroom house and its already wall to wall cribs, where is it all going? More cribs, bottles, formula, diapers, all the things needed to care for babies. This lady said that they can get her help to rent a house,etc. as its cheaper for them to have her keep the kids then put them into foster homes. I hope they are there all the time watching this mom that she is caring for those babies. The big question was, was she caring for the kids she already has herself?

Hecalls and Cawfe are correct, oh my, she didn't have full custody, they had 50/50 but she spent six months fighting for full custody just before she left. I think cawfe summed it up best. She won't take or return SD's calls, except when it's convenient for 'her'. She has called after SD is asleep, then says we're 'keeping her baby from her' because DH won't wake up SD to talk. Whenever she has SD with her, all she talks about is her 'butterfly' wedding that she's planning with BF and they are all lovey dovey so SD ends up feeling like she's not so important to her mom. Mom left and forgot about me. SD has told DH that she feels BF stole her mom. It was the way in which it was done. She sent SD on her regular week to DH and moved during the week while we had SD. Then, the day she was supposed to get SD back, she tells DH 'I can't take her, I've moved. I met Mr. Wonderful and we're getting married. Can you tell DD?' He said 'you tell her yourself' so they agreed that BM would tell her and DH would be there. BM sits down both her girls and tells them, not only is she moving three hours away and leaving SD with dad, but she also tells them that she's marrying this guy (whom they have known for two weeks) and another significant thing to note here, she had a different BF just a month earlier that she told SD she was getting married to, but she went on a trip out of state and she broke up with him while she was gone, came back and met this new potential husband. I think any 8 & 12 year old would be confused, upset and feel abandoned. That is the word her counselor has used many times. FD, you may feel that because she see's her mom, she isn't abandoned and apparently you won't see things through the eyes of a child that was left for a BF. That's YOUR problem but I think everyone else understands how heartbreaking it must be for this child.

Hello Everyone, this update is long overdue. After my last post, we got a Custody Evaluator involved. After five months of psych tests, evaluations, mandatory counselling etc, etc, the Custody Evaluator saw through the ex-wife's crap. It was such a relief to have someone take the time to really look into what was going on. The girls have been through hell and back. They are in counselling now. The Custody Evaluator gave 50/50 access and will determine legal custody very shortly. It was confirmed that the ex-wife was doing drugs, was drugging the girls, was leaving them alone and in fact and generally being an absolute horrible parent. The Evaluator actually said in the meeting, "you abandoned your children for years" But, the system still favours mothers, particularly ones that cry the blues and say they have changed, and very generously gave her 50/50. Not that we don't want the girls to see their mother, but the damage she continues to do with her extreme alienation tactics is horrible. The girls therapist is going to report back to the custody evaluator in a few months and will no doubt confirm the girls' issues are being caused by the mother's alienation tactics. Hopefully they can force her to stop emotionally abusing them. It is painful to watch. I can't imagine what they are going through when they go to her house. While she cried that she is a changed woman, she is continuing to do the same things before the evaluation. By the way, my and my husband's psych tests came back very positive. While we have not had the opportunity to review the ex-wife's, we already know that it came back that she is seriously emotionally screwed up. We know that she has Borderline Personality Disorder. She has been court ordered into regular therapy. She has been court ordered not to use drugs or alcohol when the girls are with her. There are many more restrictions. The good news is that there is hope and the girls have not been taken away from their father simply because he is a man. The bad news is that she is continuing to get away with her behaviour simiply because she is the woman/mother. I want to thank all of you who recommended certain books and sites etc. They were all very helpful and helped us cope with this stressful situation. Please keep your fingers crossed that in a few months, the father is granted sole legal custody. The mother is completely incapable of putting the girls first and of acting reasonably. He is a great father and has always put them first and I have no doubt always will. It was so nice to finally have an "official" state in front of everyone that the girls were living in a very stable andloving home until the mother decided to get back into their lives and cause havoc. We pray that this ordeal is over soon so that we can all get back to living.

Sorry ashley missed your post.... Mom called DSS back in July when I refused to let SD talk to her mom after she had already been on the phone with her for 4 hours. When DSS came to our home they didn't find anything to really charge any of us with .... but they felt SD actions required some immediate intervention... so they came once in july once in aug and once in sept. to our home but they go weekly to mom's on either a wed or fri... to "meet with the children" because every monday and thurs mom would call and report us to DSS for something else .... she even took SD9 and SS10 to the police station to file a report against hubby because he let them go to their mothers instead of arguing with them ... she said he was just looking to get rid of them ... then she had them speak to the judge how "they were afraid to come home" So DSS thinks SD is in danger. The boys are in counseling mom met with their counselors last week ... I spoke with the counselor on tues (14th) and said ... well DSS had til friday (10th) to have services in place so I am guessing they are closing the case ... DSS called me an hour later to tell me they are keeping the case open and that the counselors filed against mom for emotional abuse of my SC. DSS told us in Sept they had big plans ... for us ... including family therapy, daily visits from a parenting aide, a whole list of "things" and none of it had been put in place by the 10th that was the end date of the 45 day assessment. Mom calls DSS one month before they have to go back to court this is the third time she has called but its the first time anything came of it .... When I spoke with DSS they said the parenting aide wasn't going to work because that was only an 8-week assessment and our case is going to take longer than 8 weeks .... If I hear one more person say for the sake of the children I am just going to explode!!!