1st Day of School Calls!

15 years ago

All our kids started school last Friday. BM called last night at 9:45pm. Kids were in bed so I let it go to voicemail because me and dh did not need to talk to her for anything. She leaves a message in a ticked off voice saying "It's _________,__________, and _______'s MOTHER and I wanted to talk to them about their first day of school today but I guess nobody is answering the phone. Have MY CHILDREN call me back so they can tell their MOM about their first day of school.

Okay, so if you wanted to talk to them about their first day why did you wait 4 days after their first day to call?? And why would you call at 9:45pm on a school night??

Makes me think she left the message for someone else's benefit.....like maybe her parents were with her and she wanted to act like she has been calling and nobody lets the kids talk to her??

My dh said that her parents probably went home and were telling her how happy the kids are here and how attached to me they seem. When we saw them at sd's game my ss was attached at my hip as always. He always sits by me and leans on me and gives me hugs. And when the kids came home from visiting my sd's both ran up to me and hugged me. He thinks that grandparents told their daughter how the kids call me mom and like me so much so now she is in "I want to pretend I am a good mommy mode".

I just do not get all the games. If she wants to talk to her kids then all she has to do is call!! If we miss the call we do see the caller id or check voicemails and we ALWAYS have the kids call her back! But instead of calling regularly she calls once in a while and then lies about calling regularly. With cell phones how does she not have the ability to call regularly?

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Comments (16)

fiveinall
15 years ago
I think you hit the penny on the head... she I am sure caught some S*** from her parents about not staying in contact and I am sure they did tell her how great the kids are doing in yours and DH care...and I am sure it ticked her off! She doesn't really want know about how her kids first day of school went...she wanted to mark her territiory and be a B. I would have let it go to VM too...most parents have their kids in bed way before that on a school night..but of course she wouldn't know that because she does not parent her kids!
dogdogcrazy
15 years ago
Gosh, maybe she should just pea on the kids legs next time they see her, so she can mark her territory! "My Children marked with my scent" What a waist of brain matter!
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finedreams
15 years ago
at 9:45 I am in bed on school nights and I am not a kid.

can't believe this woman. remind her when is bed time. This woman is something else.
mom2emall
Original Author
15 years ago
When the kids get home today we will tell them she called and have them return the call. And I will make sure to tell them how late she called and to tell her that they are in bed by 9:00 at the latest so she knows to call earlier if she wants to talk to them.

She just makes my blood boil. All this "MY KIDS" bs makes me sick! If she is so into them being "HERS" then she should step up and be a parent. Sometimes I wonder if she is just so out there that she does not realize how pathetic she really is as a parent. I wonder if in her sick mind she thinks she is a good parent and we are the ones doing wrong?? Otherwise I do not know how she can look in the mirror each day and go on. And how can her family and friends and co-workers not look at her like a piece of crap?? How do you explain to people how you chose to move thousands of miles from your children, who are all still so young??
fiveinall
15 years ago
It's amazing..... our BM used to tell the postlady (small town got back to us from the postlady) the she didn't have custody because my DH husbands family had money....we were like huh? I too wonder how deadbeat parents can look themselves in the mirror..my guess is with many they try to make themselves out to look like a Victim so they are not "responsible" for not caring for their kiddos....
imamommy
15 years ago
My SD's mom tells her new BF's family that she 'escaped' an abusive relationship and that my husband 'took' their daughter and won't let her take her to live there. She's painted a picture of being the victim and they all feel so sorry for her (that' poor thing!!!) She tells them that I am abusing her daughter and there's nothing she can do about it. She also told them that she's afraid of me too because I threatened her with physical harm.

The truth: She CHOSE to move 3 hours away, a week after meeting 'the man of her dreams'. She moved on a week that her daughter was with dad. She then calls dad and tells him that she's moved and SD can now live with him. (She didn't really ask, but just told him that this is what's going to happen. Of course he happily agreed, they'd just spent five months in a heated custody battle)

She didn't escape an abusive relationship... she was living with her mom. She broke up from a long distance relationship of five years (very nice guy, I understand. But, he did write her a couple of nasty letters where he told her he hopes she chokes on her beer bottle... implying that she has a drinking problem) and she dated a several other guys in the year before she met this new BF, but none that lasted more than a week or two... except the guy she said she was going to marry, just about a month before she met this new BF. They broke up while she was out of state. Not sure why but it wasn't due to abuse. I think he was still dating but she wanted it to be exclusive.

