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lilysuzanne40

thanks for help, things are better

24 years ago

I posted a question about how to deal with my stepmother and got some really good advice. I have to tell you ... it worked! Call it "kill her with kindness" or "being kind to those who persecute you," whatever it was, it worked, at least nominally. I wrote a letter to her, telling her that I hoped she and Dad were happy, that I knew she thought I hated her and that it wasn't true and that she is welcome in the family. I can't say it's a miracle cure, because I still think she is willing to trash me behind my back to my dad, but things are better. The biggest problem I am having is that my respect and trust I had placed with my dad has diminished because of this situation. When my mom was alive, I knew she always loved and supported me and gave me the benefit of the doubt, no matter what. I always thought that was true of my dad, too, but this situation has shown me how wrong I could be. For any biological fathers or mothers out there, that's a danger for you. If you have a spouse who is resistant to your children, who doesn't like your children or who encourages you to spend less time with your children, your children will notice and will respect and trust you less. I know it's a fine line to walk, but there's nothing wrong with telling a spouse that he or she is being unfair about your children.

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