My laugh for the day... Not SF related... well, maybe a little...

15 years ago

DH's grandfather is coming over for dinner Wed. DH told me yesterday evening, but I had been expecting him one day this week.

GPa eats early, so my day would be: pick up DD from school, drive home, get her homework started, etc. It will be 3:30 before I can even start to think about dinner. GPa eats at 5:30, which means he'll be at the house at 4:45 for wine and appetizers. Yes, one hour 15 minutes to cook, quick clean the kitchen and get myself presentable before he arrives.

NOT that I'm complaining. I love his GPa. It's just always a really tight squeeze on the day.

I asked last night what we should make, DH didn't know. I suggested a pasta salad because it has been so very very hot and I don't want to heat up the kitchen and grandpa is very health conscious , AND I can make the bulk of it today. (I make it with TONS of stuff in it and it always gets lots of compliments).

DH says no. So I suggest pork chops (I found some really beautiful ones at the new butcher shop I've been going to, and was wanting to try them).

DH says no. Then he says, what about those bone-things like pork? Ummmm, lamb chops? Does GPa like lamb? (it's one of those things... some people really don't prefer, including DD). So I tell him to email GPa and ask. Then I tell DH, I don't know where to get lamb consistently... except for Costco. Other stores sell it, but Costco is the only store I know will carry it and I'm not driving around like mad today trying to find some.

So DH starts to act like I'm going to Costco. LMAO. It's 100+ degrees, it's gonna be packed, no AC, I'll have to take DD (which means stopping at every sample station, and the people here act like Costco is responsible for feeding them, it gets extremely crazy and competitive)

No. So I say, "honey, that would be great. While you're there can you pick up some....." LOL. Short silence. "Oh," he says. I explained I'm not making a giant trip shopping for this, I love GPa, but we can make a simpler meal because I don't want to be in my housedress with my hair tied up in a scrunchie barefoot and sweaty when he comes over this time. (that was how I was last time, cooking up a storm, kitchen a mess.... and yeah, I was not particularly happy about it!!)

He says, you know, he's coming over tomorrow not today.

My Dear, Sweet, Ignorant Husband: Today I will have to shop, and straighten the house, and do the prep work. Along with helping DD with homework, powering out some laundry, etc. Tomorrow I will be assembling the meal and appetizers, along with straightening the house and helping dd with homework and getting her prepped.

So I tell him, if you want to help with any of that, I'm happy to search for the lamb.

Longer silence.

I felt really really good that I had just laid it out instead of taking it on, and then taking it out on everyone (especially DD) because I had taken on too much and was stressed out and hot and crabby and resentful.

Sometimes I really feel like I'm the only one who does jack around the house though. I know it's not true, and DH does do a lot, but when I came home last night and the dishes were stacked by the sink, the dishwasher needed to be unloaded, the basket of laundry was unfolded, there was no dinner ready and DD and I were back from her game at 7:30pm and she needed to be bathed and fed and bedded down for the night....

This is one of those.... if I were SM I would feel very put-upon, but DD is "mine" so I take it on myself and feel guilty for asking. But the heck if I'm going to take on the whole GPa weight as well. :)

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Comments (8)

mattie_gt
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
So to summarize, you are making pasta salad for dinner tomorrow, right? LOL!

I'm getting better at just asking for help, or better yet, doing what you did and giving DH options (would you rather go to the store or clean up the kitchen?) That seems to work better; if I just ask DH what he's going to do the answer may be alphabetize the CD's and then he thinks he's helping me! And if I don't say anything he may or may not help at all.

I don't think mens' brains work the same way ours do; I know DH is a horrible judge of long it will take to perform a series of tasks. He can fairly accurately estimate one, and can list all that needs to be done in one night - but somehow then he ends up thinking that the total will be way less time than it really is.
silversword
Original Author
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
grrrr.... no, I'm probably going to drive by this butcher shop I just remembered that has more 'exotic' meats and see if they have any. It's right on the way home easy in and out so won't take too much time.

THEN I'll probably make the salad!
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dotz_gw
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
" In my HOUSEDRESS" Thanks for my laugh of the day Silver, havent heard that word in eons..You and grandpa can party like its 1899...:)
silversword
Original Author
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
hahahaha dotz!!!!