As for me being abusive to her daughter and threatening her... I abused her daughter by putting peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in her school lunch and feeding her oatmeal. When BM tried to get in my face and start something, I told her to call CPS if she feels her kid is abused and she told me to shut up. I told her 'make me'. (yeah, not a mature conversation on both sides) but that was her interpretation of me threatening her. BTW, my SD tells me yesterday "Now I like peanut butter. Can you put peanut butter and grape jelly in my lunch?" So, I ask her since when does she like peanut butter and she says that at her mom's house, she can fix whatever she wants and sometimes all she can find is peanut butter so she fixes it and now she's grown to like it. After nearly starting world war 3 with me over something so dumb, it's all she has in her kitchen that SD can eat???? How abusive is she????? lol
mom2emall
Original Author
15 years ago
So the kids called bm afterschool yesterday. Bm asked oldest sd why nobody answered her call the night before and sd told her that they were in bed. BM says she did not call that late and should be able to call her children whenever she wants since she is MOM. Sd (I had to laugh about this one) told bm she can call anytime she wants but if its after bedtime then she will only be talking to voicemail!

BM now tells the kids of her "big plans" to move back here. Did not give a date when she is moving but says her and bf and their kids are moving "home" with her. I am confused because the whole reason bm gave for moving out of state was that bf joined the military and was going to basic training. (And he is in his 30's) Funny how they spent a few months living in a state his family lived in and then he got "transferred" to a state where she had family. Am I supposed to assume he is getting "transferred" back here now?? SO darn convenient!

Though I know when she owed us $ for pictures one of her excuses for not paying was that her bf got "layed off" from work. I was not aware the military layed people off??

She did tell the youngest (6yrs old) that when she moves "home" she will sign him up for sports. And she mentioned how wrong of us it is to only let the older 3 be in activities right now.
fiveinall
15 years ago
I bet you it never happens....
sounds like your oldest SD has BM figured out a bit!

What about the BF's kids mom? Or is BM their mom too? if she isnt wouldnt their BM care that her BF is gonna take them out of state?
Maybe they have worn out there welcome in their new state already....
mom2emall
Original Author
15 years ago
BM is the BM of BF's kids that I was referring to (though he has other kids elsewhere that I do not think he sees with all their moving around).

I do think they probably moved to a new state thinking that they would somehow be able to support themselves after sponging off family for a while. But they are 2 people with only high school diplomas and little ambition. And neither one of them is very intellegent when it comes to managing money. So I do not think they will ever achieve any type of stability.
doodleboo
15 years ago
Sounds like stunt we would be dealing with. I also love the "my kids" crap. I always feel llke screaming "CORRECTION! YOU MEAN YOUR KIDS WHEN IT'S CONVIENIENT!" It's amusing to me that the girls are MY children when they have diarrhea or are up at 3 in the morning with fevers OR when they need new clothes or when it's time to plan and pay for a birthday party.
When she calls on their birthday however they are HER kids. Gag me.

I am the one who went through all the kindergarten enrollment stress,helped pay for school supplies and school clothes, went to the open house, helps them with homework every night,lays out their clothes for school...not bio mom. Ten bucks says she'll show up at the graduation ceremony and expect "special treatment" because she's "their mother". UGH! Don't even get me started.........
theotherside
15 years ago
They have HOMEWORK? In kindergarten??
mom_of_4
15 years ago
ugh... I can just imagine the drama that will happen if she does move back.. good lord!! But, I agree with others that is more than likely not going to happen. MY children... yeah right ... months without even a phone call much less support of any kind (emotional financial etc) whatever ... some people are so far in their own little worlds they cant see straight. Good for SD to stand up against her nonsense.

BTW my daughter has homework in kindergarten so did all of our other kids
newgardenelf
15 years ago
some parents both bio and step are stuck at some period in their childhood and they don't seem to have the skills to live in the adult world- they think children are toys that you take out and play with when you feel like it and expect them to be there and available for them when they want them to be....it is so sad...
doodleboo
15 years ago
I know this is off topic but I HAD to reply to the homework in kindergarten comment. YES! They do. Is that not ridiculous?! The girls get three ditto sheets monday thru thursday to do at home. Friday is a no homework day. I think it is so pointless to have kids trace numbers on a dumb ditto sheet. Ditto sheets are the devil. I almost feel guilty making the girls sit down and do the darn things......
theotherside
15 years ago
"I think it is so pointless to have kids trace numbers on a dumb ditto sheet."

I agree that it is ridiculous. What it teaches them in many cases is to hate school.
doodleboo
15 years ago
TOS

Don't even get me started on curriculum....I will go way off topic on a tangent:)

1st Day of School Calls!

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