I got that word from my mother. My housedresses are old sundresses, (some of them over 15 years old) so they're a little short or holey or inappropriate in some other way. When I get home from work, I'll throw one on to do housework.

I ended up missing the exit off the freeway for the butcher so went to Costco anyway. And it wasn't busy. And it wasn't hot. And I forgot DD had an after school activity at school, so I had an extra 45 minutes and just hit the store like a fiend - with a list! Managed to get out of there only spending $150, which is a record for me.

And, I must admit, $45 of that was for a bottle of Shalimar. I figured, you send me to Costco.... LOL. I've always wanted a bottle, and it's quickly becoming my favorite scent. I keep smelling my wrists. :) Oh, and DH doesn't even know I went to Costco, so he doesn't know I folded...

So, the menu is:

Red wine
Cheese plate with crackers and meats and grapes
Herb crusted lamb chops with pomegranate sauce on a bed of fresh cut corn and parsley
Parmesan sprinkled Asparagus
Quinoa with tiny bits of carrot and onion
Blueberry tarts and vanilla ice cream

I cleaned the house yesterday, got the asparagus trimmed and washed and in a glass tupperware. Sliced the cheese, washed the grapes. All I have to do today is prepare the meat, throw the quinoa and carrots and onions in the rice maker, steam the asparagus and toss it and make the blueberry tarts. And I cheated with the tarts. I bought some of those little mini crusts, pre-made.

DH was grumbling that three lamb chops apiece were not enough. I laughed, I can only eat one. I know Gpa will probably only eat two. I can't believe I thought DH hated lamb all this time. He insists he loves it. Who knew??? I've cooked it and (in my memory) he always complains. And DD flat out does not like it (which I can understand, it's gamey).

So..... I have to think of something to cook her, or something to go with the lamb that will match. I'll probably just do some herb crusted tofu with the pom sauce. I do a tofu side with a lot of meals I do, like teriyaki chicken... And she loves tofu. I just want to avoid the whole separate meal thing...
parent_of_one
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
wow, no way i would be having dinner parties on a weeknight.

I spend two hours on the road every day, an hour each way in traffic, I leave house at 6:15AM and get home around 6PM, traffic is so bad that no way i can even get to grocery stores. i am so tired after work and driving that no way, just no way.

I hope dinner went well but if it was me I would tell grandpa to visit on the weekend. You are better person than me, if grandpa insists coming on a weeknight I would take him to a local restaurant. you can't pay me enough to entertain anyone during the week.
silversword
Original Author
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
I guess that's the difference PO. If I had to drive that much it would be a different story. I'm only 10 minutes or so from my work. In rush hour it will take 20.

GPIL is a very very active man with a busy social life. During the week works for him. So I accommodate.

Dinner went great, except for some bad weather that knocked out power, twice! as I was getting ready to put the meat in the oven. Thank goodness it all worked out, and that I have a gas stove so was able to continue with the sauces, etc. while waiting.

And I'd take him to a restaurant, but he doesn't get home cooking... so... I'd rather cook for him most of the time. And it turns out he adores lamb.
laurencz
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
Good for you :) I'm going to have to usse this technique myself. Though I will say DH will do whatever I ask him to do, especially for parties/dinners, most often its not how I want it done or when I want it done lol...

Next time suggest a nice Sunday family supper, or take Gpa out for the early bird special :)
silversword
Original Author
15 years ago
last modified: 11 years ago
LMAO... Lauren, my Gpa in law is not the early-bird-special kind of guy. He's a real upper crust blue-blood type. He does't eat at Denny's or Applebees or anything like that. He eats at his country club...

And, like I said, he is available during the week, not on weekends, due to his heavy social calendar. I figure the guy is 89 years old, still lives by himself, goes to the gym for an hour every day and still works full time at his own company (but doesn't have to) and travels around the world.... I can accommodate his schedule. :)

Plus, he's a widower now. I cook home-cooked meals because he goes out a lot, gets delivery, buys pre-made meals from restaurants. He doesn't get home cooked meals...

My laugh for the day... Not SF related... well, maybe a little...

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mattie_gt

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My laugh for the day... Not SF related... well, maybe a little...

Comments (8)

mattie_gt

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